Absalom said to Hushai, “Is this your kindness to your friend? Why didn’t you go with your friend?”
Parallel Translations
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Absalom said to Hushai, “Is this your kindness to your friend? Why didn’t you go with your friend?”
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And Absalom said to Hushai, Is this thy kindness to thy friend? why wentest thou not with thy friend?
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And Absalom said to Hushai: 'Is this thy kindness to thy friend? why wentest thou not with thy friend?'
Cross-references (5)
Passages linked to 2 Samuel 16:17 in the Treasury of Scripture Knowledge, ordered by reader-vote popularity; verse text shown in World English Bible.
- 2 Samuel 19:25 When he had come to Jerusalem to meet the king, the king said to him, “Why didn’t you go with me, Mephibosheth?”
- Deuteronomy 32:6 Is this the way you repay Yahweh, foolish and unwise people? Isn’t he your father who has bought you? He has made you and established you.
- 2 Samuel 15:32-37 When David had come to the top, where God was worshiped, behold, Hushai the Archite came to meet him with his tunic torn, and earth on his head. David said to him, “If you pass on with me, then you will be a burden to me; but if you return to the city, and tell Absalom, ‘I will be your servant, O king. As I have been your father’s servant in time past, so I will now be your servant; then will you defeat for me the counsel of Ahithophel.’ Don’t you have Zadok and Abiathar the priests there with you? Therefore whatever you hear out of the king’s house, tell it to Zadok and Abiathar the priests. Behold, they have there with them their two sons, Ahimaaz, Zadok’s son, and Jonathan, Abiathar’s son. Send to me everything that you shall hear by them.” So Hushai, David’s friend, came into the city; and Absalom came into Jerusalem.
- Proverbs 17:17 A friend loves at all times; and a brother is born for adversity.
- Proverbs 18:24 A man of many companions may be ruined, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
Cross-references from openbible.info (CC BY 4.0)
Explain this verse (11 sources)
Historical commentary, presented as a primary source — not an endorsement.
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Geneva Bible translators 1599 · Public Domain Meaning, David.
Meaning, David.
Geneva Bible (1599) marginal notes — public domain.
John Trapp 1656 · Public Domain 2Sa 16:17 And Absalom said to Hushai, [Is] this…
2Sa 16:17 And Absalom said to Hushai, [Is] this thy kindness to thy friend? why wentest thou not with thy friend?
Ver. 17. Is this thy kindness to thy friend?] He saith not, To my father: for so he should have tacitly taxed himself of far greater ingratitude, and fouler disloyalty, than he had done Hushai.
John Trapp, A Commentary or Exposition upon All the Books of the Old and New Testament (1647–1656) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Matthew Poole 1685 · Public Domain Is this thy kindness to thy friend? doth this…
Is this thy kindness to thy friend? doth this action answer that profession of greatest friendship which thou hast hitherto made to him? Dost thou thus requite his favour and true friendship to thee? He speaks thus only to try him. And he saith, thy friend, by way of refection on David; as one who was a friend to Hushai, and to strangers, but not to his own sown, whom, by his severity and design to give away his right to Solomon, he provoked to this course; and therefore he doth not vouchsafe to call him his father.
Matthew Poole's English Annotations on the Holy Bible (1683–1685) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword/MySword module.
John Gill 1763 · Public Domain And Absalom said to Hushai, is this thy kindness…
And Absalom said to Hushai, is this thy kindness to thy friend?.... Meaning to David; though he would not mention his name, nor his title, nor even the relation of a father he stood in to him, only speaks of him as Hushai's friend: Hushai had professed great friendship to David, and David had been a friend to Hushai, had raised him to great honour in making him a counsellor, and had bestowed many favours and benefits on him, as Absalom knew full well; and therefore, to try his integrity, he puts this question, not as displeased with him, but overjoyed that such a trusty friend of David, and a wise counsellor of his, had deserted him, and come over to him and his party; nor does he mean to charge him with ingratitude, which he could not do without reproaching himself; on whom it might be justly retorted, is this thy kindness to thy father that begot thee, and has always expressed such a strong affection for thee, as to rebel against him?
why wentest thou not with thy friend? with David, when he went out of Jerusalem; for Absalom knew not that Hushai had been with David, but thought he stayed behind at Jerusalem, when David fled, which made him less suspicious of him.
John Gill's Exposition of the Whole Bible (1746–1763) — public domain (CC PDM 1.0). Text via the HelloAO Bible API.
John Wesley 1765 · Public Domain Is this - Doth this action answer that profession…
Is this - Doth this action answer that profession of friendship which thou hast hitherto made to him? He speaks thus only to try him. And he saith, thy friend, by way of reflection upon David; as one who was a friend to Hushai, and to strangers but not to his own son, whom, by his severity he provoked to this course; and therefore he doth not vouchsafe to call him his father.
John Wesley, Explanatory Notes Upon the Whole Bible (1754–1765) — public domain. Text via the GEBible commentary corpus.
Joseph Benson 1811 · Public Domain 2Sa 16:17. Is this thy kindness to thy friend?…
2Sa 16:17. Is this thy kindness to thy friend? — Doth this action answer that profession of friendship which thou hast hitherto made to him? He speaks thus only to try him. He does not say, To my father, for that question would have reflected a heavier reproach upon himself, who had forsaken not only a friend, but his own father, and even forced him away. Or, perhaps, by saying, Thy friend, he meant to insinuate, that David was a friend to Hushai, and to strangers, but not to his own son, whom by severity he had provoked to take this course; and therefore he doth not vouchsafe to call him his father.
Joseph Benson's Commentary on the Old and New Testaments (1811–1818) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Haydock's Catholic Bible Commentary 1859 · Public Domain Friend. He rather accuses him of treachery. (Haydock) ---…
Friend. He rather accuses him of treachery. (Haydock) --- But he does not mention the name of king, or of father, lest it should too plainly speak his own condemnation, as an ungrateful rebel. (Salien)
George Leo Haydock (1774–1849), Haydock's Catholic Family Bible and Commentary, 1859 edition — public domain. Excludes Psalms (Douay-Rheims chapter numbering differs from Protestant) and Deuterocanonical books (Catholic canon only).
Daniel D. Whedon 1874 · Public Domain 17. Thy friend — By “thy” friend Absalom means…
17. Thy friend — By “thy” friend Absalom means David. By these questions he seeks to sound the depth of Hushai’s professed loyalty to himself.
Daniel D. Whedon (gen. ed.), Commentary on the Old and New Testaments (1874–1909) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
The Pulpit Commentary 1880 · Public Domain Is this thy kindness to thy friend? After carrying…
Is this thy kindness to thy friend? After carrying the king to Ayephim, on the banks of the Jordan, the narrator now turns back to Absalom, because David was to wait at the caravanserai for news from Jerusalem. And immediately on his arrival, Hushai hastens into Absalom"s presence, loudly exclaiming, "Long live the king!" for such is the meaning of the Hebrew. The young man is surprised; for Hushai was David"s friend and trusted confidant. Yet he does not suspect this sudden breaking of old ties, but, looking at the bright side only, sees in it a proof that his party was looked upon as sure of success, and David"s cause as hopeless. He welcomes, therefore, so notable an adherent, and Hushai"s pretences confirm his self-deceit; for he professes to regard Absalom as king, not by fraud and violence, but by the formal choice of both Jehovah and the people. On this assumption, obedience to the nation"s choice became a religious duty, and Hushai"s love to the father was a pledge of love to the son. We must not, however, condemn Absalom for too easy credulity. The nation was in his favour, and, had he acted with promptitude, David"s cause would have been lost.
Unfaithful friends.
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Bad men may and often do see and reprove in others the baseness they are themselves practising, and thus unconsciously condemn themselves. Absalom reproves his father"s friend Hushai for supposed unkindness and unfaithfulness to him, while he himself, not merely a friend, but a fondly loved son, was usurping his father"s throne, and ready to take away his life. (2Sa_17:2, 2Sa_17:4) Nevertheless, the sentiment which underlies his remonstrance is just, and Hushai would have deserved severe rebuke if he had really been guilty of the conduct he was charged with. It was a time for David"s friends to prove themselves to be friends indeed; and to desert him at such a time (as Ahithophel did) would have been perfidious in the extreme. Hushai, however, was serving him by obeying his directions and promoting his interests. Whether the deception he practised on Absalom was justifiable is another, question, depending for its solution on the answer to be given to the larger question whether and how far belligerents are bound by the ordinary laws of truth and righteousness. The remonstrance of Absalom is suitable to be addressed to any who are acting in a manner contrary to the duties of friendship. As one and another instance of unfaithfulness or unkindness occurs, the question might well be put to those guilty of them, "Is this thy kindness to thy friend?" The force of the remonstrance would be proportionate to the degree of friendship which had existed, the benefits received, the professions made, etc.; and also the degree of flagrant violation of the laws of friendship which each act exhibited. And if to the obligations of friendship are to be added those of some other relationship, as here that of subject and servant of a sovereign, the guilt of unfaithfulness is increased, and remonstrance may well be more severe. The words are very suitable to be addressed to professed friends of our Lord Jesus Christ who act a faithless and disloyal part towards him.
I CHRIST IS OUR ROYAL FRIEND. King, and yet Friend; Friend, and yet King. The claims of each relation to us strengthen those of the other. Although he is so glorious a King, he stoops to be and act the part of a Friend to the meanest and most sinful of his subjects.
1. He fills this position towards them:
(1) By his self-sacrificing services on their behalf. (Joh_15:13)
(2) By admitting them to the closest and most confidential intimacy of which each is capable. (Joh_15:15)
(3) By the greatness and abundance of the benefits he confers on them.
2. And they on their part take the position of friends to him:
(1) By their acceptance of his friendship.
(2) By their vows of eternal love, loyalty, and service to him. The relation of sovereign and subject is, in the best Christians, more and more lost in, though not destroyed by, that of friend and friend. A love boundless in its promptings and requirements overflows and obliterates the limits of mere law.
II TO ACT AN UNFRIENDLY PART TOWARDS HIM IS DESERVING OF THE SEVEREST REBUKE, "Is this thy kindness to thy friend?
1. Conduct to which the words are applicable.
(1) Desertion of Christ in times of difficulty. "Why wentest thou not with thy friend?"; (comp. Heb_13:13) "Let us go forth unto him without the camp, bearing his reproach.
(2) Moral cowardice in respect to him. The words might well have been addressed to Peter when denying his Lord and Friend were virtually addressed to him when "the Lord turned and looked" upon him. (Luk_22:61) It would be well if they could ever be heard by us whenever, from fear of man, we are silent when we ought to speak for Christ, inactive when we should act for him.
(3) Parsimony in gifts and services for the promotion of his cause.
(4) Failure in duties of love to his friends and representatives our fellow Christians, especially the poor and suffering. A timely reproach, reaching the heart, might prevent more terrible words at the day of judgment. (Mat_25:41-45)
(5) Any act whatever of inconsistency with our position and professions as disciples of Christ.
2. Their peculiar force. Arising from the words, "thy Friend.
(1) Who has proved himself a Friend indeed.
(2) Whom thou hast often addressed and rejoiced in as such.
(3) Whom thou hast often been glad to appeal to in that character for help and deliverance.
(4) To whom thou hast many times vowed eternal friendship, and fidelity unto death. The reproach, thus viewed, is adapted to break the offender"s heart, producing the deepest shame and self-humiliation, and leading to the most earnest penitence and prayers for forgiveness.
3. From what quarter the remonstrance might come.
(1) From a man"s own conscience and heart. It is well when these are sufficiently loyal to Christ to speedily address the offender after this manner.
(2) From other friends of Christ. Christians should be sufficiently faithful to their brethren and their Lord to lovingly reprove serious inconsistencies.
(3) From the enemies of Christ. As by David"s enemy the words were originally spoken. Those who are not themselves Christ"s disciples are often quick to detect the faults of those who are, and to taunt them with them. They sometimes thus render good service to Christians. Fas est et ab hoste doceri. G.W.
The Pulpit Commentary (1880–1919), ed. H.D.M. Spence-Jones & Joseph S. Exell — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
The Biblical Illustrator 1887 · Public Domain Is this thy kindness to thy friend?
2Sa_16:17
Is this thy kindness to thy friend?
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The character of Christ as a friend, and the inquiry He often proposes to each of His disciples
Friendship is the state of minds united by mutual benevolence. It has always been deemed one of the essential articles of human life and comfort. Men have pursued it for their honour, as well as for their happiness; for it is considered as disgraceful as it is distressing, to be without a friend. And who are those who, after a while, lose social intercourse and kind regards, but those who deserve it?--as whisperers, tale-bearers, backbiters, despisers of them that are good, and lovers of themselves. For he that will have friends must show himself friendly, and there is a Friend that sticketh closer than a brother. General associations will not supply the place of a friend. Gossips and visitors and acquaintances are not friends, unless such as Cowper speaks of, belonging to the lady who has her dear five hundred friends, whom she always found sycophants in her house, and every one of whom, before they reach their homes, are running her down. For while the friendship of the world is enmity with God, it is hypocrisy with men; and no conditions or rank places a man above the attractions of friendship. Kings have laid aside their royalties to indulge in it. Alexander would have found a conquered world a void without an Hephaestion. The dearest relations in life cannot supersede friendship. To the beloved name of brother and sister, husband and wife, must be added that of a friend, in order to fill up the comforts of human life. Oh, friendship, thou benefactor and comforter of the human race! how necessary art thou in a vale of tears, and in a world full of vanity and vexation of spirit! Thou art the delight of sanguine youth, and the prop of trembling age. Thou art the sweetener of prosperity, and the solace of adversity. The burdened heart, at thy presence, is relieved, and afflictions by thy hand are deprived of their tears. But while we hail the individual who has found a real friend, we are constrained to observe that it Is not very easy to find one. And, when you have laid down the infallible marks of a real friend, many who have worn the title will be found unworthy of the name, and weighed in the balances, will be found wanting. I make no apology for applying the inquiry to Christian experience. Nor shall I enter into the circumstances of the history in which it is found. Suffice it to say it is the language of Absalom, complaining of the conduct of Hushai.
I. We have to show that you have a friend. His adversaries called Him the Friend of sinners, and their design was to charge Him with being a Friend to their sins. This was infinitely false; but He was a Friend to their souls. This was infinitely true. He came to seek and to save that which was lost. Now let us look at a few of the qualities of this friend.
1. The characteristic of Benevolence. What is benevolence? Benevolence among men is often little more than a commerce of selfishness, and the offspring of sordid gain. Friendship amongst men arises from the possession of some amiable quality in the object regarded, either real or imaginary. But His friendship arises from no excellency in its subject, but is all undeserved favour.
2. The second characteristic of this friendship h sincerity. He is a friend who loves, not in words--in tongue, but in deed and in truth. He gives us all things richly to enjoy.
3. A third characteristic of this friendship is ability. Where the ear is heavy, that it cannot hear, the hand is often shortened, that it cannot save. Nothing is more painful to real affection than inability. To see a beloved object suffering beyond your reach,--to behold in him wants which you cannot relieve,--to witness in him pains which you cannot alleviate,--to hear the voice from parched lips, Pity me, pity me, Oh ye, my friends, for the hand of God hath touched me, and to be able only to shed unavailing tears.
(1) Speak we of wisdom? His understanding is infinite.
(2) Speak we of wealth? His riches are boundless. The world is His, and the fulness thereof in heaven and in earth. Speak we of strength? Lo! He is strong Nothing is too hard for Him. The Emperor Theodosius, having, on a signal occasion, opened all his prisons and released the prisoners, is reported to have said, And now would to God I could open all the tombs and give life to the dead! This was a noble saying, but in him it was an ineffectual one. However it is not so in regard to the Lord Jesus.
(4) Fidelity is the fourth characteristic of this friendship. It was wrong in David to say, All men are liars. He owns himself that he said it in his haste, and he should not have said it at all. There were few who ever had more faithful adherents than he.
(5) The last characteristic of this friendship which we shall mention is perpetuity. Now this is distinguishable from the former article. That regards the stability of friendship, this regards the continuance of it. For, however true, however faithful, a friend may be, he is mortal. His breath goeth forth, he returneth to the dust: in that very day his thoughts perish. Mortality is written on everything here. Yet have we set our hearts upon that which is not. But what is the language of Jesus? I will never leave thee nor forsake thee.
II. That you have often behaved very inconsistently, and improperly towards him, so as to constrain Him to say, Is this thy kindness to thy friend? We premise here two things.
(1) That it is not to be supposed that you can fully discharge the obligations you are under to this Friend, in this weak state of flesh and blood. But then you ought to be sensible of them, and show that you are willing to make suitable returns, though you cannot make adequate returns; and to be always asking, Lord, what wilt Thou have me to do? Therefore,
(2) we observe that God expects us to make suitable returns, and is disappointed if we do not.
Oh, what instances of ingratitude and unkindness compel Him to say, Is this thy kindness to thy friend? He does expect gratitude and a sense of obligation in His beneficiaries.
(1) It is reasonable and righteous for your friend to expect that you should obey him. He that hath My commandments and keepeth them, saith the Saviour, he it is that loveth Me. And none of His commandments are grievous.
(2) It is reasonable and righteous in your friend to expect that you should own Him and honour him before men.
(3) It is reasonable and righteous in your friend to expect that you should readily believe him and confide in him.
(4) It is reasonable and righteous in your friend to expect that you should be fair and open and unreserved with him.
(5) It is reasonable and righteous that your friend should expect that,, if any of his friends and relations be near you, you should behave kindly towards them. David inquired on a particular occasion, Is there any here of the house of Saul, that I may deal kindly towards them for Jonathans sake? The Saviour has brethren and sisters.
(6) It is reasonable and righteous in your friend to expect that if he left any emblem or memorial of his, you should highly prize it. Such a memorial you have with regard to Him in the Lords supper. It is the only representation of Him He has left in His church. Conclusion: There are such who have not this Saviour for their Friend: and is not this the case with some of you?--yea, with many of you. What! has He no form, nor comeliness, nor any beauty, that you should desire Him? who yet is fairer than the children of men; yea, who is altogether lovely. We speak this to your shame. Lord Brooks was a nobleman of our own country, but so charmed was he with that wise and accomplished person, Sir Philip Sidney, that, when he died, he would have no other inscription upon his tomb than this--Here lies the friend of Sir Philip Sidney. Oh, may my tomb but tell a tale that truly states here lies a friend of Jesus! (W. Jay, M. A.)
A test of friendship
Trusting a friend so long as there is no room for doubt or distrust, is very well so far as it goes. A decent man can hardly do any less than this. It is always easy to trust a friend as far as one sees. But the real test of fidelity in friendship is when others doubt or question, and when there is room or occasion for two opinions as to a friends conduct and appearance. True friendship evidences itself when one has to walk by faith, and not by sight. If one rests his trust on the friend because of what others think of that friend, that is one thing--there is no special friendship in that. But real friendship does not depend on outside testimony or opinions.
(Christian Weekly.)
Friendship
Friendship is a vase, which, when it is flawed by heat, or violence, or accident, may as well be broken at once; it never can be trusted after. The more graceful and ornamental it was, the more clearly do we discern the hopelessness of restoring it to its former state. Coarse stones if they are fractured may be cemented again: precious ones never. (Landor.)
Kindness
The love of friends is an active passion, and delights in rendering services and bestowing benefits. So sensible of this were the ancients that, in discussing the duties of friendship, what they asked was, not how much one friend ought to do for another, but where the limit was at which he ought to stop. They took it for granted that he would do, suffer, and give, all he could for his friends sake; and they only prescribed to him to restrain himself at the point where his zeal might clash with some still higher obligation to his family, his country, or his God. In accordance with this they represented friendship in art as a young man, bareheaded and rudely attired, to signify activity and aptness for service. Upon the fringe of his garment was written Death and Life, as signifying that in life and death friendship is the same. On his forehead was inscribed Summer and Winter, meaning that in prosperity or adversity friendship knows no change, except in the variety of its services. The left shoulder and the arm were naked down to the heart, to which the finger of the right hand pointed at the words Far and Near, which expressed that true friendship is not impaired by time or dissolved by distance. Of this feature in the friendship of Jesus it would be easy to give examples. (J. Stalker, M. A.)
Concerning kindness to our best friend
Mr. Payson, the American divine, was out one day with a brother minister who had to make a call at a ladys house, and Payson went in with him. The lady pressed them both to stay to tea. She was not a Christian woman, and Payson had other business, and therefore demurred; but as she pressed him very earnestly he sat down, and invoked the divine blessing, which he did in terms so sweet and full of holy unction that he impressed everybody. The lady waited upon him with great attention, and when he rose up to go he said to her, Madam, I thank you much for your great kindness to us; but how do you treat my Master? A work of grace was wrought in that lady by the question; she was brought to Jesus; she opened her house for preaching, and a revival followed..
The Biblical Illustrator, edited by Joseph S. Exell (c. 1880s–1900s) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
unfoldingWord translationNotes 2017 · CC BY-SA 4.0 a strong feeling of support and love
loyalty
a strong feeling of support and love
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Is this your loyalty to your friend? Why did you not go with him?
These rhetorical questions are asked to criticize Hushai. They can be translated as a statement. AT: "You have been a loyal friend to David; you should have gone with him." (See: Rhetorical Question)
the one whom Yahweh
Hushai is referring to Absalom.
the one whom ... that is the man ... with him
Here Hushai is referring to Absalom in the third person to take emphasize off of him and place it on Yahweh and the people who chose him. This can be written in second person. AT: "you are the one whom ... you are the man ... with you" (See: First, Second, or Third Person)
translationWords
people group
unfoldingWord translationNotes — © Distant Shores Media and the Door43 World Missions Community, licensed CC BY-SA 4.0. Source: git.door43.org/Door43/en_tn.