Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with a promise: “that it may be well with you, and you may live long on the earth.”
Parallel Translations
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Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.
“Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with a promise:
“that it may be well with you, and you may live long on the earth.”
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Chyldren obey youre fathers and mothers in the Lorde: for so is it right.
Honoure thy father and mother that is the fyrst commaundement that hath eny promes
that thou mayst be in good estate and lyve longe on the erthe.
Show all 3 translations
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Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.
Honour thy father and mother (which is the first commandement with promise)
That it may be well with thee, and that thou mayst liue long on earth.
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Questions where the Bible appears to say two different things, with the passages on each side set together.
Cross-references (47)
- Exodus 20:12 (v2) “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land which Yahweh your God gives you.
- Colossians 3:20-25 (v1) Children, obey your parents in all things, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, don’t provoke your children, so that they won’t be…
- Deuteronomy 5:16 (v3) “Honor your father and your mother, as Yahweh your God commanded you; that your days may be long, and that it may go well with you in the…
- Proverbs 23:22 (v1) Listen to your father who gave you life, and don’t despise your mother when she is old.
- Proverbs 6:20 (v1) My son, keep your father’s commandment, and don’t forsake your mother’s teaching.
Show all 47 cross-references
- Proverbs 1:8 (v1) My son, listen to your father’s instruction, and don’t forsake your mother’s teaching:
- Colossians 3:16-17 (v1) Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly; in all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs,…
- Deuteronomy 21:18 (v1) If a man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey the voice of his father or the voice of his mother, and though they chasten…
- Deuteronomy 27:16 (v2) ‘Cursed is he who dishonors his father or his mother.’ All the people shall say, ‘Amen.’
- Leviticus 19:3 (v1) “ ‘Each one of you shall respect his mother and his father. You shall keep my Sabbaths. I am Yahweh your God.
- Romans 12:2 (v1) Don’t be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what is the good, well-pleasing,…
- Matthew 15:4-6 (v2) For God commanded, ‘Honor your father and your mother,’ and, ‘He who speaks evil of father or mother, let him be put to death.’ But you…
- 1 Timothy 5:4 (v1) But if any widow has children or grandchildren, let them learn first to show piety toward their own family and to repay their parents, for…
- Deuteronomy 4:40 (v3) You shall keep his statutes and his commandments which I command you today, that it may go well with you and with your children after you,…
- Ephesians 6:5-6 (v1) Servants, be obedient to those who according to the flesh are your masters, with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as to…
- Proverbs 20:20 (v2) Whoever curses his father or his mother, his lamp shall be put out in blackness of darkness.
- Job 33:27 (v1) He sings before men, and says, ‘I have sinned, and perverted that which was right, and it didn’t profit me.
- Proverbs 30:17 (v1) “The eye that mocks at his father, and scorns obedience to his mother: the ravens of the valley shall pick it out, the young eagles shall…
- Luke 2:51 (v1) And he went down with them, and came to Nazareth. He was subject to them, and his mother kept all these sayings in her heart.
- Romans 7:12 (v1) Therefore the law indeed is holy, and the commandment holy, and righteous, and good.
- Deuteronomy 12:28 (v3) Observe and hear all these words which I command you, that it may go well with you and with your children after you forever, when you do…
- Malachi 1:6 (v2) “A son honors his father, and a servant his master. If I am a father, then where is my honor? And if I am a master, where is the respect…
- 1 Peter 2:13 (v1) Therefore subject yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord’s sake: whether to the king, as supreme;
- Ezekiel 22:7 (v2) In you have they treated father and mother with contempt. Among you they have oppressed the foreigner. In you they have wronged the…
- Hosea 14:9 (v1) Who is wise, that he may understand these things? Who is prudent, that he may know them? For the ways of Yahweh are right, and the…
- Mark 7:9-13 (v2) He said to them, “Full well do you reject the commandment of God, that you may keep your tradition. For Moses said, ‘Honor your father and…
- Deuteronomy 12:25 (v3) You shall not eat it, that it may go well with you and with your children after you, when you do that which is right in Yahweh’s eyes.
- Jeremiah 35:18 (v2) Jeremiah said to the house of the Rechabites, “Yahweh of Armies, the God of Israel, says: ‘Because you have obeyed the commandment of…
- Genesis 28:7 (v1) and that Jacob obeyed his father and his mother, and was gone to Paddan Aram.
- Deuteronomy 6:3 (v3) Hear therefore, Israel, and observe to do it, that it may be well with you, and that you may increase mightily, as Yahweh, the God of your…
- Deuteronomy 6:18 (v3) You shall do that which is right and good in Yahweh’s sight, that it may be well with you and that you may go in and possess the good land…
- Deuteronomy 22:7 (v3) You shall surely let the hen go, but the young you may take for yourself, that it may be well with you, and that you may prolong your days.
- Ruth 3:1 (v3) Naomi her mother-in-law said to her, “My daughter, shall I not seek rest for you, that it may be well with you?
- Psalms 128:1-2 (v3) Blessed is everyone who fears Yahweh, who walks in his ways. For you will eat the labor of your hands. You will be happy, and it will be…
- Proverbs 30:11 (v1) There is a generation that curses their father, and doesn’t bless their mother.
- Isaiah 3:10 (v3) Tell the righteous “Good!” For they shall eat the fruit of their deeds.
- Jeremiah 42:6 (v3) Whether it is good, or whether it is bad, we will obey the voice of Yahweh our God, to whom we send you; that it may be well with us, when…
- Esther 2:20 (v1) Esther had not yet made known her relatives nor her people, as Mordecai had commanded her; for Esther obeyed Mordecai, like she did when…
- Psalms 19:8 (v1) Yahweh’s precepts are right, rejoicing the heart. Yahweh’s commandment is pure, enlightening the eyes.
- Romans 16:2 (v1) that you receive her in the Lord, in a way worthy of the saints, and that you assist her in whatever matter she may need from you, for she…
- Genesis 37:13 (v1) Israel said to Joseph, “Aren’t your brothers feeding the flock in Shechem? Come, and I will send you to them.” He said to him, “Here I am.”
- Psalms 119:75 (v1) Yahweh, I know that your judgments are righteous, that in faithfulness you have afflicted me.
- 1 Corinthians 15:58 (v1) Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the Lord’s work, because you know that your labor is not in…
- 1 Samuel 17:20 (v1) David rose up early in the morning, and left the sheep with a keeper, and took and went, as Jesse had commanded him. He came to the place…
- Nehemiah 9:13 (v1) “You also came down on Mount Sinai, and spoke with them from heaven, and gave them right ordinances and true laws, good statutes and…
- Jeremiah 35:14 (v1) “The words of Jonadab the son of Rechab that he commanded his sons, not to drink wine, are performed; and to this day they drink none, for…
- Romans 13:7 (v2) Therefore give everyone what you owe: if you owe taxes, pay taxes; if customs, then customs; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor.
Cross-references from openbible.info (CC BY 4.0)
Explain this passage (29 sources)
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John Calvin 1540 · Public Domain On vv1–3 1. Children, obey. Why does the apostle use the…
1. Children, obey. Why does the apostle use the word obey instead of honor, which has a greater extent of meaning? It is because Obedience is the evidence of that honor which children owe to their parents, and is therefore more earnestly enforced. It is likewise more difficult; for the human mind recoils from the idea of subjection, and with difficulty allows itself to be placed under the control of another. Experience shews how rare this virtue is; for do we find one among a thousand that is obedient to his parents? By a figure of speech, a part is here put for the whole, but it is the most important part, and is necessarily accompanied by all the others.
In the Lord. Besides the law of nature, which is acknowledged by all nations, the obedience of children is enforced by the authority of God. Hence it follows, that parents are to be obeyed, so far only as is consistent with piety to God, which comes first in order. If the command of God is the rule by which the submission of children is to be regulated, it would be foolish to suppose that the performance of this duty could lead away from God himself.
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For this is right. This is added in order to restrain the fierceness which, we have already said, appears to be natural to almost all men. He proves it to be right, because God has commanded it; for we are not at liberty to dispute, or call in question, the appointment of him whose will is the unerring rule of goodness and righteousness. That honor should be represented as including obedience is not surprising; for mere ceremony is of no value in the sight of God. The precept, honor thy father and mother, comprehends all the duties by which the sincere affection and respect of children to their parents can be expressed.
John Calvin's Commentaries (1540-1563) — public domain. Text from the Calvin Translation Society English edition (1840s-50s) via the Christian Classics Ethereal Library (ccel.org). Calvin's coverage is partial (roughly two-thirds of the Bible); uncommented books and verses are honest gaps, never fabricated. The 19th-century editor's footnotes and remarks are omitted so the notes are faithfully Calvin's own voice.
Geneva Bible translators 1599 · Public Domain On vv1–2 For the Lord is author of all fatherhood, and…
For the Lord is author of all fatherhood, and therefore we must yield such obedience as he will have us.
He cometh to another part of a family, and showeth that the duty of the children toward their parents, consisteth in obedience unto them.
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The first argument: because God hath so appointed: whereupon it followeth also, that children are so far forth bound to obey their parents, as they may not swerve from the true worship of God.
The second argument: because this obedience is most just.
Geneva Bible (1599) marginal notes — public domain.
John Trapp 1656 · Public Domain On vv1–3 1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for…
1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.
Ver. 1. Children, obey your parents] As Isaac did Abraham in submitting to be sacrificed; as Christ became obedient even to the death of the cross.
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For this is right] Good and acceptable before God and men, 1Ti 5:4. {See Trapp on "Mat 15:4"}
John Trapp, A Commentary or Exposition upon All the Books of the Old and New Testament (1647–1656) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Matthew Poole 1685 · Public Domain On vv1–3 Obey your parents; with inward reverence and promptness, as…
Obey your parents; with inward reverence and promptness, as well as in the outward act.
In the Lord; either, because the Lord commands it; or, in all things agreeable to his will: see Eph 5:21; Act 5:29.
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For this is right, or just, every way so, by the law of nature, of nations, and of God.
Matthew Poole's English Annotations on the Holy Bible (1683–1685) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword/MySword module.
William Burkitt 1703 · Public Domain On v1 Our apostle, in the foregoing chapter, began to treat…
Our apostle, in the foregoing chapter, began to treat of relative duties, and concluded that chapter with the duties of husbands and wives; he begins this with the duty of children and parents to each other.
And here we have observable, that he begins this with the duty of the inferior first, of the child to the parents, as he did before with the duty of the wife, Eph 5:22. He first puts them in mind of their duty who are to obey; that being the most difficult duty, and the persons concerned in it usually more defective, and the work less easy and pleasing to our nature.
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Observe, 2. The important duty which children are directed to: the duty of obedience and honour: Children, obey: honour your father and mother. This duty of honour and obedience implies inward reverence, and a lawful estimation of their persons, and honouring of them in heart, speech, and behaviour; it implies also outward observance, a pious regard to their instructions, executing all their commands which are not sinful, depending on their counsels, and following their good examples, owning with thankfulness their parents’ care and concern for them, and covering the failings and infirmities found in them.
Observe, 3. The object of this duty: both parents, not the father alone, or the mother only, but both father and mother jointly. Children, obey your parents; honour thy father and thy mother: as obedience belongeth to all children, of what age, or sex, or condition soever, so are children obliged to obey both parents, the mother as well as the father, yea, she is named first, Lev 19:3; her sex being weaker, she is the more subject to contempt, Pro 23:22, saying, Hearken to thy father which begat thee, and despise not thy mother when she is old.
Observe, 4. The noble principle from whence this obedience in children to parents ought to flow, namely, from the fear of God. Obey them in the Lord; that is, in obedience to his command, and in all things agreeable to his will, fearing his displeasure in case of disobedience: let not your obedience be barely natural and prudential, but christian and religious.
Observe, 5. The arguments used by our apostle to excite to the practice of this duty. The first argument is drawn from the equity of it, This is right; that is, the law of God and nature requires it. The great motive, which ought to excite us to the practice of any duty, is not so much the advantageousness, as the righteousness and equity, of the duty, as being commanded by God, and well pleasing in his sight: Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. A second argument is, because this is the first commandment of the second table, which has a particular promise annexed to it: This is the first commandment with promise, that is, with an express promise; for every commandment hath both a promise and a threatening implied in it, and annexed to it; but this is the first commandment with a promise expressed, and that is a promise of long life, That thy days may be long; and this promise is always fulfilled, either in kind or equivalency, either by enjoying a long life on earth, or a better life in heaven.
Learn hence, That although our first and chief motive to obedience be the equity and righteousness of what God requires, yet we may, as a secondary encouragement, have respect to the promised reward, and particularly to the temporal advantage of our obedience. Long life is here promised to children, as an encouragement to obedience, which is in itself a very valuable mercy and blessing; and having eyed the command of God in the first place, they may and ought to have respect to the recompense of reward in the next place.
William Burkitt's Expository Notes on the New Testament (1700–1703) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Matthew Henry 1710 · Public Domain On v1 Here we have further directions concerning relative duties, in…
Here we have further directions concerning relative duties, in which the apostle is very particular.
I. The duty of children to their parents. Come, you children, hearken to me, I will teach you the fear of the Lord. The great duty of children is to obey their parents (Eph 6:1), parents being the instruments of their being, God and nature having given them an authority to command, in subserviency to God; and, if children will be obedient to their pious parents, they will be in a fair way to be pious as they are. That obedience which God demands from their children, in their behalf, includes an inward reverence, as well as the outward expressions and acts. Obey in the Lord. Some take this as a limitation, and understand it thus: "as far as is consistent with your duty to God." We must not disobey our heavenly Father in obedience to earthly parents; for our obligation to God is prior and superior to all others. I take it rather as a reason: "Children, obey your parents; for the Lord has commanded it: obey them therefore for the Lord's sake, and with an eye to him." Or it may be a particular specification of the general duty: "Obey your parents, especially in those things which relate to the Lord. Your parents teach you good manners, and therein you must obey them. They teach you what is for your health, and in this you must obey them: but the chief things in which you are to do it are the things pertaining to the Lord." Religious parents charge their children to keep the ways of the Lord, Gen 18:19. They command them to be found in the way of their duty towards God, and to take heed of those sins most incident to their age; in these things especially they must see that they be obedient. There is a general reason given: For this is right, there is a natural equity in it, God has enjoined it, and it highly becomes Christians. It is the order of nature that parents command and children obey. Though this may seem a hard saying, yet it is duty, and it must be done by such as would please God and approve themselves to him. For the proof of this the apostle quotes the law of the fifth commandment, which Christ was so far from designing to abrogate and repeal that he came to confirm it, as appears by his vindicating it, Mat 15:4, etc. Honour thy father and mother (Eph 6:2), which honour implies reverence, obedience, and relief and maintenance, if these be needed. The apostle adds, which is the first commandment with promise. Some little difficulty arises from this, which we should not overlook, because some who plead for the lawfulness of images bring this as a proof that we are not bound by the second commandment. But there is no manner of force in the argument. The second commandment has not a particular promise; but only a general declaration or assertion, which relates to the whole law of God's keeping mercy for thousands. And then by this is not meant the first commandment of the decalogue that has a promise, for there is no other after it that has, and therefore it would be improper to say it is the first; but the meaning may be this: "This is a prime or chief commandment, and it has a promise; it is the first commandment in the second table, and it has a promise." The promise is, That it may be well with thee, etc., Eph 6:3. Observe, Whereas the promise in the commandment has reference to the land of Canaan, the apostle hereby shows that this and other promises which we have in the Old Testament relating to the land of Canaan are to be understood more generally. That you may not think that the Jews only, to whom God gave the land of Canaan, were bound by the fifth commandment, he here gives it a further sense, That it may be well with thee, etc. Outward prosperity and long life are blessings promised to those who keep this commandment. This is the way to have it well with us, and obedient children are often rewarded with outward prosperity. Not indeed that it is always so; there are instances of such children who meet with much affliction in this life: but ordinarily obedience is thus rewarded, and, where it is not, it is made up with something better. Observe, 1. The gospel has its temporal promises, as well as spiritual ones. 2. Although the authority of God be sufficient to engage us in our duty, yet we are allowed to have respect to the promised reward: and, 3. Though it contains some temporal advantage, even this may be considered as a motive and encouragement to our obedience.
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II. The duty of parents: And you fathers, Eph 6:4. Or, you parents, 1. "Do not provoke your children to wrath. Though God has given you power, you must not abuse that power, remembering that your children are, in a particular manner, pieces of yourselves, and therefore ought to be governed with great tenderness and love. Be not impatient with them, use no unreasonable severities and lay no rigid injunctions upon them. When you caution them, when you counsel them, when you reprove them, do it in such a manner as not to provoke them to wrath. In all such cases deal prudently and wisely with them, endeavouring to convince their judgments and to work upon their reason." 2. "Bring them up well, in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, in the discipline of proper and of compassionate correction, and in the knowledge of that duty which God requires of them and by which they may become better acquainted with him. Give them a good education." It is the great duty of parents to be careful in the education of their children: "Not only bring them up, as the brutes do, taking care to provide for them; but bring them up in nurture and admonition, in such a manner as is suitable to their reasonable natures. Nay, not only bring them up as men, in nurture and admonition, but as Christians, in the admonition of the Lord. Let them have a religious education. Instruct them to fear sinning; and inform them of, and excite them to, the whole of their duty towards God."
III. The duty of servants. This also is summed up in one word, which is, obedience. He is largest on this article, as knowing there was the greatest need of it. These servants were generally slaves. Civil servitude is not inconsistent with Christian liberty. Those may be the Lord's freemen who are slaves to men. "Your masters according to the flesh (Eph 6:5), that is, who have the command of your bodies, but not of your souls and consciences: God alone has dominion over these." Now, with respect to servants, he exhorts, 1. That they obey with fear and trembling. They are to reverence those who are over them, fearing to displease them, and trembling lest they should justly incur their anger and indignation. 2. That they be sincere in their obedience: In singleness of heart; not pretending obedience when they design disobedience, but serving them with faithfulness. 3. They should have an eye to Jesus Christ in all the service that they perform to their masters (Eph 6:5-7), doing service as to the Lord, and not to men; that is, not to men only or principally. When servants, in the discharge of the duty of their places, have an eye to Christ, this puts an honour upon their obedience, and an acceptableness into it. Service done to their earthly masters, with an eye to him, becomes acceptable service to him also. To have an eye to Christ is to remember that he sees them and is ever present with them, and that his authority obliges them to a faithful and conscientious discharge of the duties of their station. 4. They must not serve their masters with eye-service (Eph 6:6) - that is, only when their master's eye is upon them; but they must be as conscientious in the discharge of their duty, when they are absent and out of the way, because then their Master in heaven beholds them: and therefore they must not act as men-pleasers - as though they had no regard to the pleasing of God, and approving themselves to him, if they can impose upon their masters. Observe, A steady regard to the Lord Jesus Christ will make men faithful and sincere in every station of life. 5. What they do they must do cheerfully: Doing the will of God from the heart, serving their masters as God wills they should, not grudgingly, nor by constraint, but from a principle of love to them and their concerns. This is doing it with good-will (Eph 6:7), which will make their service easy to themselves, pleasing to their masters, and acceptable to the Lord Christ. There should be good-will to their masters, good-will to the families they are in; and especially a readiness to do their duty to God. Observe, Service, performed with conscience, and from a regard to God, though it be to unrighteous masters, will be accounted by Christ as service done to himself. 6. Let faithful servants trust God for their wages, while they do their duty in his fear: Knowing that whatsoever good thing (Eph 6:8), how poor and mean soever it may be, considered in itself, - the same shall he receive of the Lord, that is, by a metonymy, the reward of the same. Though his master on earth should neglect or abuse him, instead of rewarding him, he shall certainly be rewarded by the Lord Christ, whether he be bond or free, whether he be a poor bond-servant or a freeman or master. Christ regards not these differences of men at present; nor will he in the great and final judgment. You think, "A prince, or a magistrate, or a minister, that does his duty here, will be sure to receive his reward in heaven: but what capacity am I, a poor servant, in, of recommending myself to the favour of God." Why, God will as certainly reward thee for the meanest drudgery that is done from a sense of duty and with an eye to himself. And what can be said more proper either to engage or to encourage servants to their duty?
IV. The duty of masters: "And you masters, do the same things unto them (Eph 6:9); that is, act after the same manner. Be just to them, as you expect they should be to you: show the like good-will and concern for them, and be careful herein to approve yourselves to God." Observe, Masters are under as strict obligations to discharge their duty to their servants as servants are to be obedient and dutiful to them. "Forbearing threatening; anientes - moderating threatening, and remitting the evils with which you threaten them. Remember that your servants are made of the same mould with yourselves, and therefore be not tyrannical and imperious over them, knowing that your Master also is in heaven:" some copies read, both your and their Master. "You have a Master to obey who makes this your duty; and you and they are but fellow-servants in respect of Christ. You will be as punishable by him, for the neglect of your duty, or for acting contrary to it, as any others of meaner condition in the world. You are therefore to show favour to others, as ever you expect to find favour with him; and you will never be a match for him, though you may be too hard for your servants." Neither is there respect of persons with him; a rich, a wealthy, and a dignified master, if he be unjust, imperious, and abusive, is not a jot the nearer being accepted of God for his riches, wealth, and honour. He will call masters and servants to an impartial account for their conduct one to another, and will neither spare the former because they are more advanced nor be severe towards the latter because they are inferior and mean in the world. If both masters and servants would consider their relation and obligation to God and the account they must shortly give to him, they would be more careful of their duty to each other. Thus the apostle concludes his exhortation to relative duties.
Matthew Henry's Commentary on the Whole Bible (1708–1710) — public domain (CC PDM 1.0). Text via the HelloAO Bible API.
John Gill 1763 · Public Domain On vv1–3 Children, obey your parents in the Lord,.... The persons…
Children, obey your parents in the Lord,.... The persons whose duty this is, "children", are such of every sex, male and female, and of every age, and of every state and condition; and though the true, legitimate, and immediate offspring of men may be chiefly respected, yet not exclusive of spurious children, and adopted ones, and of children-in-law; and the persons to whom obedience from them is due, are not only real and immediate parents, both father and mother, but such who are in the room of parents, as step-fathers, step-mothers, guardians, nurses, &c. and all who are in the ascending line, as grandfathers, grandmothers, &c. to these, children should be subject and obedient in all things lawful, just, and good; in everything that is not sinful and unlawful, by the word of God; and in things indifferent, as much as in them lies, and even in things which are difficult to perform: and this obedience should be hearty and sincere, and not merely verbal, and in show and appearance, nor mercenary; and should be joined with gratitude and thankfulness for past favours: and it should be "in the Lord"; which may be considered either as a limitation of the obedience, that it should be in things that are agreeable to the mind and will of the Lord; or as an argument to it, because it is the command of the Lord, and is wellpleasing in his sight, and makes for his glory, and therefore should be done for his sake:
for this is right; it appears to be right by the light of nature, by which the very Heathens have taught it; and it is equitable from reason that so it should be; and it is just by the law of God, which commands nothing but what is holy, just, and good.
John Gill's Exposition of the Whole Bible (1746–1763) — public domain (CC PDM 1.0). Text via the HelloAO Bible API.
John Wesley 1765 · Public Domain On vv1–3 Children, obey your parents - In all things lawful.…
Children, obey your parents - In all things lawful. The will of the parent is a law to the child. In the Lord - For his sake. For this is right - Manifestly just and reasonable.
John Wesley, Explanatory Notes Upon the Whole Bible (1754–1765) — public domain. Text via the GEBible commentary corpus.
Adam Clarke 1810 · Public Domain On vv1–2 Children should obey their parents, that they may live…
CHAPTER VI.
Children should obey their parents, that they may live long
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and be happy, 1-3.
Parents should be tender towards their children, 4.
Servants should show all obedience and fidelity to their
masters, 5-8.
And masters should treat their servants with humanity, 9.
All should be strong in the Lord, and be armed with his armour,
because of their wily, powerful, and numerous foes, 10-13.
The different parts of the Christian armour enumerated, 14-17.
The necessity of all kinds of prayer and watchfulness, 18-20.
Tychicus is commissioned to inform the Ephesians of the
apostle's affairs, 21, 22.
The apostolic benediction and farewell, 23, 24.
NOTES ON CHAP VI.
Verse 1. Children, obey your parents] This is a duty with which God will never dispense; he commands it, and one might think that gratitude, from a sense of the highest obligations, would most strongly enforce the command.
In the Lord] This clause is wanting in several reputable MSS., and in same versions. In the Lord may mean, on account of the commandment of the Lord; or, as far as the parents commands are according to the will and word of God. For surely no child is called to obey any parent if he give unreasonable or unscriptural commands.
Adam Clarke's Commentary on the Bible (1810–1826) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword/MySword module.
Joseph Benson 1811 · Public Domain On v1 Eph 6:1-4. The apostle, having explained the duties of…
Eph 6:1-4. The apostle, having explained the duties of wives and husbands, proceeds to the duties of children and parents, and then to those of servants, or slaves rather, and masters, with which he finishes his account of relative duties. Children, obey your parents — Even your unbelieving parents, in every thing consistent with your duty to the Lord. In all things lawful, the will of the parent is a law to the child: for this is right — Manifestly just and reasonable. Honour — That is, love, reverence, obey, assist in all things; thy father and mother — The mother is particularly mentioned, as being more liable to be slighted than the father. Which is the first commandment with promise — For the promise implied in the second commandment does not belong to the keeping that command in particular, but the whole law. Whereas the fifth is the first commandment which hath a promise annexed to it in particular. This observation concerning the promise in the law, to those who honoured their parents, was made by the apostle, to show that the honouring of parents is a matter of the greatest importance to the well-being of society, and highly acceptable to God. That it may be well with thee — In temporal as well as spiritual things; and thou mayest live long on the earth — A promise that is usually fulfilled to eminently dutiful children; and he who lives long and well, has a long seed-time for an eternal harvest. But this promise in the Christian dispensation is to be understood chiefly in a more exalted and spiritual sense. And ye fathers — On the other hand, (whom he names rather than mothers, as being more apt to be stern and severe; mothers, however, are also included;) provoke not your children to wrath — By any harsh usage, or rigorous treatment of them. Do not needlessly fret or exasperate them; but bring them up — With all tenderness and mildness, and yet with steadiness; in the nurture and admonition — Εν παιδεια και νουθεσια, in the discipline and instruction; of the Lord — As these expressions stand connected with the word Lord, it seems reasonable to explain them of such a course of discipline and instruction as properly belongs to a religious education, which ought to be employed by those that believe in the Lord, in forming their children for him, by laying a restraint on the first appearance of every vicious passion, and nourishing them up in the words of faith and sound doctrine.
Joseph Benson's Commentary on the Old and New Testaments (1811–1818) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Albert Barnes 1834 · Public Domain On vv1–3 Children - τέκνα tekna This word usually signifies those…
Children - τέκνα tekna This word usually signifies those who are young; but it is used here, evidently, to denote those who were under the care and government of their parents, or those who were not of age.
Obey your parents - This is the first great duty which God has enjoined on children. It is, to do what their parents command them to do. The God of nature indicates that this is duty; for he has impressed it on the minds of all in every age; and the Author of revelation confirms it. It is particularly important:
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(1) Because the good order of a family, and hence of the community, depends on it; no community or family being prosperous where there is not due subordination in the household.
(2) Because the welfare of the child depends on it; it being of the highest importance that a child should be early taught obedience to “law,” as no one can be prosperous or happy who is not thus obedient.
(3) Because the child is not competent as yet; to “reason” on what is right, or qualified to direct himself; and, while that is the case, he must be subject to the will of some other person.
(4) Because the parent, by his age and experience, is to be presumed to be qualified to direct and guide a child. The love which God has implanted in the heart of a parent for a child secures, in general, the administration of this domestic government in such a way as not to injure the child. A father will not, unless under strong passion or the excitement of intoxication, abuse his authority. He loves the child too much. He desires his welfare; and the placing of the child under the authority of the parent is about the same thing in regard to the welfare of the child, as it would be to endow the child at once with all the wisdom and experience of the parent himself.
(5) It is important, because the family government is designed to be an imitation of the government of God. The government of God is what a perfect family government would be; and to accustom a child to be obedient to a parent, is designed to be one method of leading him to be obedient to God. No child that is disobedient to a parent will be obedient to God; and that child that is most obedient to a father and mother will be most likely to become a Christian, and an heir of heaven. And it may be observed, in general, that no disobedient child is virtuous, prosperous, or happy. Everyone foresees the ruin of such a child; and most of the cases of crime that lead to the penitentiary, or the gallows, commence by disobedience to parents.
In the Lord - That is, as far as their commandments agree with those of God, and no further. No parent can have a right to require a child to steal, or lie, or cheat, or assist him in committing murder, or in doing any other wrong thing. No parent has a right to forbid a child to pray, to read the Bible, to worship God, or to make a profession of religion. The duties and rights of children in such cases are similar to those of wives (see the notes on Eph 5:22); and in all cases, God is to be obeyed rather than man. When a parent, however, is opposed to a child; when he expresses an unwillingness that a child should attend a particular church, or make a profession of religion, such opposition should in all cases be a sufficient reason for the child to pause and re-examine the subject. he should pray much, and think much, and inquire much, before, in any case, he acts contrary to the will of a father or mother; and, when he does do it, he should state to them, with great gentleness and kindness, that he believes he ought to love and serve God.
For this is right - It is right:
(1)Because it is so appointed by God as a duty;
(2)Because children owe a debt of gratitude to their parents for what they have done for them;
(3)Because it will be for the good of the children themselves, and for the welfare of society.
Albert Barnes' Notes on the Bible (1834–1885) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword/MySword module.
Haydock's Catholic Bible Commentary 1859 · Public Domain On v2 With a promise. This commandment being delivered with a…
With a promise. This commandment being delivered with a special promise of a long life, which promise is to be understood conditionally, especially in regard to Christians, i.e. unless it be a greater favour to be taken out of the world young. (Witham)
George Leo Haydock (1774–1849), Haydock's Catholic Family Bible and Commentary, 1859 edition — public domain. Excludes Psalms (Douay-Rheims chapter numbering differs from Protestant) and Deuterocanonical books (Catholic canon only).
John Nelson Darby 1862 · Public Domain On v1 Ephesians Chapter 6
Ephesians Chapter 6
But it is not only that there is a line of conduct to follow, a model to imitate, a Spirit with whom one may be filled, it is not only relationships between oneself and God, and those in which we stand here below; this is not all that must occupy the Christian. He has enemies to fight. The people of Israel under Joshua in the land of Canaan were indeed in the promised land, but they were in conflict there with enemies who were in it before them, although not according to the rights by which Israel possessed the land through the gift of God. God had set it apart for Israel (see Deu 32:8); Ham had taken possession of it.
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Now, with regard to us, it is not with flesh and blood that we have to fight, as was the case With Israel. Our blessings are spiritual in the heavenly places. We are sitting in Christ in the heavenlies. We are a testimony to principalities and powers in the heavenlies; we have to wrestle with spiritual wickednesses in the heavenlies. Israel had passed through the wilderness-had crossed the Jordan; the manna had ceased; they ate the corn of the land. They were settled in the land of Canaan as though it were all their own without striking a blow. They ate the produce of this good land in the plains of Jericho. So it is with regard to the Christian. Although we are in the wilderness, we are also in the heavenly places in Christ. We have crossed the Jordan, we have died and are risen again with Him. We are sitting in the heavenly places in Him, that we may enjoy the things of heaven as the fruit of our own country. But conflict is before us, if we desire to enjoy them practically. The promise is of every blessing, of all the promised land, but wheresoever we shall set our foot on it (Jos 1:1-18). For this we need the Lord’s strength, and of this the apostle now speaks. “Be strong,” he says, “in the Lord.” The enemy is subtle. We have to withstand his stratagems even more than his power. Neither the strength nor even the wisdom of man can do anything here. We must be armed with the panoply, that is, the whole armour, of God.
But observe first, that the Spirit turns our thoughts upon God Himself before speaking of that which has to be overcome. “Be strong in the Lord.” It is not, first of all, a refuge from the face of the enemy; we are in it for ourselves before we use it against the wiles of the enemy. It is in the intimacy of the counsels and the grace of God that man fortifies himself for the warfare from which he cannot escape, if he would enjoy his Christian privileges. And he must have the whole armour. To be wanting in one piece exposes us to Satan on that side. The armour must be that of God-divine in its nature. Human armour will not ward off the attacks of Satan; confidence in that armour will engage us in the battle only to make us fall in combat with a spirit who is more mighty and more crafty than we are.
These enemies are thus characterised; they are principalities and powers-beings possessing an energy of evil which has its source in a will that has mastery over those who do not know how to resist it; they have also strength to carry it out. Their energy they have from God, the will that uses it comes from themselves; they have forsaken God; the spring of their actions is in their own will. In this respect it is a source of action independent of God, and the energy and the qualities which they have from God are the instruments of that will-a will which has no bridle except from outside itself. They are principalities and powers. There are good ones; but in them the will is only to do that which God wills, and to employ in His service the strength they have received from Him.
These rebellious principalities and powers rule over the darkness of this world. Light is the atmosphere in which God dwells, which He diffuses all around Himself. Wicked spirits deceive and reign in darkness. Now this world, not having the light of God, is entirely in darkness, and demons reign in it; for God is not there-except in supreme power after all, turning everything to His glory, and, in the end, to the good of His children.
But if these principalities rule in the darkness of this world they do not possess merely an outward force; they are in the heavenlies, and are occupied with spiritual wickedness there. They exercise a spiritual influence, as having the place of gods. There is then, first, their intrinsic character, their mode of being, and the state in which they are found; second, their power in the world as governing it; and third, their religious and delusive ascendency, as lodging in the heavens. They have also, as a sphere for the exercise of their power, the lusts of man, and even the terrors of his conscience.
To resist enemies like these we need the armour of God. The manifestations of this power, when God permits it, constitute the evil days. All this present period of Christ’s absence is, in a certain sense, the evil day. Christ has been rejected by the world, of which, while in it, He was the light, and is hidden in God. This power, which the enemy displayed when he led the world to reject Christ, he still exercises over it: we oppose it by the action and the power of the Holy Ghost, who is here during the Lord’s absence. But there are moments when this power is allowed to shew itself in a more especial manner, when the enemy uses the world against the saints, darkening the light which shines in it from God, troubling and leading astray the minds of professors and even of believers-days, in a word, in which his power makes itself felt. We have to wrestle with this power, to resist it all, to stand against everything in the confession of Christ, of the light; we have to do all that the confession of His name requires in spite of all and at whatever cost, and to be found standing when the storm and the evil day are past.
Thus we have not only to enjoy God and the counsels of God and their effect in peace; but, since these very counsels introduce us into heavenly places and make us the light of God on earth, we have also to encounter the spiritual wickednesses which are in the heavenly places, and which seek to make us falsify our high position, to mislead us, and to darken the light of Christ in us on the earth. We have to escape the snares of heavenly spiritual wickedness for ourselves, and to maintain the testimony here below incorrupt and pure. [28]
Now by the power of the Holy Ghost, who has been given to us for this purpose, we shall find that the armour of God relates first to that which, by setting the flesh aside, and by maintaining the existence of a good conscience, takes all hold from the enemy; then, to the preservation of complete objective trust in God; and next, to the active energy which stands with confidence in the presence of the enemy, and using the weapons of the Holy Ghost against him. The defensive armour our own state, comes first. The whole ends with the expression of the entire and continual dependence on God in which the Christian warrior stands.
We will examine this armour of God, that we may know it. It is all practical-founded on that which has been accomplished, but in itself practical. For it is not a question here of appearing before the bar of God, but of resisting the enemy, and of maintaining our ground against him.
Before God our righteousness is perfect, it is Christ Himself, and we are the righteousness of God in Him: but we do not need armour there, we are sitting in the heavenly places: all is peace, all is perfect. But here we need armour, real practical armour, and first of all to have the loins girt about with truth. The loins are the place of strength when duly girt, but represent the intimate affections and movements of the heart. If we allow our hearts to wander where they will, instead of abiding in communion with God, Satan has easy hold upon us. This piece of armour is then the application of the truth to the most intimate movements, the first movements of the heart. We gird up the loins. This is done, not when Satan is present; it is a work with God, which is done by applying the truth to our souls in His presence, judging everything in us by this means, and putting a bridle on the heart that it may only move under His eye. This is true liberty and true joy, because the new man enjoys God in uninterrupted communion; but here the Spirit speaks of it with respect to the safeguard which it will be to us against the attacks of the enemy. At the same time it is not merely the repression of evil thoughts-that is its consequence: it is the action of the truth, of the power of God, acting by the revelation of everything as it is-of all that He Himself teaches, bringing the conscience into His presence, keeping it thus in His thoughts; all that God has said in His word, and the unseen realities having their true force and their application to the heart that stirs in us, so that its movements should have their character from God’s own word and not from its own desires, everything going on in the presence of God.[29]
Satan has no hold on a heart thus kept in the truth, as revealed by God; there is nothing in its desires that answers to the suggestions of Satan. Take Jesus as an example. His safeguard was not in judging all that Satan said. In the wilderness at the beginning of His public service, except in the last temptation, it was in the perfect application of the word for Himself, for that which concerned His own conduct, to the circumstances around Him. The truth governed His heart, so that it only moved according to that truth in the circumstance that presented itself “Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God.” No word has come forth-He does nothing. There was no motive for acting. It would have been to act of His own accord, of His own will. That truth kept His heart in connection with God in the circumstance that met Him. When the circumstance arose, His heart was already in intercourse with God, so that it had no other impulse than that which the word of truth suggested. His conduct was purely negative, but it flowed from the light which truth threw upon the circumstance, because His heart was under the absolute government of the truth. The suggestion of Satan would have brought Him out of this position. That was enough. He will have nothing to do with it. He does not yet drive away Satan: it was only a matter of conduct, not of flagrant opposition to the glory of God. In the latter case He drives him away; in the former He acts according to God without concerning Himself with anything farther. Satan’s device totally failed of its effect. It simply produced nothing. It is absolutely powerless against the truth, because it is not the truth; and the hearth has truth for its rule. Wiles are not the truth: this is quite enough to prevent our being caught by them, that is, if the heart be thus governed.
In the second place there is the breastplate of righteousness-a conscience that has nothing to reproach itself with. The natural man knows how a bad conscience robs him of strength before men. There is only to be added here the way in which Satan uses it to entrap man in his snares. By maintaining the truth we have Satan for our enemy. If we yield ourselves up to error, he will leave us in that respect at peace, except in using our faults and crimes to enslave us more, to bind us hand and foot in that which is false. How would a man who has the truth, who has perhaps even escaped error, if his conduct were bad, bear to have it exposed to the eyes of all? He is silent before the enemy. His own conscience even will make him silent, if he is upright, without thinking of consequences, unless a confession be necessary. Besides this the strength of God and spiritual understanding will fail him: where could he have gained them in a wrong walk? We go forward boldly when we have a good conscience. But it is when we are walking with God, for the love of God, for the love of righteousness itself, that we have this breastplate on, and thus we are fearless when called to go forward and face the enemy. We gain a good conscience before God by the blood of the Lamb. By walking with God we maintain it before men and for communion with God, in order to have strength and spiritual understanding, and to have them increasingly. This is the practical strength of good conduct, of a conscience without rebuke. “I exercise myself” always to this, said the apostle. What integrity in such a walk, what truthfulness of heart when no eye sees us! We are peremptory with ourselves, with our own hearts, and with regard to our conduct; we can therefore be peaceful in our ways. God also is there. So walk, says the apostle, and the God of peace shall be with you. If the fruits of righteousness are sown in peace, the path of peaceis found in righteousness. If I have a bad conscience, I am vexed with myself, I grow angry with others. When the heart is at peace with God and has nothing to reproach itself with, when the will is held in check, peace reigns in the soul. We walk on the earth, but the heart is above it in intercourse with better things; we walk in a peaceful spirit with others, and nothing troubles our relations with God. He is the God of peace. Peace, the peace of Jesus, fills the heart. The feet are shod with it; we walk in the spirit of peace.
But, together with all this, a piece of defensive armour is needed over all the rest, that we may be able to stand in spite of all the wiles of the enemy-an armour, however, which is practically maintained in its soundness by the use of the preceding ones, so that, if the latter is essential, the others have the first place in practice. This is the shield, faith; that is to say, full and entire trust in God, the consciousness of grace and of His favour maintained in the heart. Here faith is not simply the reception of God’s testimony (although it is founded on that testimony), but the present assurance of the heart with regard to that which God is for us, founded, as we have just said, on the testimony which He has given of Himself-trust in His love and in His faithfulness, as well as in His power. “If our hearts condemn us not, then have we confidence towards God.” The work of the Spirit in us is to inspire this confidence. When it exists, all the attacks of the enemy, who seeks to make us believe that the goodness of God is not so sure-all his efforts to destroy or to weaken in our hearts this confidence in God and to hide Him from us, prove fruitless. His arrows fall to the ground without reaching us. We stand fast in the consciousness that God is for us: our communion is not interrupted. The fiery darts of the enemy are not the desires of the flesh, but spiritual attacks.
Thus we can hold up our heads: moral courage, the energy which goes forward, is maintained. Not that we have anything to boast of in ourselves, but the salvation and the deliverance of God are fresh in our minds. God has been for us; He is for us: who shall be against us? He was for us when we had no strength; it was salvation, when we could do nothing. This is our confidence-God Himself-not looking at ourselves. We have the helmet of salvation on our heads. The former parts of the armour give us freedom to enjoy the two latter.
Thus furnished with that which protects us in our walk, and in the practical confidence in God, and the knowledge of God that flows from it, we are in a state to use offensive weapons. We have but one against the enemy, but it is one that he cannot resist if we know how to handle it: witness the Lord’s conflict in the wilderness with Satan. It is the word of God. There Jesus always answered with the word by the power of the Spirit. It sets man in his true position according to God as obedient man in the circumstances around him. Satan can do nothing there: we have but to maintain that position. If Satan openly tempts us to disobedience, there is no wile in that. Not being able to do anything else, Satan acted thus with the Lord, and manifested himself as he is. The Lord drove him away by the word. Satan has no power when he is manifested as Satan. We have to resist the wiles of the devil. Our business is to act according to the word, come what may; the result will shew that the wisdom of God was in it. But observe here, this sword is the sword of the Spirit. It is not the intelligence or the capacity of man, although it is man who uses the word. His sword is highly tempered, but he can neither draw it nor strike with it if the Holy Ghost is not acting in him. The weapons are spiritual; they are used by the power of the Spirit. God must speak, however weak the instrument may be.
The sword is also used actively in the spiritual warfare, in which it judges all that is opposed to us. In this sense it is both defensive and offensive. But, behind all this armour, there is a state, a disposition, a m eans of strength, which quickens and gives all the rest its power: this is a complete dependence on God, united to trust in Him, which expresses itself in prayer. “Praying always”; this dependence must be constant. When it is real, and I feel that I can do nothing without God, and that He wills my good in all things, it expresses itself. It seeks the strength which it has not: it seeks it from Him in whom it trusts. It is the motion of the Spirit in our hearts in their intercourse with God, so that our battles are fought in the communion of His strength and His favour, and in the consciousness that we can do nothing, and that He is all. “At all times”; “with supplication.” This prayer is the expression of the man’s need, of the heart’s desire, in the strength that the Spirit gives him, as well as in confidence in God. Also since it is the Spirit’s act, it embraces all saints, not one of whom can be forgotten by Jesus; and the Spirit in us answers the affections of Christ, and reproduces them. We must be watchful and diligent in order to use this weapon; avoiding all that would turn us away from God, availing ourselves of every opportunity, and finding, by the grace of the Spirit, in everything that arises, an occasion (by means of this diligence) for prayer and not for distraction. [30] The apostle asks from his heart for this intercession on their part, in the sense of his own need and of that which he desires to be for Christ.
The mission of Tychicus expressed Paul’s assurance of the interest which the love of the Ephesians made them take in having tidings of him, and that which he himself felt in ascertaining their welfare and spiritual state in Christ. It is a touching expression of his confidence in their affection-an affection which his own devoted heart led him to expect in others.
He presents the Ephesians as enjoying the highest privileges in Christ, and as being able to appreciate them. He blames them in nothing. The armour of God-by which to repel the assaults of the enemy, and to grow up in peace unto the Head in all things, the preservative armour of God-was naturally the last thing that he had to set before them. It is to be noticed that he does not speak to them in this epistle of the Lord’s coming. He supposes believers in the heavenly places in Christ; and not as on earth, going through the world, waiting till He should come to take them to Himself, and restore happiness to the world. That which is waited for in this epistle is the gathering together of all things under Christ, their true Head, according to the counsels of God. The blessings are in the heavens, the testimony is in the heavens, the church is sitting in the heavens, the warfare is in the heavens.
The apostle repeats his desire for them of peace, love, and faith; and concludes his epistle with the usual salutation by his own hand.
This epistle sets forth the position and the privileges of the children, and of the assembly in its union with Christ.
Footnotes for Ephesians Chapter 6
28: Still what we have to overcome are the wiles of the devil. His power over us is broken. He may rouse the world in persecution and be a roaring lion; but as regards personal temptations, if we resist the devil he flees from us; he knows he has met Christ, and Christ has overcome. But his wiles are ever there.
29: Girding the loins is a common figure of scripture for a mind and heart kept in godly order as in God’s presence by the word of God.
30: Prayer is founded on the immense privilege of having common interests with God both as to ourselves and as to all that are His, yea, even as to Christ’s glory. Wondrous thought! unspeakable grace!
John Nelson Darby — Synopsis of the Books of the Bible: the New Testament (c. 1857–1862) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Lange's Commentary on the Holy Scriptures 1864 · Public Domain On v1 b. Children and parents
b. Children and parents
Eph_6:1-4
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1,2Children, obey your parents in the Lord:1 for this is right. Honor thy father and [thy]2 mother; which is the first commandment with promise; 3That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. 4And, ye fathers, provoke [or fret] not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture [discipline] and admonition of the Lord.
EXEGETICAL AND CRITICAL
The precept for children; Eph_6:1-3. Eph_6:1. Children, τὰ τέκνα.—The next step from the married state is the family. The wedded pair become parents through God’s gift, which may also be denied. The address to children in a letter to the Church presupposes, that the Apostle regards them as belonging to the Church, present at public worship, understanding the word read to and applicable to them; indeed they must be regarded as baptized, since Eph_6:1 : “in the Lord,” Eph_6:4 : “in the admonition of the Lord,” obliges us to do so (Stier, Hofmann, Schriftbeweis, II., 2, p. 192.)3 See Doctr. Note 1.
Obey your parents in the Lord [ὑπακούετε τοῖς γονεύειν ὑμῶν ἐν κυρίῳ].—The verb coming first has the emphasis: this one precept comprises the main part of filial duty in itself. The word is stronger than ὑποτάσσεσθαι (Bengel: id plus etiam dicit quam subordinamini; obedire est imperitioris: subordinari cujusvis inferioris). To the more mature and experienced persons, who are God’s representatives and the child’s supporters, and guides in fidelity, love and wisdom, obedience is to be rendered, not because they are Christians, or good and rich, or masters over the child, but because they are the parents (“your parents”), with the duty of bringing up (Eph_6:4) as they have brought forth. As Christians the children, however, must obey “in the Lord,” in Christ (Eph_6:10; Eph_6:21; Eph_2:21; Eph_4:1; Eph_4:17; Eph_5:8; Winer, p. 364); analogous to “in the fear of Christ” (Eph_5:21), “as to the Lord” (Eph_5:22). Thus the kind of obedience, not immediately and chiefly the kind of parents, is more closely defined, as specifically Christian in ground, measure and limit. It is incorrect to take it as=κατὰ τοῦ θεοῦ λόγον (Theodoret), or to refer it to God (Calvin), in Deo, or to connect it with “parents,” or to take it as merely a designation of the mode of obedience (Harless).4
For this is right [τοῦτο γάρ ἐστι δίκαιον.—Quickly, briefly Paul presses the proof (γάρ) forward. “This” refers to the whole: the obedience of children to their parents in Christ. In τέκνα and γονεῖς there is a reminder of the μυστήριον (Eph_5:32), which lies in the τόκος and γονεία (Stier). Hence δίκαιον, “right,” refers to the relations both as given in nature and ordained by Divine law. Bengel: etiam natura; Meyer: according to nature and law. This Luther wishes to express with his “it is proper.” It should not be referred to the Divine law alone (Theodoret, Meyer, Schenkel), to which prominence is given in the next verse. [The natural obligation seems to be brought out here, the enforcement through the Divine law is added in the next, verse (so Eadie, Alford, Ellicott, Hodge, following Bengel, Estius and Theophylact).—R.]
Eph_6:2. Honour thy father and thy mother.—This is the commandment, Exo_20:12; Deu_5:16; Mat_15:4. In τίμα there is more included than obedience. Obedientia testimonium est ejus honoris, quem debent parentibus. Sub voce honoris complectitur officia, quibus serio tuam erga parentes observantiam et pietatem sestantur filius (Calvin). In Matthew 15. Jesus deduces from the honor the nourishment, and provision and care. Sir_3:8. Luther: serve, love and esteem. With emphasis the commandment places on an equality over against the children “thy father and thy mother;” in Lev_19:3 the latter even comes first.
Which is, ἤτις ἐστίν, introduces a reason, as in Eph_3:13; it is not=ἥ, quæ, but ut pole quæ.5—The first commandment with promise.—Ἐντολη evidently refers to the Mosaic law, the Decalogue, of which what has just been said is one commandment, hence without the article; on the thought that it is a command of God an emphasis rests,6 which is strengthened by the added phrase: πρώτη ἐν ἐπαγγελία: at first; it is not the first. According to the context it is as respects the time in which it applies to human beings, a first one: children must first honor God’s representatives, in order to learn how and to be able to keep those which precede and follow (Stier). And it is indeed placed on the promise, conceived in promise, because thus the obedience to parents becomes joyful, and upon this obedience salvation actually rests both internally and externally (1Ti_3:1-2). Bengel: Honor parentibus per obedientiam præsertim præstitus initio ætatis omnium præceptorum obedientiam continet. It is not necessary therefore to say that it is in the series of commandments the first with a promise (Harless and others) [see below], as if there were not a promise annexed to the first or second [the Catholic and Lutheran first, our second] (Exodus 20 Eph_6:9-10), or as though it were the first with a promise in the second table (Ambrose and others). It belongs to the first table, and such a distinction is not “a comment of modern theologians, a distinction not founded in the sacred Scriptures “(Erasmus), since it is definitely stated in Deu_5:22, and the tenor of the commandments are distinguished accordingly. (Mat_22:37-40; Lev_19:18; Lev_19:34; Deu_6:5; Deu_10:12.) Least of all does πρώτη mean the most important, a chief commandment (Koppe [Hodge] and others). But while it is incorrect to take ἐν ἐπαγγελία=annexa, addita promissione, it is quite as much so to understand it as=in point of promise (Winer, p. 366; and others).
[The view of Stier, advocated by Braune, is not altogether satisfactory, that of Koppe and Hodge is still less so. Nor is any importance to be attached to the absence of the article with πρώτη. The simplest view, one that usually suggests itself to the children, is that of Harless and Meyer, accepted by Eadie, Alford and Meyer: first in order; in point of, involving a promise, the preposition showing that in which the priority consists. The second commandment has attached simply “a broad declaration of the great principles of the Divine government,” not a specific promise. As regards the difficulty that no commandment follows in the Decalogue with a promise, we may either accept the explanation of Harless that “first” refers only to what precedes in this case, or that of Meyer, which finds the rest of the series in other Mosaic commands (so Ellicott).—R.]
Eph_6:3. That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.—This is the purport of the promise. Exo_20:12; Deu_5:16; LXX.: ἵνα εὖ σοι γένηται καὶ ἵνα μακροχρόνιος γένη ἐπὶ τῆς γῆς, ἦς ὁ κύριος ὁ θεός σου δίδωσί σοι. The Apostle only alters: καὶ ἔση μακροχρόνιος, omitting the last relative clause, which as a commandment of God designates, not merely Canaan, but every country appointed by Him as a home, Palestine in the case of the Jews. According to the quotation ἵνα must be retained in the second half with the future, although the conjunctive occurs in the first half. Winer (p. 271) explains the construction with the future as a lapse into a direct discourse, despite similar examples. Meyer finds indicated in the conjunctive the mere actualization, in the future the certain entrance and continuance, hence a logical climax.7 Undoubtedly ἵνα is to be taken as telic, and on account of the phrase, “thy father and thy mother,” to be applied to individuals, not toti eorum genti (Bengel, who prudently says beforehand: non tantum singulis; Harless and others). The well being is put in the front rank, the long life in the second. Even among the most decayed people it will go well with him who honors his parents in obedience, and his life will be long, at least quoad sufficientiam for eternal salvation (Stier). Godliness has indeed a promise for this life also (1Ti_4:8), but certainly for that which is to come. To limit the promise to the spiritual possessions of the heavenly Canaan (Jerome, Olshausen) is incorrect, Tenerior ætas pro captu suo allicitur promissione longæ, vitæ (Bengel). The attracting promise is chiefly to be taken in the sense and spirit of children, who hope for a long life; the history of nations and families confirm the truth of the promise. Hodie æque bene vivunt pii in omne terra, atque Israel olim in illa (Bengel).
[We must reject both the generalizing and spiritualizing interpretations of the promise, and accept an individual reference of present validity. On this most recent commentators agree. And the promise is fulfilled in the usual course of providence with obedient children. The only question is: Did the Apostle by omitting the latter part of the commandment, which had a special reference to Canaan, himself apply the promise to obedient children in all lands, or did the original commandment imply this (the given land being the home in every case), so that the Apostle omits the last clause as unessential for his present purpose and really implied, τὴς γῆς? The former is the view of Eadie, Alford, Ellicott, and Hodge, the latter of Braune and others. Either is preferable to Meyer’s notion that the Apostle omitted the clause because his readers were familiar with the passage, and understood it in the general sense, though its original reference was only to Palestine.—R.]
The precept for fathers; Eph_6:4. And ye fathers.—Quickly and closely he connects this with καί.8 He addresses the “fathers,” because he regards the mothers as “submitting to their own husbands” (Eph_5:22; Eph_5:24; Eph_5:33), who are their responsible representatives. Facilius parentes et heri abutuntur potestate sua, quam mariti (Bengel); that lies in the freer position of the former. We are not to refer this to grown up children (Olshausen), since “bring them up” follows; nor is there any oriental depreciation of the mother (Rueckert), since Eph_6:2 commands: “honor thy mother,” and Gen_24:67; Gen_37:10; 1Ki_2:19; Jdg_5:7; 2Sa_20:19 teach us otherwise.9
The prohibition: Provoke [or fret] not your children to wrath, μὴ παροργίζετε τὰ τέκνα ὑμῶν.—It is parallel to the παραζηλοῦν, Rom_10:19; it is explained by Col_3:21 (א.: παροργίζετε, others: ἐρεθίζετε—ἵνα μὴ ἀθυμῶσιν). It is the hasty, rough, moody treatment of children, so that, without childish confidence, without joyful obedience, they are repelled and enticed to opposition, defiance and bitterness. Righteous, wholesome parental anger is not excluded, but painful, arbitrary, grumbling treatment, as well as rough, unjust treatment, without sparing the childish nature. [Alford: “The Apostle seems to allude to provoking by vexatious commands and unreasonable blame, and uncertain temper, in ordinary intercourse.”—R.]
The command: But bring them up, ἀλλὰ ἐκτρέφετε αὐτά (Eph_5:29).—This points to children who still require care. But it should not be the mere growing up of the proletarians, but spiritual also. Hence:
In the discipline and admonition of the Lord, ἐν παιδεία καὶ νουθεσίᾳ κυρίου. Thus the element is denoted in which the bringing up should be consummated.10 The former consists in work, the latter in word; the former is discipline (Luther), not merely punishment, also strict ordering of the household, accustoming to self-denial, serviceableness, confession of faults without shuffling. Heb_12:6-7. The latter (Luther: admonition) comprises earnest warning (1Co_10:11) and kind exhortation (Tit_3:10; Rom_15:14; Col_3:16; Col_1:28; 1Co_4:14; 1Th_5:14; 2Th_3:15), which evidently predominates over serious rebukes. It is important that the former comes first, and this last. Harum altera occurrit ruditati, altera oblivioni et levitati; utraque et sermonem et reliquiam disciplinam includit (Bengel). [Comp. Trench, Syn. § XXXII, whose views correspond in the main with those suggested here, and are adopted by Eadie, Alford and Ellicott.—R.] Hence the first is not general, the training of children in general, the latter special, the reproof for the purpose of improvement (Harless, Meyer), nor are they indistinguishable synonyms (Koppe). The genitive belongs to both words: the Lord does it through the father as His representative; it is therefore a genitive subjecti. [So Harless, De Wette, Meyer, Eadie, Hodge, Alford, Ellicott and others: the discipline and admonition prescribed by the Lord and to be regulated by His Spirit.—R.] It is not then: to the Lord (Luther), nor=well-pleasing to the Lord (Flatt), or=de Christo (Michaelis), nor are we to accept that the Apostle himself scarcely knew how to explain it (Rueckert).
DOCTRINAL AND ETHICAL
1. The presupposition for the conduct of children to parents and parents to children is the relation of both to Christ. The children should do their duty “in the Lord” (Eph_6:1), the parents “in the discipline and admonition of the Lord” (Eph_6:4), and that too from infancy (“bring them up”). Baptism, infant baptism, is thus presupposed as the basis for the children as well as for the treatment of children. And all the more so, that there is expressed for the children no termination or cessation of their conduct toward their parents and for the parents no beginning of the influence on the children, nor is any hint given of the baptismal act to be effected or experienced, which could scarcely be wanted after Eph_4:5 (“one baptism”), since the fellowship of the Lord is indicated in the case of children as well as parents. Hofmann (Schriftbeweis, II., 2, p. 193) properly recalls Act_16:15. For before mention was made of the household of the jailer, and without any impression of what had occurred having been made upon his household, it was said to him: “Believe in the Lord Jesus Christ and thou shalt be saved, and thy house.” We should therefore with Augustine (De Gen. X., 23, Serm. X) and Origen (ad Rom. vi.) regard infant baptism as an ordinance instituted by the Apostles. It was practised in the days of Tertullian, but no mention is made of its having been introduced. Accordingly our passage refers the nurture of children to the basis of baptism and the family: family education and baptismal education are enjoined. [The relation to Christ rests not on the baptismal act, but on the relation to the believing parents, hence children are to be baptized “as members of Christ’s Church” (Ref. Church, form of baptism), are thus publicly acknowledged and sealed as Christian children, whose personal piety is to be looked for in faith just, as it is prayed for in faith. Despite all abuse of this Christian truth, it is the truth, and holding it fast we may hope for a piety which rests on an educational, not a spasmodic, basis.—In regard to the apostolic origin of the ordinance, the negative proof is overwhelming. Besides the allusion here and in Acts 16, it is inconceivable that the Jews, who attacked Paul on every actual point of difference, could have omitted opposition here, had he failed to perpetuate in some distinct form the Old Testament doctrine of covenant blessings on the household.—But as negative proof it leaves room for honest adherence to that marked individualistic form of Christianity, which is necessary, it would seem, for many minds of that cast.—R.]
2. The Apostle requires obedience on the part of the children to their parents as God’s representatives. This is a manifestation of that honor which God requires. It is established, regulated and limited through Christ, and is the foundation of earthly happiness. While ὑπακούειν denotes obedience as a reverent hearing, listening to the parents’ will, not merely in order to know it, but rather to be directed by it, so the German word: gehorchen [derived from horchen=our English hearken], related to hörig, gehörig, zugehörig [all meaning: belonging to, but strengthened in the longer forms], refers to the internal relation of dependence which finds its answering expression in gehorsam [obedience]. Both refer to the relation of piety [i.e., filial piety, since piety toward God and parents are recognized as identical in the Latin word pius], and include as the innermost motive love, which devotes itself with recognition of the parental dignity, even when parental worthiness is wanting. Over against the will of the parents the will of the child is illegal; but this statement is valid only so far as the parents exercise their will as the representatives of God, and their will is not opposed to God’s will. In this there is a hint that the Fifth Commandment belongs to the first table (Braune, Die heil. 10 Geb. pp. 85–88). This requirement, to agree to the will of parents, does not cease in the course of years, though it receives limitations from the avocation and position of the children, as in the case of our Lord (Joh_2:4)
3. The blessing of the Fifth Commandment points to this fact, that in God’s world and God’s government His law, which is in accordance with the whole as well as with each individual part, is and must be of validity, and because it is valid for life, is given in correspondence with the ordinances of His Creation and Providence. The blessing is not an arbitrarily placed reward, but a result of obedience, actual and true obedience. One cannot creep into the blessing through constrained or feigned obedience. Obedience, this deeply rooted act of a will, growing morally, is not an affair of selfish calculation, still less can an immoral or demoralizing observance of a natural law be spoken of. Nor is the blessing promised for the life of the earthly family and people to be so lightly esteemed, that it must be transferred to the inheritance of the heavenly Canaan. Welfare and long life will be constantly regarded and used by the Christian as a gift of the gracious God; if something is lacking, he will never murmur nor doubt, as if God did not keep His promise, since our obedience of His commandment is never so perfect that it can be brought into an account with Him; it is rather the case that He has always vouchsafed and still vouchsafes to us more than we deserve.
4. Christian education must be consummated in the family, and if the family, in which children are born, is broken up by death, or destroyed by social, individual or sinful relations, and made incapable of fulfilling the task of education, each child should still be transferred to a family, or every institution which undertakes the task must be formed as a family.—Christian nurture must begin with the earliest childhood, with the beginning of the child’s life (ἐκτρέφετε). On this account ἐν παιδεία comes first, and νουθεσία follows. Matters pertaining to the ordering of the household, to habitudes, to treatment without speaking, even to punishment, come first. Comp Heb_12:6; Pro_3:11-12; Pro_22:15; Pro_23:13.—But it must add to this and pass over into admonition by word, both alike “of Christ,” not in self-will, but under the Lord to whom we are responsible. Hence this education must be Christian.11—Further it connects itself with baptism; hence it is Churchly. Comp. Von Zeschwitz, System der Christlich Kirchlichen Katechetik, II. 1, §2. [More Christian than Churchly however. Hence in those lands where the Church as such must needs control education, there is little gain for the Church or for Christ. Were the family instruction what it ought to be, there is no fear of children becoming irreligious from attending common schools (i.e., schools of the State, not of the Church).—The question of Sunday Schools ought to be far oftener studied in the light of this section.—R.]—The mother is not excluded, but only subordinated to the father (Eph_6:2; Eph_6:4). The mother’s influence on the formation of character is quiet and deep, reaching both to the tenderest germs and the profoundest depths of the heart. 2Ti_1:5.—Finally the individuality of the child must be well considered, and one not be treated as another. Such a difficult task can be performed only in the strength of the Lord, by whom we are ourselves educated.
HOMILETICAL AND PRACTICAL
Comp. Doctr. Notes and Braune, Die heiligen 10 Gebote, pp. 84–106.—True obedience is so difficult, that it becomes possible only to the Christian child in the strength of the developed baptismal grace; not the natural, only the spiritual man is capable of proper obedience and becomes more and more so. On the other hand Christian training is so difficult, that only Christian parents can grant it, and this too without having learned the art, often without being conscious of it.—By the child’s cradle you still humbly look up to God; you cannot boast that you have given the child life; must indeed confess that you have imparted sin to them.—Eve preferred her first-born Cain (==weapon) to Abel (=shadow, nothingness).—Be sparing of words in your discipline; let your children obey without asking why and punish rather before than after five years of age, else they will punish you.
Starke: God joins certain promises to His commandments, that we may be the more willing to live in accordance with them. If obedient children have a promise, disobedient ones have a threatening.—The training of children is an art not easily learned. Parents, you must study this, that you may learn it, and implore this grace from God; but especially must you be watchful over all your own conduct, that you give no bad example to your children; and above all implant the true fear of God in their hearts.—If parents bring up their children to the glory of God and the advantage of the world, that is more and better than to leave them great earthly treasures.
Rieger: The phrase: in the Lord, leads us to perceive that they must be chiefly guided and impelled therein by God’s commandment, the walk of the Lord Jesus on the earth; the hope of future recompense from the Lord; but also that it sometimes requires courage to be obedient in all things, and for the Lord’s sake to rise above even the parents who stand in the way.—It is often asked how shall we encourage and incite children to their duty? and it is generally thought that the love of honor and the excitement of this feeling are the best means. But he who in accordance with God’s word meets their sense of truth with this thought: for this is right, proceeds far more securely. There is often in children a far purer feeling than we suppose, we frequently corrupt it by presenting so many frivolous motives.—With the power of self-will love, would never suffice for constant obedience, did it not derive support from reverence.—All promises of God must however be treated believingly, i.e., humbly, for they allow nothing to be extorted from them. Provoking to wrath takes place not only through unmerciful beating, but also through other unskilful treatment, even though it often has the appearance of right.—God has Himself given us the best pattern of “bringing up.” At first without the sharp condemnation of sin designed in the law He led men by His eye and kept them walking before Him. After the stricter imputation of sin through the law, He guided them through His grace in Christ.
Heubner: The forbearance, the mildness, the fairness towards children, which Paul enjoins, consists in this, that one neither unmercifully punishes them on account of faults and infirmities, nor teases them with their education and conversion, but leads them with love and earnestness, removing hindrances, and for the rest commending them to the care of the Lord, who loves children. The child has not yet a very lively sense of sin, hence you must not overdo this matter of conversion.—Thus much is certain: religious culture should begin early; the child’s heart can be early won and be influenced by love to Jesus. This is the spirit of Christian nurture, which proceeds without constraint and cannot play much with dogmatics.
Passavant: How difficult for a child’s heart is child-like obedience! for all are sinners, and in all sin there is self-desire, self-will, opposition.—Ill-bred children rarely become good subjects to the king, good citizens for the State, good brethren, good friends, or good parents to their children.
Stier: The obedience of children is due according to natural and revealed right.—The first school of obedience for man is his relation as child.—The mother’s love must compensate when the father’s character inclines to severity; the father’s earnestness and strictness must step in where the mother’s natural tenderness is insufficient.
Schleiermacher: The nature of filial obedience: 1. From what it should arise: neither hold out rewards, nor threaten punishments; nor gratify froward asking for reasons; solely out of filial respect. 2. On what grounds it is recommended: citing the old promise.
Anacker: To what education must be directed, that it may bear fruit for time and eternity. 1. That the youth learn proper obedience; 2. That they are led through love to obedience; 3. That mildness and strictness be rooted in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Hofmann: The personal work of the parents: anger their greatest hindrance; their surest means: nurture your children into the Lord.—The nurture of the Lord: The fundamental traits and principles of Divine training, presented in the history of salvation from the beginning of our race on and in the conversion of individuals through the training of the Holy Ghost; some applications thence to our training: doing acts of love, blessing (Meyer), preserving from ungodly influences, promising, punishing.—Admonition of the Lord: reminder that Christ should be glorified in the children and that they should become happy men, skilful warriors of God.
Zimmermann: From what you seek in your children, measure what you owe to them! 1. You desire obedience from them, show yourselves full of love to them. 2. You desire that they honor you, apply to them the right nurture. 3. You desire that they protect and adorn your old age, so help them to inherit the promise: that it may be well with thee and that thou mayest live long on the earth.
[Hodge: Children should obey their parents. This obedience should be in the Lord, determined and regulated by a regard to Christ. The ground of the obligation is: 1. It is in itself right; it is enforced by an express command in the Decalogue, to which a special promise is annexed, Eph_6:1-3.
Eph_6:4. A parent had better sow tares in a field from which he expects to derive food for himself and family, than by his own ill-conduct nurture evil in the heart of a child.—R.]
[Eadie: Eph_6:1. The love which Jesus showed to children, when He took them in His arms and blessed them, should induce them, in a spirit of filial faith and fondness to obey their parents, and to regard with special sacredness every parental injunction. And that obedience, if prompted, regulated, and bounded by a sense of religious obligation, will be cheerful, and not sullen; prompt, and not dilatory; uniform, and not occasional; universal, and not capricious in its choice of parental precepts.—Filial obedience, under God’s blessing, prolongs life, for it implies the possession of principles of restraint, sobriety, and industry, which secure a lengthened existence.
Eph_6:4. Such training leads to early piety, and such is ever welcome to Christ and His Church. For the sun shining on a shrub, in its green youth, is a more gladsome spectacle than the evening beam falling dimly on the ivy and ruins of an old and solitary tower.—R.]
[While Eph_6:4 does not mean (see Exeg. Notes) instruction and admonition concerning Christ, it is still true that a father, who, by proper discipline tempered with love, ever keeps the heart of his children in intimate and trustful allegiance, by his very demeanor teaches lessons concerning Christ and God, that are rarely learned so easily in other ways. Many a son is kept from utter ruin by remembering a mother’s love and piety, but happy is he who has had such a father as Paul here sketches in bold outline, for amid every doubt that assails head and heart alike, the reality of that father is an evidence, in kind though not in degree, of what God is to us, which no speculations can overbear.—R.]
Footnotes:
[1] Eph_6:1.—[Lachmann, Rueckert, and Mill omit ἐν κυρίῳ on the authority of B. D.1 F., some fathers. It is bracketted by Alford; but Harless, Meyer, Ellicott accept it on the strong support of א. A. D. 2 3 K. L., nearly all cursives and versions, express statement of Chrysostom; especially since, as Meyer urges, we would have found ὡς τῷ κυρίῶ in case of an insertion from Eph_5:22, and if from Col_3:20, it would have been placed after δίκαιον. Braune’s note here speaks of the absence of the phrase in Col_3:20, a manifest error.—R.]
[2]Eph_6:2.—[The E. V. omits “thy,” without reason and unfortunately, for the article occurs in the Greek, and the same emphasis rests on thy mother as on thy father.—R.]
[3][To this Meyer objects, but in its stead lays down a principle which approaches the strict Reformed view: “The children of Christians through their vital fellowship with their Christian parents were even without baptism ἅγιοι (see 1Co_7:14; Act_16:15) and should render to their parents obedience ἐν κυρίῳ.”—R.]
[4][Hodge seems to follow Harless but Eadie, Ellicott, Alford rightly take ἐν κυρίῳ as indicating the sphere or element of the action. Alford adds, in reference to the common view that the Apostle gives a hint as to commands not according to the will of God: “I should rather believe, that he regards both parents and children as ἐν κυρίῳ, and the commands, as well as the obedience, as having that sphere and element. How children were to regard commands not answering to this description, would be understood from the nature of the case.” Certainly, if the reference be, as is thought by most, to baptized children, then this presupposes the parents ruling “in the Lord.” On the limits of obedience, Ellicott refers to Taylor, Duct. Dub. III. 5, Rule 1 and 4 ff.—R.]
[5][This is the view of Meyer and formerly of Ellicott, but the latter now accepts the explanatory force of the pronoun, since, as Alford intimates, the other view throws “the motive to obedience too much on the fact of the promise accompanying it, whereas the obedience rests on the fact implied in ἐντολή, and the promise comes in to show its special acceptableness to God.”—R.]
[6][Alford’s remark in loco must be taken with caution. He says the reference is to “the Decalogue, which naturally stands at the head of all God’s other commandments; and which, though not formally binding on us as Christians, is quoted, in matters of eternal obligation (not of positive enactment), as an eminent example of God’s holy will.”—R.]
[7][On this Ellicott remarks: “The future undoubtedly often does express the more lasting and certain result (comp. Rev_22:14, where the single act is expressed by the aorist subj., the lasting act by the future); still as the present formula occurs in substance in Deu_22:7 (Alexand.), and might have thence become a known form of expression, it seems better not to press the future further than as representing the temporal evolution of the εὖ γενέσθαι.”—R.]
[8][Ellicott suggests that the particle “marks that obligation was not all on one side, but that the superior also had duties which he owed to the inferior.”—R.]
[9][Eadie limits this precept to fathers, urging that mothers are apt to spoil the child by indulgence, while fathers are apt to chastise in a passion. But the other view is preferable.—R.]
[10][Dr. Hodge, whose comments on this verse are very clear and instructive, falls into his usual error, in taking the preposition ἐν as instrumental: “developing all their powers by the instruction and admonition of the Lord.” The thought is rather that the child shall grow up, be trained in an element, sphere, atmosphere, etc.—R.]
[11][Hodge: “As Christianity is the only true religion, and God in Christ the only true God, the only profitable education is the nurture and admonition of the Lord. That is, the whole process of instruction and discipline must be that which He prescribes and which He administers, so that His authority should be brought into constant and immediate contact with the mind, heart and conscience of the child. It will not do for the parent to present himself as the ultimate end, the source of knowledge and possessor of authority to determine truth and duty. This would be to give his child a mere human development. Nor will it do for him to urge and communicate everything on the abstract ground of reason; for that would be to merge his child in nature. It is only by making God, God in Christ, the teacher and ruler, on whose authority everything is to be believed, and in obedience to whose will everything is to be done, that the ends of education can possibly be attained.” But it must still be maintained, that the place where this close contact with Christ as Ruler and Teacher and Saviour is to be brought about is not the school, whether parochial school or Sunday School, but as a rule the household, since the command is addressed to “fathers,” who, standing in loco Dei in the family, should not too readily abdicate from their responsible position.—R.]
Lange's Commentary on the Holy Scriptures (Critical, Doctrinal, and Homiletical), ed. John Peter Lange, English translation edited by Philip Schaff (1864–1880) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Robert Jamieson, A. R. Fausset & David Brown 1871 · Public Domain On vv2–3 Here the authority of revealed law is added to…
Here the authority of revealed law is added to that of natural law.
which is . . . promise--The "promise" is not made the main motive to obedience, but an incidental one. The main motive is, because it is God's will (Deu 5:16, "Honor thy father and mother, as the Lord thy God hath COMMANDED thee"); and that it is so peculiarly, is shown by His accompanying it "with a promise."
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first--in the decalogue with a special promise. The promise in the second commandment is a general one. Their duty is more expressly prescribed to children than to parents; for love descends rather than ascends [BENGEL]. This verse proves the law in the Old Testament is not abolished.
Jamieson, Fausset & Brown — Commentary Critical and Explanatory on the Whole Bible (1871) — public domain (CC PDM 1.0). Text via the HelloAO Bible API.
Daniel D. Whedon 1874 · Public Domain On vv1–3 b. Children and Parents, Eph_6:1-4.
b. Children and Parents, Eph_6:1-4.
1. Children—Direct address to children as to the other relations; as if even the child should hear the apostolic voice and obey in it the divine command.
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In the Lord—Qualifying obey, and implying that their obedience was, like every Christian character, embodied in Christ, who is the embodiment of man’s duty and God’s mercy.
This is right—There is a natural and fundamental rightness in this obedience. The parents are authors of your being; they furnish you with livelihood and bringing up, they are your representatives to the world, responsible for your good behaviour and well being. It is right, therefore, that for the proper discharge of those responsibilities you should submit your inferior judgments and wills to theirs. But this natural law is sanctioned by the divine law. The apostle quotes, without any words of introduction, the fifth commandment of the decalogue, assuming that all recognise the words.
For the same reason he is free to vary the verbal form.
Daniel D. Whedon (gen. ed.), Commentary on the Old and New Testaments (1874–1909) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
The Cambridge Bible for Schools and Colleges 1878 · Public Domain On vv1–3 Ch. Eph_6:1-4. The Christian Home: Children and Parents
Ch. Eph_6:1-4. The Christian Home: Children and Parents
1. Children] Cp. Col_3:20.
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obey] The Gr. word differs from that rendered “submit yourselves” (Eph_6:22). It is the same as that below, Eph_6:5, rendered “be obedient.” The child, and the bondservant, are to render an obedience (so the words seem to indicate) different in kind from that of the wife, which is so largely tempered by equality in other respects.
“Disobedience to parents” (Rom_1:30; 2Ti_3:2) appears in Scripture as a symptom of a state of the gravest evil. The example of the Lord stands in sacred contrast to it, for all ages of the Church (Luk_2:51). It is in the school of the well-ordered Christian home that the true idea of the Christian’s position, divinely filial in its freedom, yet (1Co_9:21) “law-abiding unto Christ,” should be first illustrated as well as taught.
parents] Mothers as well as fathers (see next verse). Scripture uniformly upholds the authority of the mother. Cp. Pro_1:8; Pro_6:20.
in the Lord] I.e., let your obedience be in Him; rendered as by those whose action gets its reason and secret from union with Him. No doubt the Apostle assumes here a family in which the parents are Christians; but he certainly would not limit the precept to such a case, as it would be limited if “your parents in the Lord” was the verbal connexion.
In the case of Christian parentage, the children, as such, would certainly be reckoned as within the covenant, and, in this sense, “in the Lord.” Cp. 1Co_7:14 (“now are the children holy”). It would be for their own consciences before God, none the less, to ask whether they were also “in Christ” in that inner and ultimate sense which is, spiritually, “new creation” (2Co_5:17).
There is some evidence, but quite inadequate, for the omission of the words “in the Lord.”
right] Just; not merely beautiful, or better, but according to the Law of God, both in Nature and in Revelation.
The Apostle does not deal here with the limits of filial obedience in cases where the Divine Will crosses the parental will. He has the great rule and principle wholly in view.
The Cambridge Bible for Schools and Colleges (gen. ed. J. J. S. Perowne; Cambridge University Press, 1878–1918) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Ellicott's Commentary for English Readers 1878 · Public Domain On vv1–3 (1) In Eph_6:10-17. St. Paul sums up his practical…
(1) In Eph_6:10-17. St. Paul sums up his practical exhortation in that magnificent description which has ever since laid hold of Christian imagination, both in metaphor and in allegory. He paints the Christian life as a battle against spiritual powers of evil, waged in the strength of the Lord, and in the panoply of God. We trace the germ of this great passage first in St. Paul’s earliest Epistle (1Th_5:8-9), and then in the later Epistle to the Romans (Rom_13:12). In both these cases the image is of soldiers starting from sleep at day-break to arm for the fray in the morning light. But it is characteristic of the more elaborate and thoughtful style of this Epistle, and of the circumstances under which it was written (in the watchful presence of the full-armed Roman “soldiers that kept” St. Paul), that the image there briefly touched is here worked out in full beauty of detail.
VI.
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(4 b.) In Eph_6:1-4. St. Paul passes from the detailed exposition of the true relation of husbands and wives, to deal with the relation of parents and children, far more cursorily and simply, but under the light of the same idea. It is to be thought of as existing “in the Lord,” i.e., within the unity binding all to Christ, in virtue of which the parental authority and the right freedom of the child are both hallowed.
(1) In the Lord.—The phrase itself, though familiar in St. Paul’s writings generally, is specially frequent in the Epistles of the Captivity, where it occurs in various connections no less than twenty-one times. (See, for example, Eph_2:21; Eph_3:11; Eph_4:1; Eph_4:17; Eph_5:8; Eph_6:10; Eph_6:21.) It is, in fact, a brief indication of their great subject—unity with and in Christ. Here to “obey in the Lord” is to obey under the light and grace of that unity, as already belonging both to parents and children, and transfiguring all natural relations to a diviner glory.
This is right.—Right, i.e., by fundamental laws of humanity, recognised in all races and all ages, declared and sanctioned in God’s commandments (Eph_6:2-3), which are at once both old and new “in the Lord.”
A Bible Commentary for English Readers, edited by Charles John Ellicott (1878–1897) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
The Pulpit Commentary 1880 · Public Domain On vv1–3 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this…
Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. The first duty of children is obedience, and "in the Lord," i.e. in Christ, this duty is confirmed. The ejn Kuriw qualifies, not "parents," but "obey," and indicates that the element or life which even children lead in fellowship with Christ makes such obedience more easy and more graceful. The duty itself rests on the first principles of morality this is right." It is an obligation that rests on the very nature of things, and cannot change with the spirit of the age; it is in no degree modified by what is called the spirit of independence in children.
Vers. 1-4.
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Duties of children and parents.
It must have been an interesting day in the Church of Ephesus when it was known that a pastoral letter would be read in the public assembly from the beloved and venerable apostle whose labors had been attended with such a blessing. Whether the meeting was held in early morning or late in the evening, every effort would be made by every Christian to be present, and even as they were walking towards the place of meeting, a certain briskness of manner and eagerness of expression would show that something beyond the common was in expectation. Those who had to pass the great temple of Diana would cast no lingering look behind, nor think of the contrast between that magnificent shrine of idolatry and the very humble building where the true God was worshipped, by whom all things were made. Even the children would not linger to peep at the gorgeous glory of the temple, for their parents would have told them that at their meeting a letter was going to be read from the great apostle, now unable to come to them because wicked men had imprisoned him, but still remembering them all, as his letter would show. Remembering the interest which, like his Master, the apostle had taken in the young, it would be an interesting question whether the letter to be read would not contain some passage for them, and, if it did, what would be its tenor? Perhaps the most attentive of them would be beginning to feel weary as five-sixths of the letter was read, but no word yet for them. But at last the message comes; and when it comes it appears that it is not only about them, but addressed to them; the apostle looks them full in the face, and says, "Children." And when the children"s morsel is brought out, it is perhaps not quite what they expected. It is not a sugared morsel, nor is it particularly affectionate in its terms. It is not a nice little story or a poetical allegory, carrying them to the realms of dreamland; it is just a simple, practical requirements" Children, obey your parents in the Lord." Possibly even the older hearers were rather surprised, and certainly there are many now who would have expected a more spiritual counsel. They would have expected him to say something to the children about Jesus, or about prayer, or about trying to teach the heathen around them; hut he speaks on none of these things. He probably counted that, if the children were right with their parents, other things would follow; if they obeyed their parents, and their parents brought them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, God"s blessing would rest on their efforts and all would be well. But if the apostle did not speak to children in the modern fashion, it is all the more important to notice and ponder the message which he actually gives them.
I DUTY OF CHILDREN.
1. To obey.
1. To honor their parents. The reasons are
1. it is right;
2. it is a commandment;
3. it is the first of the commandments with a promise;
4. that promise gives expectation of long life and prosperity.
In one of the best books of the early Church, written by one of its greatest men Confessions" of St. Augustine there is a chapter in which he humbly confesses his disobedience as a boy, in neglecting his lessons, and going to see games and sights in opposition to the wishes of his parents. Long after, when he came to be a Christian, the thought haunted and distressed him until, confessing it, and laying it on Jesus, he obtained the mercy and forgiveness of God. Long life among the Jews was a token of the Divine favor, and it seems to have been an emblem of the life to come. We need not count in all cases on a literal fulfillment of the Jewish promise; but we may rest assured that a spirit of honor to our parents tends to make our earthly lot better and brighter, and will have some recognition likewise in the life that is to come.
II DUTY OF PARENTS.
1. Negatively. Not to provoke or irritate their children. But:
2. Positively, to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. In the Old Testament, Samuel, and in the New Testament, Timothy, are samples of children so brought up. The Lord"s command is, "Bring up this child for me, and I will pay thee thy wages." What infinitely precious results depend on the execution of these two precepts! Every well-trained Christian household is a nursery of all that tends to bless the world; while disorderly and unchristian families are hotbeds of vice and evil. The prayer of the hundred and forty-fourth psalm is never out of date: That our sons may be as plants grown up in their youth; our daughters as cornerstones, polished after the similitude of a palace.... Happy is that people that is in such a case; yea, happy is that people whose God is the Lord.
HOMILIES BY T. CROSKERY.
Vers. 1-3.
The duties of children to parents.
There is a beautiful and appropriate simplicity in the counsel here addressed to children. Their duties are founded in nature. They derive their being from their parents; they are fed by them; they are trained by them for the duties of life.
I THEIR DUTY IS SUMMED UP IN THE ONE WORD "OBEDIENCE." But it includes four important elements.
1. Love. This is an instinctive feeling, but it is not the less a commanded duty, for it is the spring of all hearty obedience. It makes obedience easy. Yet we are not to love our parents more than the Lord; we are rather to love them in the Lord.
2. Honor. This is only another form of obedience: "Honor thy father and thy mother." Children are never to set light by their parents; (Deu_27:17) "A son honoureth his father"; (Mal_1:6) "Thou shalt rise up before the hoary head, and honor the face of the old. (Lev_19:32) God has, indeed, given his own honor to parents. We may not always be called to obey them, but we are always to honor them. "Hearken unto thy father that begat thee, and despise not thy mother when she is old". (Pro_23:22) This honor is allied to reverence: "We have had fathers of our flesh who corrected us, and we gave them reverence". (Heb_12:9)
1. Gratitude. It is our duty to requite our parents, (1Ti_5:4) and our Lord implies that we are to do them good. (Mat_15:4) We ought to remember their love, their care, their concern for us. Joseph provided for his father Jacob in old age, and the women said to Naomi of Boaz, "He shall be unto thee a restorer of thy life, and a nourisher of thine old age.
2. Subjection. "Children, obey your parents in all things;" that is, in all things falling within the sphere of a parent"s authority. If parents command their children to steal, or lie, or commit idolatry, they are not to be obeyed. They are to be obeyed "in the Lord." There are several reasons to make obedience natural.
(1) Parents know more than their children; therefore "a wise son heareth his father"s instruction". (Pro_13:1) The child must take much of his knowledge for granted on the mere authority of his father.
(2) The habit of obedience is good as a discipline. It is even good for the health of a child, as a desultory and dawdling obedience breaks its temper and injures its health.
(3) Children are not able to guide themselves; for "folly is bound up in the heart of a child". (Pro_22:15)
(4) Society is benefited by the due subordination of family life.
II THE REASON OF OBEDIENCE ASSIGNED IN THIS PASSAGE IS SIMPLY "FOR THIS IS RIGHT." It is right
(1) according to the light of nature;
(2) according to the Law of God. "It is well-pleasing unto the Lord. (Col_3:20)
It is embodied in the Decalogue, and holds the first place among the duties of the second table, and "is the first commandment with promise the promise of a long life. This implies
(1) that the fifth commandment is still binding on the Christians of this dispensation;
(2) that long life is to be desired;
(3) that disobedience to parents tends to shorten life. There may be undutiful children who live to old age, and dutiful children who die young, but the promise abides in its general purpose. It is like the saying, "The hand of the diligent maketh rich," yet diligent persons have felt the bitterness of poverty. Children are therefore justified in having regard firstly to the command of God, and then to the recompense of the reward. T.C.
HOMILIES BY R.M. EDGAR Vers. 1-4.
Christian nurture.
Having shown how Christ sanctifies the marriage union and gives to husbands the ideal of devotion, the apostle proceeds in the present section to show the relation which should exist between children and parents. He directs children to the fifth commandment and to the promise it contains, and he calls upon fathers to afford their children Christian nurture in place of provocation. The section suggests
I PARENTAL QUALIFICATIONS. And here we fall back upon the previous section. It is when husbands and wives are related as Christ is to the Church, when self-sacrificing love is met by reverential obedience, that the parents are qualified to train up the children. It is surely significant also that upon the father the burden of the nurture is laid. For he is in danger of provoking the children by severity, and so is not naturally so sympathetic as the mother. Besides, if the Christian father keep Christ before him as his great Ideal, then the Divine fatherhood regulates his conscience and he nurtures the little ones accordingly.
II THE NURTURE ITSELF. The children are not to be provoked, but" nurtured in the chastening and admonition of the Lord" (Revised Version). The former of these words (paideia) might mean, as Harless suggests, "education in general" (allgemeine Begriff); but it is better to restrict it to the discipline, made up of order and of act, under which the children grow, while the latter word (nouqesia) will indicate education by word. "The same spirit," says Monod, in loco, "which in our day relaxes filial obedience, softens paternal power; the abuse of independence among inferiors and the forgetfulness of authority among superiors, march hand-in-hand. Parents who have known how to guard themselves against an excessive rigor, whether as a matter of principle or of temperament, fall usually into the contrary excess; chastisement is banished from their household, and as for corporal punishment in particular, it is held most frequently for a mark of a hard heart or of a base-born spirit. Let us oppose to these prejudices Pro_13:24 Pro_22:15 Pro_23:13, 14 29:17. By the rod we do not mean corporal punishment alone; we simply say that one ought not to exclude it, (cf. Pro_23:14) and that there are some cases where nothing else will do. As for the rest, behold the principle which should direct Christian parents in such a case to employ discipline of the sweetest possible character, but discipline sufficient to repress the sin." Let this careful discipline be supplemented by a careful instruction and the children shall be faithfully "nurtured" for the Lord.
III THE EVOKED OBEDIENCE.
(Vers. 1-3.) Children are to obey their parents; they are to honor their father and mother. There is to be reverence in the obedience. This will be secured if the parents are qualified by being God-like. It should, however, be rendered even when the parents are far from perfect. The loyalty of the children must not be determined by the character of the parents; as the natural governors, the parents are entitled to obedience even though they do not morally deserve it. The obedience has no exception. Nor does any majority make the obligation to cease. Our obedience as God"s "dear children" should be the model of our filial obedience. Let us be loyal to our parents, just as we feel bound to be loyal to our Father in heaven!
IV THE ATTENDANT BLESSING.
(Ver. 3.) All God"s commandments carry blessings in their bosoms. In the keeping of them there is great reward. (Psa_19:11) But the fifth commandment has this temporal blessing associated with it of longevity. Obedient children, by a Divine law, live longer than disobedient ones. Dr. Crosby goes so far as to assert that this law of longevity has only "one apparent exception where the soul itself prefers to leave this world for a better, and where, therefore, the letter of the promise yields to its spirit, and God, instead of continuing the saint upon earth, takes him to his desired home in heaven. Where this exception does not occur, we must believe that every one who dies before old age has disregarded this command." Now, Christianity, in promoting nurture and evoking obedience, is so far securing the longevity of its children. We can see that the unity of Christian families must, ceteris paribus, foster health and longevity. In this way Bushnell"s assurance may come true of "the out-populating power of the Christian stock. R.M.E.
HOMILIES BY R. FINLAYSON Vers. 1-4.
The duties of children and parents.
I DUTY OF CHILDREN. "Children, obey your parents.
1. Sphere in which the obedience is to take place. "In the Lord." It was said in Eph_5:21, as determining the character of the whole subjection that there is between human beings, that it is to be "in the fear of Christ." That is to be interpreted as meaning that, in each ease, Christ is to be regarded as the authority (behind the visible) before which those who are subjected are to bow. The husband, we have seen, represents Christ (so far as it goes) to the wife. And so the parents represent Christ to the children. And then only can the children obey in the Lord when they regard their parents as placed over them in the Lord. In baptism parents acknowledge that their children belong to the Lord as standing over them. And, in accordance with this, children are to look to their parents as standing in the place of Christ to them, and to obey them as though they were obeying Christ.
2. Natural ground of the duty. "For this is right." There is a relationship founded deep in nature between parents and those to whom they have given being. This is associated with an affection which is one of the most beautiful things in our nature. The strength of the parental affection qualifies the parents for being placed in authority over their children. And the filial affection leads the children to look to their parents as the natural source of authority ever them.
3. Scriptural confirmation. "Honor thy father and mother." This is the fifth commandment, and is wider in its range than obedience to parents. Contents of fifth commandment.
(1) Children are to honor their parents by treating them with proper respect. Children are to respect their parents on the ground of their superior age. We are commanded to rise up before the hoary head, and honor the face of the old man. So children should show reverence to their parents because of their years. And those years are associated with superior attainments. A big ship leaving for another land needs to be cautiously piloted out of the dock and past the other ships in the harbor or river, away beyond the bar, and, it may be, through the channel, until it is out to the open sea. Men of special knowledge need to be employed for this, that the ship may not get on to the sandbanks or on to the rocks. So children in their inexperience, their ignorance of the shoals and rocks and seamanship, need to be piloted by the superior wisdom of their parents until they are out to the open sea of life. And it is right that they should think of themselves with humility, and treat with respect those who are appointed their guides. There are certain natural signs by which this may be shown a readiness to give place to them, to give them the best seat, to be silent when they speak, a tone of deference (while at the same time of confidence), and a certain courtesy in address which is not inconsistent with familiarity. When Solomon on his throne saw his mother approaching (inferior though she was to him in one relationship), he rose to meet her, and bowed himself unto her, and caused a seat to be set for her on his right hand. It would be well for children (who are sometimes inclined to be rude to their parents) to take an example from the wise king. "Cursed be he that setteth light by his father or his mother." "The eye that mocketh at his father, and despiseth to obey his mother, the ravens of the valley shall pick it out, and the young eagles shall eat it;" that is, something terrible shall overtake him who dares to make light of his parents.
(2) C hildren are to honor their parents by showing gratitude to them. How much are children laid under obligation to their parents! There was a time when they were entirely helpless, could neither walk nor speak, and, but for the care of parents, they would have perished. And parental cares for them do not soon cease. How they need to be watched, to be kept out of harm"s way! And when they are sick, how they need to be attended to day and night! The mother needs to labor on all day in the house (sometimes when she is not strong) to keep things right for them. And the father needs to go out and work that he may provide shelter, and clothing, and food, and schooling for them. The children are not in a position to know all the sacrifices their parents make for them, and the amount of thought that is bestowed on them, and the prayers that are put up for them. But they are receiving daily marks of their kindness, and they should receive these, not as though they were entitled to them, but with feelings of gratitude ever fresh. They will never have on earth better friends, greater benefactors, than Christ has given them in their parents. And let them value the gift.
(3) Children are to honor their parents by being obedient to them. This is the point on which stress is laid (as though it summed up the command) by the apostle. There is nothing by which children can better requite all the trouble that their parents have had on their account than by their obedience. This is the most beautiful flower that there can be in their character as children. It is true of them (as of those who have not come out of the childish state) that they are creatures of impulse, and inclined to, seize upon present gratification, without thinking whether it is for their good or not. Parents, as preferring their future happiness to present gratification, must lay commands on them, and the commands should be felt to be easy as coming from those who are at the same time heaping kindness on them. Children should be prompt to obey. They should not wait until they are threatened. They should not yield with a grudge. They should not think of opposing their untutored wills and crude wishes to the disciplined wills and ripe judgments of their parents. Let them honor their parents by giving them all obedience.
(4) Children are to honor their parents by being helpful to them. There are little services which, from an early age, children can render to their parents. They should be pleased even to leave their play to run an errand for them. They should not grudge doing things about the house to relieve an overworked mother. Sometimes sick parents have been thrown on their children, and then it has been seen what little hands can do. Some Parents have a very hard struggle, and children may relieve them of much care and save them not a little expense by taking care of what takes money to replace. There are some children who only think now much they can get out of their parents (do not think whether their parents can afford it, or have to want to give them). Children who wish to honor their parents will be unwilling that they should want for them, and will think how much they can save to their parents of labor and expense.
(5) Children are to honor their parents by placing confidence in them. Parents and children are friends, and there is nothing on Which friendship more hinges than confidence. Parents are intended to know all that their children do, and it is wrong for children to conceal anything from them. If they wish to undertake anything, let them ask their parents" consent. Let nothing be done on which they would not wish their parents" eyes to rest. If they have done wrong, let them frankly come forward and confess their faults, and ask forgiveness. But let there be no concealment, no artifice, no untruthfulness. Children who practice deceit on their parents are likely to form character according to one of the most detestable types. All will come to regard them with distrust.
(6) Children are to honor their parents by attending to their instructions. Children are to take full advantage of the provision made by their parents for their education; but their duty does not end there. They are to lend a ready ear to their parents when they talk to them, especially about serious subjects. They should love to hear the story of Christ and his love. They should not turn away their ear when their parents tell them what dispositions they are to cultivate, what temptations they are to shun, what company they are to keep, what books they are to read; when they tell them to be respectful, truthful, honest, kind, and above all dutiful to their Father in heaven. "My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother. For they shall be an ornament of grace unto thy head, and chains about thy neck." Promise annexed to the fifth commandment. "Which is the first commandment with promise, that it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth." It is no longer the land of Canaan that is mentioned, as it was when the promise was first given. The whole earth (not merely the heavenly Canaan) is to be regarded as the land of promise nosy for God"s people. The promise is not to be understood as absolutely guaranteeing long life to dutiful children. For there are some who die in childhood and who have not been less exemplary than those who get the blessing of a longer life. The good die first," it is said, and there is truth in the saying. Some who have been early taken away have exhibited a singular sweetness and a ripeness beyond their years. Still, it is true (apart from other considerations that may come in) that long life is promised to children who honor their father and mother. And we can see how God (in his ordinary providence) works towards this end. Those who are dutiful to their parents are likely to grow up good members of society. They are not likely to bring their life to an untimely end in disgraceful quarrels or by crime. They are not likely to shorten their days by intemperance or by idleness. They are likely, too, to grow up good members of the Church, and may have their lives prolonged to them because of their usefulness. When Peter"s life was in danger, prayer was made without ceasing of the Church unto God for him. And his life was spared because of its felt valuableness. So if we interest people in us, by services rendered to them, their good wishes and prayers may go to our days being lengthened out for us.
II DUTY OF PARENTS. Fathers are addressed; mothers might have been addressed as well. But one class only being mentioned it is those who represent the others.
1. Negatively. "And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath." Parents have not a right to act as they please toward their children. They are responsible to him who has placed them over their children, and are bound to act in his spirit. Parents provoke their children to wrath when they give them a sense of wrong.
(1) By over-commandment. Parents have a right to exact of their children; but there are limits to what is to be exacted of them. To heap command upon command, prohibition upon prohibition, is not to accomplish the end aimed at. When the requirement is more than can reasonably be rendered, it becomes vexatious. The children lose the sense of their ability to obey, and under compulsion are provoked to wrath.
(2) By unreasonable blame. It is true of children that they need a great amount of encouragement. And where it is deserved it ought to be freely bestowed. To bestow it where it is not deserved is to encourage unreality. Faults (at least the more serious, where they are numerous)are to be dealt with. But extreme care must be taken never to impute blame undeservedly or tentatively to children. There should be no hint of blame unless there is sure ground to go upon. For if children are stung with a sense of injustice, then, provoked to wrath, they are apt to think that they may as well do the things with which they are credited.
(3) By passionateness. Children can understand a burst of indignation for some serious offence, and are the better for it. But they are also quick to understand. When their parents lose command of themselves and punish beyond what the offence deserves. This is carefully to be avoided, for passionateness provokes passionateness; the passionate father makes a passionate son.
2. Positively. "But nurture them in the chastening and admonition of the Lord." Such nurture is to be understood as a tender plant needs. If it is to be brought to any perfection, then it needs to be suited as to soil, as to exposure, as to temperature, as to nourishment, as to protection from insects, as to its particular habits. So parents have tender plants given them in their children to rear up, sometimes exceptionally tender, but tender in any circumstances. They have to keep them from the storms and blasts that would wither them. They have their physical development carefully to watch over. Their intellectual development, too, needs great care, that they may not grow up stunted. And especially has care to be bestowed on the nurture of their spiritual powers.
(1) This nurture is to have a distinctively Christian character. The appliances mentioned are described as being "of the Lord." That is, they are such appliances as those acting for Christ should use. They are to be used toward Christian ends. They are to be used toward the children being trained up as Christians. Parents are to train up their children as those committed to their care by Christ. They are to train them up for Christ. They are to indoctrinate them with Christian truth. They are to seek to attach them, not merely to themselves, but through themselves to Christ. They are to seek that their whole being may be subject to and center round Christ.
(2) The Christian appliances.
(a) Chastening. It is difficult (apparently impossible) to get words in the English language to represent the two words that are in the Greek original. They are in a general way to be distinguished as discipline by power and discipline by reason. This distinction is effected in the words which are used in the Revised translation ("chastening and admonition"), but by an undue limitation of the meaning. The first word is more than discipline by punishment; the punishment is accidental, or what is only occasionally to be resorted to in discipline. It is rather all that drilling which a parent gives his children in virtue of the executive (magisterial) power which is placed in him. He has certain rules by which he goes in training his children, and he has got the power to enforce them. The first lesson he has to teach them is that he is their master. And so they are, at first, purely in his strong grasp. In vain is all their resistance. As soon as they can lisp words they must use them in prayer. They are passive in his hand, and he can make them utter what he pleases, he makes them observe simplicity, restraint, good manners in eating, that they may not learn to make too much of the pleasures of the table. He makes them say "grace before meat," that they may learn betimes from whom all table-comforts come. He makes them attend to their lessons, that they may know that they have got to work and not to be idlers. He makes them be select as to their companionships, that they may not get out into evil associations. He appoints certain hours for the house, that they may learn order and punctuality. He does not ask them if they will go to church, but he makes them go to church with him. That is the kind of drilling that is meant here, and when it is necessary it must be backed up by chastening, or judicious punishment for good.
(b) Admonition. This is also a word of too narrow a meaning. The Greek word means generally an appeal to reason. This commences at a later stage, viz. when intellect begins to open. It is not necessary that a parent should always explain to a child the reasons of his procedure. But it is important that, as a rule, children should have explained to them the evil of the course they are asked to avoid, and the advantages of the course they are asked to follow. And if they evince a tendency to any evil course, it is right that they should be remonstrated with or reproved. The importance of an appeal to reason is that it has in view the emancipation of the children from parental authority. The time has to come when they have to go from under their parents, and be thrown upon their own responsibilities and resources. And it is all-important that, when they go out to the world and meet its temptations, they should be fortified with good habits and reasons which they have in their minds for a course of sobriety, of industry, and of godliness. Parents, then, should feel their responsibility with regard to the proper up-bringing of their children. This responsibility is great in view of the evil that is so natural to them, and in view of the evil example with which they are surrounded. They should see to it that they are first of all Christians themselves, leading a Christian life before their children. They are especially to see that they are Christians in the methods which they use with their children. R.F.
HOMILIES BY D. THOMAS Vers. 1-4.
Children and their parents.
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honor thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; that it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord." In the preceding paragraph the apostle had treated of the relative duties of husbands and wives; here he directs attention to the relative duties of parents and children.
I THE DUTY OF CHILDREN. The words lead us to consider the nature and reason of the obligation which children owe to their parents.
1. The nature. The duty is:
(1) "Obedience." "Children, obey your parents." This duty has its limitation. When, for example, the command is impracticable, it is not binding. When the parent makes demands surpassing the child"s capacity, he is a tyrant, and the child is free from the obligation. Or when the command is morally wrong, when it clashes with the rights of conscience and the claims of God, obedience to it is no duty, but would be a sin. The duty is obedience rendered in a Christian spirit. "In the Lord." Any conduct towards parents, mankind in general, or to the great God, that is not inspired with love to Christ, has no virtue in it. All acts to be acceptable to God must be done in the name and spirit of his blessed Son.
(2) "Honor." Honor thy father and mother." That is, reverence them. This implies, of court, that they are honor-worthy. It is, alas! often the duty of children to abhor and despise the character of their parents, because of its falsehood, intemperance, profligacy, and crime. Paul supposes parents to be what their relation to their children and God demands pure, generous, and noble. Such parents are to be honored. Not to honor them is to dishonor God.
2. The reason. What is the reason for this obedience and reverence?
(1) Because it is right. "For this is right." Nature teaches the rectitude of it. There is implanted in every child"s mind the feeling that he is bound to obey and reverence his parents. This feeling of obligation in some form or other is universal. The Bible teaches the rectitude of it. It was engraven by the finger of God on the tables of stone; it was inculcated in the teaching and exemplified in the life of Jesus Christ.
(2) Because it is expedient. "That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth." A happy and a long life depends upon it. Children who are regardless of their filial duties will be regardless of all others, and rendered liable to fall into those habits of depravity which will render their life a misery, and cut short their days on the earth.
II THE DUTY OF PARENTS. The duty of parents is here set forth in two forms, negatively and positively.
1. Negatively. "Ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath." The temper of a child is of transcendent moment; it is that which determines his character and destiny. To act upon that temper in its opening years so as to fret and sour it is to do an incalculable mischief. Against this evil it is the duty of parents strenuously to guard. Petty interferences, trivial prohibitions, incessant chidings, and an irritable spirit, are the things in parental conduct which "provoke children to wrath.
2. Positively. "But bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord." Train their faculties, bring out their latent powers, teach them to think with accuracy, to love with purity, to act with adroitness and promptitude. Do this by admonishing them "in the Lord." Let the lessons of instruction and warning be drawn from the existence, the life, the character, and the teachings of the Lord. The child"s faculties cannot be developed apart from God. Secular education is a contradiction in terms; it is as great a solecism as a sunless vegetation. Let parents look well to the minds of their children. The farmer who neglects the culture of his fields will soon have his acres overrun with thorns and briars and noxious weeds; and the parent who neglects the culture of his child will soon discover evils far more hideous and disastrous. The following from the quaint pen of smart old Fuller will be read with interest and profit on the subject: good parent. He showeth them, in his own practice, what to follow and imitate; and, in others, what to shun and avoid. For though " the words of the wise be as nails fastened by the masters of the assemblies", (Ecc_12:11) yet, sure their examples are the hammer to drive them in, to take the deeper hold. A father that whipped his son for swearing, and swore himself whilst he whipped him, did more harm by his example than good by his correction. He doth not welcome and embrace the first essays of sin in his children. Weeds are counted herbs in the beginning of spring: nettles are put in pottage, and salads are made of elder buds. Thus fond fathers like the oaths and wanton talk of their little children, and please themselves to hear them displease God. But our wise parent both instructs his children in piety and with correction blasts the first buds of profaneness in them. He that will not use the rod on his child, his child shall be used as a rod on him. He allows his children maintenance according to their quality. Otherwise it will make them base, acquaint them with bad company and shocking tricks; and it makes them surfeit the sooner when they come to their estates. It is observed of camels, that having traveled long without water through sandy deserts, implentur, cum bibendi est occasio, et in praeteritum et infuturum ("when they find an opportunity they fill themselves both for the past and the future"); and so these thirsty heirs soak it when they come to their means, who, whilst their fathers were living might not touch the top of their money, and think they shall never feel the bottom of it when they are dead. In choosing a profession, he is directed by his child"s disposition, whose inclination is the strongest indenture to bind him to a trade. But when they set Abel to till the ground, and send Cain to keep sheep; Jacob to hunt, and Esau to live in tents; drive some to school, and others from it; they commit a violence on nature, and it will thrive accordingly. Yet he burnouts not his child when he makes an unworthy choice beneath himself, or rather for ease than use, pleasure than profit. If his son proves wild, he doth not cast him off so far but he marks the place where he lights. With the mother of Moses, he doth not suffer his son so to sink or swim but he leaves one to stand afar off to watch what will become of him. (Exo_2:4) He is careful, while quenched his luxury, not withal to put out his life; the rather, because their souls who have broken and run out in their youth have proved the more healthful for it afterwards. He moves him to marriage rather by argument drawn from his good than his own authority. It is a style too princely for a parent herein to "will and command;" but, sure, he may will and desire. Affections, like the conscience, are rather to be led than drawn; and it is to be feared, they that marry where they do not love, will love where they do not marry. He doth not give away his loaf to his children and then come to them for a piece of bread. He holds the reins (though loosely) in his own hands; and keeps, to reward duty and punish undutifulness. Yet, on good occasion, for his children"s advancement, he will depart from part of his means. Base is their nature who will not have their branches lopped till their body be felled; and will let go none of their goods, as if it presaged their speedy death; whereas it doth not follow that he that puts off his cloak must presently go to bed. On his death-bed he bequeaths his blessing to all his children. Nor rejoiceth he so much to leave them great portions as honestly obtained. Only money well and lawfully gotten is good and lawful money. And if he leaves his children young, he principally nominates God to be their guardian; and, next to him, is careful to appoint provident overseers. The good child. He reverenceth the person of his parent, the old, poor, and froward. As his parent bore with him when a child, he bears with his parent if twice a child; nor doth his dignity above him cancel his duty unto him. When Sir Thomas More was Lord Chancellor of England, and Sir John his father one of the judges of the King"s Bench, he would in Westminster fall beg his blessing of him on his knees. He observes his lawful commands, and practiseth his precepts with all obedience. I cannot, therefore, excuse St. Barbara from undutifulness, and occasioning her own death. The matter this: her father, being a pagan, commanded his workmen, building his house, to make two windows in a room. Barbara, knowing her father"s pleasure; in his absence enjoined them to make three, that, seeing them, she might the better contemplate the mystery of the Holy Trinity. Methinks two windows might as well have raised her meditations, and the light arising from both would as properly have minded her of the Holy Spirit proceeding from the Father and the Son. Her father, enraged at his return, thus came to the knowledge of her religion, and accused her to the magistrate, which cost her her life. Having practiced, then, himself, he entails his parents" precepts on his posterity. Therefore such instructions are by Solomon (Pro_1:9) compared to frontlets and chains (not to a suit of clothes, which serves but one, and quickly wears out, or out of fashion), which have in them a real lasting worth, and are bequeathed as legacies to another age. The same counsels observed, are chains to grace, which, neglected, prove halters to strangle undutiful children. He is a stork to his parent, and feeds him in his old age. Not only if his father hath been a pelican, but though he hath been an ostrich unto him, and neglected him in his youth. He confines him not a long way off to a short pension, forfeited if he comes in his presence, but shows piety at home, and learns as St. Paul (1Ti_5:4) to requite his parent. And yet the debt (I mean only the principal, not counting the interest) cannot fully be paid. And therefore he compounds with his father, to accept in good worth his utmost endeavor. Such a child God commonly rewards with long life in this world. If he chance to die young, yet he lives long that lives well; and time misspent is not lived, but lost. Besides, God is better than his promise, if he takes him a long lease, and gives him a freehold of better value. As for disobedient children: if preserved from the gallows, they are reserved for the rack, to be tortured by their own posterity. One complained that never father had so undutiful a son as he had. "Yes," said his son, with less grace than truth, "my grandfather had." I conclude this subject with the example of a pagan"s, which will shame most Christians. Pomponius Atticus, making the funeral oration at the death of his mother, did protest that, living with her three score and seven years, he was never reconciled to her, se nuncquam matre in gratiam rediisse, because there never happened betwixt them the least jar which needed reconciliation. D.T.
The Pulpit Commentary (1880–1919), ed. H.D.M. Spence-Jones & Joseph S. Exell — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
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Eph_6:1-4
Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.
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Parents and children
I. Duties of children to parents.
1. Children owe to their parents an inward affection and regard. Their obedience should flow from love, gratitude, and esteem.
2. Children are to honour their parents by external tokens of respect.
3. Children are to obey the just commands of their parents.
4. Children are not only to obey the express commands of parents while under their authority, but to receive with decent and humble regard, the instructions, counsels, and reproofs which they may see fit to communicate afterward.
5. Children are to remember, and, if there is occasion, also to remunerate, the favours they have received from their parents.
II. Duties of parents to children.
1. Parents are to instruct their children in the doctrines and duties of religion.
2. Parents must not content themselves with giving their children good instructions; but endeavour, by arguments, exhortations, and reproofs, to form their lives according to their instructions.
3. Parents must regulate the diversions of their children.
4. Parents should maintain the worship of God in their houses.
5. Let parents set their children a good example in everything. (J. Lathrop, D. D.)
Christian children
I. The precept.
1. Observe the persons to whom the commandment is addressed children.
2. Observe what is commanded as the especial duty of children in reference to parents--obey, and honour.
3. The limitation of the precept--in the Lord. The parents stronghold is here, when he says, I must have you obedient, because I am responsible to God for your being so. And the childs strong encouragement is in the same thought: In obeying my parents, I am doing that which is pleasing to God, and I do it because the Lord so bids me.
II. The sanction.
1. To obey parents is right.
(1) Their age, experience, knowledge, entitle them to the obedience of their children.
(2) Love should prompt children to render obedience to their parents.
2. There is a promise annexed to obedience. God undertakes that His blessing shall be given. (James Cohen, M. A.)
Our fathers and mothers
Now this short text is a message to us about our duty to them.
I. Notice whom you are to obey and honour. Your parents--your father and mother.
II. What it is to honour and obey them.
1. We must respect and reverence them. We should regard them as those to whose love and government God Himself has committed us. I have read of two sons who saved their aged parents at the sacrifice of all they possessed and at the risk of their own lives. The city was on fire, and they were in the middle of it; they had gold in the cellar and plate in the cupboard; but one took his father on his back, and the other his mother, and away they ran through the scorching streets and falling houses, till they got outside the walls! Those lads loved their parents with perfect love. How different to the wretched heathen who leave their old fathers and mothers to perish! Mr. Moffat, an African missionary, found a poor woman under a tree; she was a mere skeleton, and the bloodthirsty wolves were bowling around her! She said her children had got tired of her because she was sick; they had been gone some days, and she must sit there till she died.
2. To honour and obey our parents means that we are to do whatever will make them happy, even though they do not enjoin it upon us.
3. To honour and obey them means that we are to do whatever they tell us. Their commands are to be laws with us. A soldier is ordered to do this and that by his officer--it may be to carry a letter through the enemys country, it may be to take the place of a comrade who has just been shot down at a gun, but he knows that he may not hesitate for a moment; if he refused, his character as a soldier would be gone, and he would be drummed out of the army. But what claim has an officer on a soldier, compared with the claim of a parent on a child?
III. How far we are to honour and obey our parents (see Col_3:20). We are to obey our parents in everything so far as their commands agree with those of God, and no further; if they required us to steal, or lie, or cheat, or do anything wrong, we should not be called to obey them. But, dear children, it is not probable that your beloved parents will ever require you to do anything of this kind; and in all other cases you are bound to obey them. I press that all, because many boys and girls will pick and choose amongst duties as they would amongst apples; they will do what is easy and pleasant to them. Now, it seems to me that difficult things are just the test of obedience. Some things are no test at all. Suppose a father were to say to his son, Run and buy yourself a dozen raspberry tarts; not one boy in a hundred but would run to the shop as fast as his legs could carry him; but for all that, he might be a disobedient boy at heart. Now, let us try him again; Leave off your play, and take this note to the doctors for me. Look at him now! He pretends not to hear, or he puts it on his younger brother, or he flies into a passion, or he says right out, Father, I cant. But if, instead of this, he at once cried, Father, Ill be ready in a minute, and pulled on his jacket, and went skipping down the street with a smiling face, I should mark him in my pocket book for a thoroughly obedient lad.
IV. Why you are to honour and obey them.
1. Because God has told us to do it. And God is so wise and good that whatever he bids us do should be done unhesitatingly; His command and our obedience to it should follow one another as quickly as the clap of thunder follows the flash of lightning.
2. Because we owe, under God, our existence to them.
3. Because they are our superiors. If, directly we were born, we were as strong and as wise as they are; then it would be different--we would manage for ourselves: but just look how it is. We come into the world the most helpless of creatures--far more helpless than a lamb, for it can stand by itself--far more helpless than a chicken, for it can pick up its own food. There we are, unable to do one single thing for ourselves; we know nothing at all; we have not a particle of experience! When a boy gets into a boat for the first time, all is strange to him. What should we think of him if he declared that he was going to start for New Zealand, just as he was? We should cry out, You are mad! But if he embarked in a large ship under a tried and skilful captain, then there would be no danger. Now, our parents are tried and skilful captains; they have sailed on the rough ocean of life in many directions; they understand all about its winds, and tides, and currents; they have sounded here, and anchored there; they have marked rocks in one place and shoals in other, and whirlpools in another. They have travelled the dangerous road of life for years; they have learnt the right turnings and the best inns; they know the spots where robbers lurk and wild beasts prowl; they know which fruits may be eaten, and which are poisonous; they know who are safe companions, and who will lead astray: In other words, having read so much, and heard so much, and seen so much, and suffered so much, they are able to guide us; they can tell us how to avoid what is harmful, and how to secure what is valuable; they can train us up in the way in which we should go.
4. Because they are our nearest and dearest friends.
5. Because it will be good for us. It is the first commandment with promise; and the promise is, Thy days shall be long in the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee. No doubt this referred more particularly to Jewish children, because, as we have seen, those of them who were disobedient were stoned to death, and thus their days were short in the land; whilst those of them who were obedient lived on. But many Christians think that this promise is still fulfilled to dutiful sons and daughters. And, as a fact, they do live longer. For disobedient children soon fall into wicked ways and among wicked associates, and rain their health, and come to an untimely end. The ungodly shall not live out half their days. So it was with the sons of Eli; so it was with Absalom; so it has been with many youths whom I have known. On the other hand, how different it is with the obedient child; he has his parents praise, which is an ever-flowing fountain of joy! He has their most fervent prayers! The smell of their son is to them as the smell of a field which the Lord hath blessed. Often as they embrace him, their bowels yearn over him, as they say, God be gracious unto thee, my son! or, God give thee of the dew of heaven, and the fatness of the earth, and plenty of corn and wine. A blameless childhood blossoms into a graceful manhood! (J. Bolton, B. A.)
Filial obedience
Children ought to render to their parents--
1. The obedience of love.
2. The obedience of reverence. It is honour thy father and thy mother. There may be much love, much fondness, and much real obedience, yet I have sometimes seen a most lamentable deficiency in this veneration for parents. If I look into the Word of God, there I see the principle exhibited. I see Joseph, in the forty-sixth of Genesis, meeting with his old father--Joseph who was next on the throne to Pharaoh, a great man in Egypt, with thousands at his beck: yet I find, in the twenty-ninth verse, Joseph made ready his chariot, and went up to meet Israel his father, to Goschen, and presented himself unto him; and he fell on his neck and wept on his neck a good while. And if I turn to another passage, it is still more striking: in the case of Bathsheba and Solomon. It is in the second chapter of the First Book of Kings, and the nineteenth verse. Bathsheba therefore went unto King Solomon, to speak unto him for Adonijah. And the king rose up to meet her, and bowed himself unto her, and sat down on his throne, and caused a seat to be set for the kings mother; and she sat on his right hand.
3. The obedience of gratitude.
4. The obedience of submission. (J. H. Evans, M. A.)
Fatal result of disobedience
Many years ago, a minister lived in a cottage near some very high, rocky hills, which rose abruptly from the vale below. He had two sons, who were not as obedient as boys ought to be. They fancied themselves wiser than their father, and often treated his commands with contempt. Now this good minister knew that the cliffs were not very safe for the boys to venture on. They were too perpendicular, and had too few places for the feet, to be climbed or descended by anyone without great risk of life or limbs. He pointed out this danger to his sons, and repeatedly said to them, Be sure you never venture down the face of the cliffs. You can see that this was good advice, and the boys ought to have given due heed to it. But I am sorry to be forced to tell you these boys were wilful, and disobeyed. They said yes to their father when he gave them this command, and then went out and broke it. Many birds built their nests in the holes among the rocks, and these bad boys would venture down in search of their eggs. They did this so frequently without meeting with any mishap, that they grew bold in their disobedience, and often laughed at their father for being so particular and old-fogyish. One day, however, these boys did not go home to dinner. Their parents wondered where they were, but made no search until tea time. Then the non-appearance of the boys troubled them. They sent, round the village to inquire for them, but they had not been seen since noon, when they were dismissed from school. The minister and his wife were now very much alarmed. They sent messengers in every direction. Their good fathers heart trembled with fear lest they had tumbled over the cliffs. He went down a gorge which led to the vale below, and there, to his dismay, he found them cold, mangled, and dead! Their disobedience had proved their destruction,
The root of heaven, or hell, struck in the nursery
All vice and crime may be traced to the nursery. The foundations of reverence are either earnestly laid, or perilously sapped, in the very first years. In the first act of disobedience the child commits himself to a downward course. The assertion of self-will in a disobedient act, is evidence enough that the powers of darkness have prevailed to lay the foundation of hell in the young soul. The parents who tolerate, or mildly pass over the disobedience of their children, tolerate what constitutes the beginning of all evil, and the root of eternal evil. The children who are permitted to make light of the authority of their father and mother, will in all probability grow up to make light of the authority of God. In dishonouring their parents, they have already dishonoured God. They have disgraced themselves, impaired their own moral sense, given their consent to evil spirits as their allies, and entered on the way which leads them to destruction. Children should be made to obey long before they can understand why they should obey. Their hearts should beat, their muscles grow, and their nerves vibrate and play, under the necessity of obedience. From the beginning, their freedom should be freedom in obedience. As soon as they can understand it, they should be taught that reverence for their parents, manifested by unhesitating obedience, is Gods command. And children who obey their parents because God commands it, are in the straight way wherein they shall not stumble. It shall be well with them, both for time and eternity. They are in the Way that they should go--the Way that leadeth unto life eternal, and when they are old they will not depart from it. They have begun to do right. The foundation of God is in them, and it shall stand forever, and they shall be built up forever. Children, obey your parents, in the Lord, for this is right. It is right, not because it is commanded; but it is commanded because it is right, and it is right because it is essentially good, safe, and prosperous. In the law and ordinance of each childs creation, God has made a provision for the reverence of fathers and mothers. Parents are taken into the secrecy of His creative council, that no child may receive his existence immediately from Himself, but from Him, through them. Irreverent and disobedient children, therefore, do violence to the very spring and ground of their own nature; they rupture the covenant which God has made with obedient children; they cut themselves off from all part in His promises; they dissolve their connection with all blessed spirits and angels, and give pledges to Satan. (J. Pulsford.)
A daughters obedience
A missionary was passing along the streets of London, and he saw a little girl lying asleep on the steps in the night, the rain beating in her face, and he awakened her and said, My little girl, what do you here? Oh! she replied, my father drove me out, and I am waiting until he is asleep, and then I am going in. Then she told the story of her fathers drunkenness. That night after her father was asleep, she went back and laid down in the house. In the morning she was up early, preparing the meal, and her father turned over, waking up from his scene of drunkenness and debauch, and he saw his little child preparing breakfast, and he said to her, Mary, why do you stay with me? Oh! she said, father, it is because I love you. Well, he said, why do you love me when everybody despises me? and why do you stay with me? Well, she said, father, you remember when mother was dying, she said to me: Mary, never forsake your father; the rum fiend will some day go out, and he will be very good and kind to you, and my dying charge is, dont forsake your father; and I never will, father, I never will. Mother said I must not, and I never will.
An excellent proof
While driving along the street one day last winter in my sleigh, a little boy, six or seven years old, asked me the usual question, Please, may I ride? I answered him, Yes, if you are a good boy. He climbed into the sleigh; and when I again asked, Are you a good boy? he looked up pleasantly and said, Yes, sir. Can you prove it? Yes, sir. By whom? Why, by my mother, said he, promptly. I thought to myself, here is a lesson for boys and girls. When a child feels and knows that mother not only loves, but has confidence in him or her, and can prove obedience, truthfulness, and honesty, by mother, they are pretty safe. That boy will be a joy to his mother while she lives.
Obedience and character
A tradesman once advertised in the morning papers for a boy to work in his store, run errands, and make himself generally useful. The next morning the store was thronged with boys of all ages and sizes trying to get the place. The storekeeper only wanted one boy, and as he was at a loss to know how to get the right one out of so large a crowd, he thought he must find out some plan to lessen the number of boys and to be sure of getting a good one. So he sent them all away till he could think over the matter a little. The next day the papers contained this advertisement: Wanted--a boy who obeys his mother. And out of the crowd who were there the day before, how many do you suppose came to get that place? Only two. Whichever of these two the storekeeper chose we may be very certain would prove a good boy. Jesus was pleasing His Father in heaven all the time that He was obeying His mother on earth. And so it is always. The boys who learn to obey at home are the boys who will be most wanted for places in business, and who will be most useful and successful in them. (Dr. Newton.)
How to bring up children
The late Dr. Henry Ware, when once asked by a parent to draw up some set of rules for government of children, replied by an anecdote: Dr. Hitchcock, he said, was settled in Sandwich; and, when he made his first exchange with the Plymouth minister, he must needs pass through the Plymouth Woods, a nine miles wilderness, where travellers almost always got lost, and frequently came out at the point they started from. Dr. Hitchcock, on entering this much dreaded labyrinth, met an old woman, and asked her to give him some directions for getting through the wood so as to fetch up at Plymouth, rather than Sandwich. Certainly, she said, I will tell you all about it with the greatest pleasure. You will just keep right on till you get some ways into the woods, and you will come to a place where several roads branch off. Then you must Stop and consider, and take the one that seems to you most likely to bring you out right. He did so, and came out right. Dr. Ware added, I have always followed the worthy and sensible old ladys advice in bringing up my children. I do not think anybody can do better: at any rate, I cannot. Good common sense, doubtless, is often better than all set rules; but the thing is to have it.
Early impressions abide
Some years ago, a native Greenlander came to the United States. It was too hot for him there; so he made up his mind to return home, and took passage on a ship that was going that way; but he died before he got back, and, as he was dying, he turned to those who were around him, and said, Go on deck and see if you can see ice. What a strange thing! some would say. It was not a strange thing at all. When that man was a baby the first thing he saw, after his mother, was ice. His house was made of ice. The window was a slab of ice. He was cradled in ice. The water that he drank was melted ice. If he ever sat at a table, it was a table of ice. The scenery about his home was ice. The mountains were of ice. The fields were filled with ice. And when he became a man he had a sledge and twelve dogs that ran him fifty miles a day over ice. And many a day he stooped over a hole in the ice twenty-four hours to put his spear in the head of any seal that might come there. He had always been accustomed to see ice, and he knew that if his companions on the ship could see ice it would be evidence that he was near home. The thought of ice was the very last thought in his mind, as it was the very first impression made there. The earliest impressions are the deepest. Those things which are instilled into the hearts of children endure forever and forever.
The childrens life in Christ
I sometimes meet with men and women who tell me that they cannot remember the time when they began to love and trust and obey Christ, just as they cannot remember the time when they began to love and trust and obey their parents. If we had a more vivid and a more devout faith in the truth that every Christian family is according to Gods idea and purpose a part of the kingdom of heaven, this happy experience would be more common. The law of Christ is the rule of human conduct in childhood as well as in manhood; and as in Christs kingdom grace precedes law, the grace of Christ is near to a child in its very earliest years to enable it to keep the law, and the childs earliest moral life may be a life in Christ. Christs relationship to men cannot be a relationship of authority merely. His authority is the authority of One who has assumed our nature and died for our sins. He is our Prince that He may be our Saviour. These truths are assumed in the precept that children are to obey their parents in the Lord. Every child, apart from its choice and before it is capable of choice, is environed by the laws of Christ. It is equally true that every child, apart from its choice and before it is capable of choice, is environed by. Christs protection and grace in this life, and is the heir of eternal blessings in the life to come. Christ died and rose again for the race. Children may obey their parents in the Lord, before they are able to understand any Christian doctrine; they may discharge every childish duty, under the inspiration of the Spirit of God, before they have so much as heard whether the Spirit of God has been given; they may live in the light of God before they know that the true light always comes from heaven. And as men and women, who are consciously relying on God to enable them to do His will, appropriate Gods grace and make it more fully their own by keeping His commandments, so the almost unconscious virtues of devout children make the life of Christ more completely theirs. Like Christ Himself, who in His childhood was subject to Joseph and Mary, as they advance in stature they advance in wisdom and in favour with God and men. This is the ideal Christian life. (R. W. Dale, LL. D.)
Conflicting duties
The difficulties of obedience are usually greatest in the troubled years between childhood and manhood; and not unfrequently these difficulties are increased rather than diminished when during these years the religious life begins to be active. To a boy or girl of fifteen the discovery of God sometimes seems to dissolve all human relationships. The earthly order vanishes in the glory of the infinite and the Divine. There is also a sudden realization of the sacredness and dignity of the personal life, and whatever authority comes between the individual soul and God is felt to be a usurpation. At this stage in the development of the higher life the first commandment is also the only commandment that has any real authority. Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, seems to exhaust all human duty, and life has no place for any inferior obligations. I have a very deep sympathy with those young people who are trying, and trying very unsuccessfully, to adjust what seem to them the conflicting claims of the seen and the unseen, of earth and heaven. They have to remember that we live in two worlds, that both belong to God; and that we do not escape from the inferior order when the glory of eternal and Divine things is revealed to us. We still have to plough, and to sow, and to reap; to build houses; to work in iron, and brass, and silver and gold. The old world with its day and night, its sunshine and its clouds, its rain and snow, its heat and cold, is still our home. In things seen and temporal we have to do the will of the invisible and eternal God, and to be disciplined for our final perfection and glory. As God determined the laws of the physical universe, so He determined the limitations of human life, and the conditions upon which human duty is to be discharged. The family, the State, and the Church are Divine institutions: and the obligations which they create are rooted in the will of God. The family and the State belong to the natural order, but they are not less Divine in their origin than the Church, nor are their claims upon us less sacred. In the family the parents by Divine appointment exercise authority, and children are under Divine obligations to obedience. The ends for which the family exists are defeated if authority is not exercised on the one side, if obedience is not conceded on the other; just as the ends for which the State exists are defeated if rulers do not assert and enforce the law, if subjects habitually violate it. Children are to obey their parents, for this is right; right, according to the natural constitution and order of human affairs; right, according to the laws of natural morality; right, according to the natural conscience and apart from supernatural revelation. But in the discharge of this natural duty the supernatural life is to be revealed. Children are to obey their parents in the Lord, in the Spirit and in the strength of Christ. Obedience to parents is part of the service which Christ claims from us; it is a large province of the Christian life. (R. W. Dale, LL. D.)
The extent of parental authority
It is not enough that children obey their parents in those things which would have obligation apart from parental authority. To be truthful, honest, kindly, temperate, courageous, industrious, are duties whether a parent enforces them or not. They may be sanctioned and sustained by parental authority, but to discharge duties of this kind may be no proof of filial obedience; a child may discharge them without any regard to the authority of his parents. It is when the parent requires obedience in things which are neither right nor wrong in themselves, or which appear to the child neither right nor wrong in themselves, that the authority of the parents is unambiguously recognized. A parent may require obedience in things of this kind for the good of the child himself, for the sake of his health, for the sake of his intellectual vigour and growth, for the sake of his moral safety, or for the sake of his future success in life. Before the parents authority is exerted the child is free; but afterwards, whether the child sees the wisdom of the requirement or not, he is bound to obey. Or parental authority may be exerted for the sake of the family generally. Regulations intended to secure the order of the household, to prevent confusion, to lessen trouble, and to lessen expense, are often felt by young people to be extremely irksome. The regulations appear to be unreasonable, and to have no other object than to place vexatious restraints on personal liberty. Sometimes, no doubt, they are really unwise and unnecessary. But children are not the most competent judges; and in any case it is the parents, not the children, that are responsible for making the rules. The parents may be unwise in imposing them; but the children are more than unwise if they are restive under them and wilfully break them. To submit to restraints which are seen to be expedient and reasonable is a poor test of obedience; the real proof of filial virtue is given when there is loyal submission to restraints which appear unnecessary. There is less difficulty when a child is required to render personal service to a parent. The obligation is so obvious, that unless the child is intensely selfish the claim will be met with cheerfulness as well as with submission. Affection, gratitude, and a certain pride in being able to contribute to a parents ease or comfort, will make obedience a delight. To be of use satisfies one of the strongest cravings of a generous and noble nature, and that satisfaction is all the more complete if the act of service involves real labour and a real sacrifice of personal enjoyment. (R. W. Dale, LL. D.)
Family discipline and State security
The duty of obedience to parents, which is a natural duty, a duty arising out of the natural constitution of human life, was enforced in Jewish times by a Divine commandment. And this commandment had a place of special dignity in Jewish legislation; it was the first commandment with promise. Paul was not thinking of the Ten Commandments as if they stood apart from the rest of the laws which God gave to the Jewish people, or else he would have said that this was the only commandment that was strengthened by the assurance of a special reward to obedience. He meant that of all the Jewish laws this was the first that had a promise attached to it. The promise was a national promise. It was not an assurance that every child that obeyed his parents would escape sickness and poverty, would be prosperous, and would live to a good old age; it was a declaration that the prosperity, the stability, and the permanence of the nation depended upon the reverence of children for their parents. The discipline of the family was intimately related to the order, the security, and the greatness of the State. Bad children would make bad citizens. If there was a want of reverence for parental authority, there would be a want of reverence for public authority. If there was disorder in the home, there would be disorder in the nation; and national disorder would lead to the destruction of national life. But if children honoured their parents the elect nation would be prosperous, and would retain possession of the country which it had received from the hands of God. The greatness of the promise attached to this commandment, the fact that it was the first commandment that had any promise attached to it, revealed the Divine estimate of the obligations of filial duty. And although Jewish institutions have passed away, the revelation of Gods judgment concerning the importance of this duty remains. And the promise with which it was sanctioned is the revelation of a universal law. The family is the germ cell of the nation. If children honour their parents, men and women will be trained to those habits of order and obedience which are the true security of the public peace, and are among the most necessary elements of commercial and military supremacy; they will be disciplined to self-control, and will have strength to resist many of the vices which are the cause of national corruption and ruin. (R. W. Dale, LL. D.)
Honour is more than obedience
The commandment which Paul quotes requires children to honour their parents; honour includes obedience and something more. We may obey because we are afraid of the penalties of disobedience; and in that case the obedience though exact will be reluctant, without cheerfulness and without grace. We may obey under terror, or we may obey from motives of self-interest. We may think that the man to whom we are compelled to submit is in no sense our superior, that he is at best our equal, and that it is mere accident that gives him authority over us. But children are required to remember that their parents are their superiors, not their equals; that they have to honour parental dignity as well as to obey parental commands, that honour is to blend with obedience and to make it free and beautiful. The child that honours his parents will yield a real deference to their judgment and wishes when there is no definite and authoritative command; will respect even their prejudices; will chivalrously conceal their infirmities and faults; will keenly resent any disparagement of their claims to consideration; will resent still more keenly any assault on their character. In a family where this precept is obeyed, parents will be treated with uniform courtesy. There is a tradition that whenever Jonathan Edwards came into a room where his children were sitting, they rose as they would have risen at the entrance of a visitor. Forms of respect of this kind are alien from modern manners; but the spirit of which they were the expression still survives in well-bred families, I mean in families which inherit and preserve good traditions, whatever social rank they may belong to. Nor is it to parents alone that children should show this spirit of consideration and respect; brothers and sisters should show it to each other; and both among the rich and the poor it may be taken as a sure sign of vulgarity, inherited or acquired, if courtesy is reserved for strangers, and has no place in the life of the family. Children are to honour their parents, and if they honour their parents they are likely to be courteous to each other. (R. W. Dale, LL. D.)
Duty of parents to children
Paul had a sensitive sympathy with the wrongs which children sometimes suffer, and a strong sense of their claims to consideration. Children are to obey and to honour even unreasonable, capricious, and unjust parents; but it is the duty of parents not to be unreasonable, capricious, or unjust. Parents are sometimes wanting in courtesy to children as well as children to parents, speak to them roughly, violently, insultingly--and so inflict painful wounds on their self-respect. Parents sometimes recur with cruel iteration to the faults and follies of their children, faults and follies of which the children are already ashamed, and which it would be not only kind but just to forget. Parents are sometimes guilty of a brutal want of consideration; they allude in jest to personal defects to which the children are keenly sensitive, remind them mockingly of failures by which they have been deeply humiliated, speak cynically of pursuits in which their children have a passionate or romantic interest, and contemptuously and scornfully of companions and friends that their children enthusiastically admire and love. Parents are sometimes tyrannical, wilfully thwarting their childrens plans, needlessly interfering with their pleasures, and imposing on them unreasonable and fruitless sacrifices. Parents who desire to be loved and honoured and cheerfully obeyed should lay to heart the apostles warning: Provoke not your children to wrath. Then follows the positive precept, But nurture them in the chastening and admonition of the Lord. This covers the whole province of Christian education.
1. The precept implies a real and serious faith on the part of the parents that their children belong to Christ, and are under Christs care. The children are Christs subjects, and have to be trained to loyal obedience to His authority. Their earliest impressions of God should assure them that God loves them with an infinite and eternal love, and that He has blessed them with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ.
2. The education of which the apostle is thinking is practical rather than speculative; it has to do with life and character, rather than with knowledge. The order of a childs life is determined by its parents, and is to be determined under Christs authority, so that the child may be trained to all Christian virtues. In the earlier years of childhood this training will be, in a sense, mechanical. The child will not know why certain acts and habits are required of it, or why other acts and habits are forbidden. There will be no appeal to the childs conscience or reason; the parents conscience and the parents reason will assume the responsibility of guiding the childs conduct.
3. If it is the duty of a child to obey, it is the duty of parents to rule. There can be no obedience where there is no authority; and if a child is not disciplined to obedience it suffers a moral loss which can hardly ever be completely remedied in later years. The religious as well as the moral life is injured by the relaxation of parental rule. Obedience to the personal authority of parents disciplines us to obey the personal authority of God.
4. Children should be trained to the surrender of their own pleasure and comfort to the pleasure and comfort of others. Parents who have sacrificed themselves without reserve to their childrens gratification are sometimes bitterly disappointed that their children grow up selfish. They wonder and feel aggrieved that their devotion receives no response, that their children are not so eager to serve them as they have been to serve their children. On the other hand, parents who with equal affection have made themselves, not their children, the centre of the family life, seem to have been more fortunate. Not selfishly, harshly, or tyrannically, but firmly and consistently, they have required their children to take a secondary position. The comfort of the children and their pleasures were amply provided for, but the children were not led to think that everything in the house must give way to them, that all the sacrifices were to be made by their parents, none by themselves. They were trained to serve, and not merely to receive service. This seems to be the truer discipline of the Christian spirit and character.
5. In relation to the higher elements of the Christian life, to those elements which are distinctively Christian and spiritual, more depends upon the real character of the parents than upon anything besides. In relation to these the power of personal influence is supreme. If the parents really obey the will of Christ as their supreme law, if they accept His judgments about human affairs and about the ends of human life, if they live under the control of the invisible and eternal world, the children will know it, and are likely to yield to the influence of it. But if the parents, though animated by religious faith, are not completely Christian, if some of their most conspicuous habits of thought and conduct are not penetrated by the force of Christs spirit and teaching, the children are in great danger; they are as likely to yield to what is base and worldly in the life of their parents as to what is Divine. (R. W. Dale, LL. D.)
Parents and children
Family life has its origin with God. A more sacred position than that of father or mother it is impossible to occupy. And this because the highest revelation of God presents Him to us as a Parent. He is the Father of men. In every family, therefore, where love abounds and holy authority rules, there is a reflection of God. Then, further, according to a law of our Maker, children are a gift.
I. Try to estimate the worth of children. They are budding men and women.
II. Try to understand their individual characters. Careful study is needed for this. A family is a little world: each member of it has a personality of his or her own.
III. Try to appreciate the power of your influence. This can hardly be exaggerated, especially in the formative years of childhood. They are always learning from us, and being influenced by us. We can do nothing and say nothing but what leaves some kind of impression upon their young characters. We are their books, and they study US with keenest eyes, and reproduce us with a ludicrous accuracy.
IV. Try to recognize the limits of your authority.
1. It is bounded by the will of God.
2. It is limited by time. (Wm. Braden.)
Religious education
I. The nature of this duty.
1. Parents are required to impart to their children the instruction or wisdom of the Lord Jesus.
2. Parents must subject their children to the discipline of the Lord Jesus.
II. The importance of this duty. This may be proved from--
1. The state of prospects of the children themselves.
2. The circumstances and prospects of the Church of Christ. The hope of the Church in the future depends always upon the rising generation.
3. The state and necessities of the world at large.
III. The consistent, Christ-like temper in which these duties must be performed. (John Hannah, D. D.)
Christian parents
I. Caution.
1. Avoid harshness and severity of demeanour.
2. Do not overstrain the necessity of obedience.
3. Avoid the habit of constantly finding fault.
II. Counsel.
1. Exalt the Word of God. That must be the basis, foundation, rule and guide of everything. The great standard of right and wrong.
2. Exalt Christ.
3. Exalt the Spirit of God.
4. Maintain a godly jealousy of the world. (James Cohen, M. A.)
The nurture and admonition of the Lord
1. The first thing to consider is the basis of the culture--the Lord. To make a child understand fully what that means is the Alpha and Omega of Christian education. To train children of old in the nurture and admonition of the Lord was to teach them to comprehend the meaning and bearing of the great spiritual truths which the gospel brought into the world.
2. The next question concerns the method of the culture, which is described in the significant term, the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Some have supposed that in the double term there is a reference to the dual parentage, and that it describes the blending of the manly and womanly influence in the rule and culture of the home. But the original hardly looks that way. Our Revised Version has it, nurture them in the chastening and admonition of the Lord. So that the word nurture in the Authorised Version in the original bears the sterner meaning; and refers to the discipline which comes through correction; while admonition suggests counsel, advice, reproof, exhortation, and all the intellectual and moral influences whereby a young soul may be trained for its work. It is wonderful how the fatherly and motherly influences blend in Christ; the tenderest nurture, the firmest correction, the sternest chastisement, in which no child can ever miss the love. (J. B. Brown, B. A.)
Religious teaching of the young
The terms translated, nurture and admonition, were very familiar words to the Greeks. They were proud of their system of education, and, viewed from a moral point, they had reason to be so; their plans were admirably constituted for the development of the body, the culture of intellect, and the refining of the aristocratic taste in society. But between man and God there was the greatest deficiency: the vital deficiency was that which is supplied here by the apostle when he used these words, and said, In the nurture and admonition of the Lord; for it is Christianity alone which touches the mainspring of our nature, which brings all its parts into harmony with themselves, and restores, as a whole, man to the friendship and communion of God.
I. Look at some of the encouragement which we learn in the endeavour to bring them up to the Lord.
1. I would find encouragement in the general belief in a Present God. This may be said to be the starting point of a religious education.
2. We have in children comparative tenderness of conscience.
3. There is in children a comparatively prompt appreciation of the love of Christ. To a child it is not so difficult to believe in that complete self-abandonment for the good of others which was manifested in the Cross of Jesus Christ. He can more thoroughly understand in that early part of his life even than he can at a later period, when the shadows of the world are cast upon that Cross--can appreciate the love which prompted the giving Himself for us, and can return it far more than at any later period of his existence.
II. The means to be used for this purpose.
1. Instruction. It is knowledge, not ignorance, that is the mother of our devotion. We must seek, therefore, to illumine the understanding--to present to it those great objects of faith upon which the soul reposes.
2. Example. The instruction of the family is neither better nor worse than the conduct of its members: if the lessons are high and the conduct low, the effect will be low; if the lessons are imperfect, but the conduct excellent, the effect will be excellent.
3. These means must be applied and sustained in power by prayer. (C. M. Birrell.)
Parents and children
A parent is bound to his child by a tie which cannot be severed. He may delegate some of that work in which he is sure, intentionally or undesignedly, himself to bear so large a part, to tutors and governors, but he does not by that divest himself of his responsibility. This relationship is unalterable. It is not even affected by the conduct of the child. The bond is indestructible, and the duty as lasting as the bond.
I. The nature and extent of parental influence. It is evident that there is no relation in which a man exerts so much power for good or evil. There is no other from whom the child receives so many of the ideas, impressions, and habits, which are most abiding, as from his parents. The opinions which a man holds, the party with which he identifies himself, the friendships he cultivates, and the particular line of conduct he observes, all impress themselves on the mind of his child; and his views of them are affected partly by the feelings he has to his father, and partly by the opinions which they have had upon his fathers character and life. Very early is the observing power of the child awakened, and from the time that it is roused to consciousness every day adds something to its ever-increasing store. Words and looks, as well as actions, have their effect; and thus, unconsciously to themselves, the parents are constantly educating their children--educating them when they have no thought at all of the serious work which they are doing; when they are going on the way of life in their own accustomed course without recollecting that there are eager young eyes watching every movement, and listening young ears drinking in every word that is spoken, and impressible young hearts which are being trained to good or to evil by that which is thus passing before them.
II. The spirit and manner in which this responsibility should be discharged.
1. To make the unconscious influence which a man exerts a blessing, the one thing which is necessary is high-toned Christian principle. The power which goes forth from a man will be according to the spirit that is in him.
2. In the direct work of training, the first essential is that you should clearly set before your own mind the object which you have in view.
(1) Of course education by a Christian man must be religious, and distinctively Christian. And not only must this instruction be given, but wisely given--so that the religious lesson shall not be regarded as a mere task.
3. The exercise of authority is another of the means by which a parent may fulfil his duty. The one power on earth which is of Divine right in his. It is essential to the right government of the family and the proper discipline of the child. It meets him at the beginning of life with the idea, so necessary for all to realize, that in this world no human will is meant to be absolute and supreme, and that the first lesson--which everyone is to learn--is the difficult but necessary one of obedience.
3. No Christian parent will need to be reminded that he must pray for and with his children. (J. G. Begets, B. A.)
Jesus Christ the pattern, means, and end of parental training
In the nurture and admonition of the Lord. The Lord brings up His disciples; He takes them at their new birth, and educates them; He instructs and teaches them, but He does more than this, He brings them up; He forms and developes a godly character; He conforms them, by discipline and training, to the Divine image; He leads His disciples into true manhood of soul and of life. There is a nurture and admonition which the Lord adopts, and which may, with immense advantage, be imitated by every parent. The Lord exhorts, warns, and restrains. There is nurture, and there is admonition, in the bringing up of Christs disciples by their Lord. He is not like Eli, who was chargeable with great neglect, because he did not restrain his sons when they made themselves vile. The Lord Jesus Christ does restrain His disciples. When they sin He corrects them, yet He does not always chide, neither does He keep His anger for ever. He leaves some faults to wear themselves out, and other faults to die under indirect influences; but He takes care that every fault comes under some destructive influence. The Lord teaches and trains partly by His own example. Hence, when He is spoken of under the similitude of a Shepherd, it is said of Him, that He goes before His disciples, leading them, by showing them the path in which they should walk--showing them, not by His lips merely, but showing them by His own steps. Further, the Lord unites with Himself, by trust and love, those whom He brings up. His influence over them is not through the understanding and the reason merely--not simply through the intellectual faculties--but by the heart. What a melancholy sight it is in families, to see children growing up like roots in dry ground. They have hold of nothing in the home, and nothing in the home has hold upon them; there is nothing there that is congenial, just because there is nothing genial--for the genial to early life will always be congenial. Brethren, speaking of the nurture and admonition of the Lord mentioned in the text, we may really call it the nurture and admonition which the Lord adopts. We do not say that Paul had this thought when he wrote; we think he had another thought, which we shall presently try to give you: but still the thought that we now suggest is inseparably associated with that which we shall presently suggest--and therefore the remarks we have been making appear to us to be quite to the point. And if you would bring up your children aright, just see how the Lord brings you up, and imitate your heavenly Educator. But, speaking textually, the nurture and admonition of the Lord is that which the Lord directs--it is that which has the Lord for its subject, and the Lord for its object. Ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, means--Let your instruction and your training have the Lords teaching, the Lords warnings, the Lords doctrines, for their means, and the Lord Himself for their end. Let the Lord be the end of education; and let the Lords resources be the means of education. And will you also observe that both parents are charged--for the word fathers is used here, not in the specific sense, but in the generic sense: so that we may read the passage, Ye parents, train up your children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. The day was, when the mother had nothing, or very little, to do directly with instruction and education. But so soon as the position of the wife and the mother was improved and righted, so soon as she stood in her proper place by the side of the husband and father, then the father began to give her an undue share of the responsibility in bringing up the children. And what do we see now? We see the mother in many cases doing the whole work, and the father most grievously and sinfully neglecting it. This is not right. In the first place there is something due to the mother, and to the wife; why should she take a greater burden than she is able to bear? In the next place there is something due to the children. Look, further, at the common danger to parents that is here recognized--the abuse of power. The power of a parent is very great; and there is very little to check it; even the State does little here, unless the abuse of power be extraordinary. The power of a parent is, as we scarcely need remind you, almost unbounded. Do you see that the text recognizes the danger of this power being abused? Ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath. Power, more than anything else, tempts to cruelty; it is an exceedingly dangerous thing to possess--and no man in his senses will ever covet it; he will rather ask God to give him very little of it, than desire to possess it. Those who have right views of power will never be ambitious for it: but they will rather, like some of the old prophets (like Jeremiah, for instance), tremble to take it even when God puts it into their hands. We often see power make the most tender natures cruel, and the most gentle natures fierce. How often have women been rendered cruel by an increase of authority, and an increase of influence! There is danger to parents of caprice, and harshness; of giving commands, and precepts, and prohibitions, for the sake of maintaining their position, and of upholding their authority. And that is the point of the words, Ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath, but bring them up. The child is to be nourished; it is not to be driven--it is to be cherished; it is not to be forced. The incitement and the impulsion which are likely to distress and dishearten the child, are distinctly forbidden in the text. The force of the contrast must be manifest to you in a moment. The bringing them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, is placed in contrast with provoking them to wrath. The childs faults are to be corrected; but still, correction is to be so administered as not to sink the child into despondency, or drive him to despair--as not to wean the heart of the child either from father or from mother. And the education required is to be marked, as you will have seen throughout the course of these remarks, by the following features. The Lord Jesus, the Son of God, is to be its end. Children are to brought up for the Lord; for subjects in His kingdom; that is to be the ultimate end. Christs teaching is to be the means of education. The precepts and the prohibitions that are to regulate the general conduct are to be taken from Christs lips, and are to be delivered to the child in Christs name. Christs resources are to be the support of education. The parent is not supposed to be able himself to do this work; but there are put at his disposal the unsearchable riches of Christ; and if he cannot nourish his children with that which he has, he may nourish them by the wealth of his Master and Lord. The education required is to have Christs example for its standard--the parent is to: bring up as Christ brings up His followers. And it is to have Christs temper for its spirit--the educator must be meek and lowly in heart. (S. Martin, D. D.)
The fathers charge
I. The duties which parents owe to their children.
1. Children are weak and helpless, and totally incapable of caring for themselves; and hence arises the first duty which parents owe them--that of feeding and clothing them.
2. Children are ignorant, and without understanding; hence they should not only be fed, but taught. Children should be taught--
(1) Early.
(2) Familiarly.
(3) Affectionately.
(4) Extensively.
3. Children are unruly, and therefore must; be governed.
4. Children are prone to evil, and therefore must be restrained.
II. The obligations which parents are under to practise those duties.
1. They should do it for their own sake. For the credit of their own characters.
2. They should do it for their childrens sake.
3. They should do it for societys sake.
4. They should do it for Gods sake.
Conclusion:
1. Learn how careful the apostles were to instruct their converts, not only in the matters of faith, but rules of conduct descending even to the most particular duties of domestic life.
2. The practicability of a religious education.
3. How awful is the responsibility of parents. (Theological Sketchbook.)
The duty of Christian parents
I. The tie that binds the parent to his child. It is one of the most affecting of all ties. But see the deep responsibility connected with it--to say nothing of the closeness, the tenderness, and the unchangeableness of the tie--my bone, and my flesh, and my blood.
II. But observe the exhortation that is here given. At first sight it seems a sort of strange exhortation to parents, not to provoke their children to wrath. Yet there is infinite love and infinite wisdom in it; because of the very love that parents have for their children. Observe, they are not exhorted to love their children; that is not the exhortation given to them. It is supposed that they love their children; and yet, though they love their children, they may provoke them to wrath. Because there may be, and often is, an exhibition of love that does provoke them to wrath. Oh! beloved, a system of perpetual, endless, unrequired, austere restriction does it; a perpetual restriction, in which there is a practical forgetfulness of the parents duty to make his children happy. Beware of a system of perpetually finding fault. This results from the other; if there be a system of perpetual restriction in all things. But now let us come to that which is the precept before us. But, says he, instead of doing so, bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Bring them up--the same word occurs in the twenty-ninth verse of the former chapter; it is the same as nourish. It implies all tenderness, all feeling with, all feeling for, all care, all gentleness, and all love. Bring them up: just as you nourish your own flesh, caring for its life, for its welfare, and its true well-being--so bring them up. Bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Here are two points for our consideration. Here is, first of all, the bringing them up, instructing them in Divine truth; and then there is educating them in Divine things. First of all, to instruct them in Divine truth. And this, too, not in a dictatorial way, as a schoolmaster teaches his lessons; but as a father should teach his children. A good minister is one who is nourished up in the words of faith, and of good doctrine. Nourished up, by little and little, just as he is able to bear it. Besides this, beloved, there is in education--and there can hardly be, I should think, a greater mistake than to suppose that instruction in the truth, and education, mean the same things--there is in education the bringing up of a child in those principles in which he has been instructed out of Gods Word. (J. H. Evans, M. A.)
Early religious instruction
When a lady once told Archbishop Sharpe that she would not communicate religious instruction to her children until they had attained the years of discretion, the shrewd prelate replied, Madam, if you do not teach them, the devil will! (J. Whitecross.)
Training children
Be very vigilant over thy child in the April of his understanding, lest the frost of May nip his blossoms, While he is a tender twig, straighten him; whilst he is a new vessel, season him; such as thou makest him, such commonly shalt thou find him. Let his first lesson be obedience, and his second shall be what thou wilt. Give him education in good letters, to the utmost of thy ability and his capacity. Season his youth with the love of his Creator, and make the fear of his God the beginning of his knowledge. If he have an active spirit, rather rectify than curb it; but reckon idleness among his chiefest faults. As his judgment ripens, observe his inclination, and tender him a calling that shall not cross it. Forced marriages and callings seldom prosper. Show him both the mow and the plough; and prepare him as well for the danger of the skirmish, as possess him with the honour of the prize. (F. Quarles.)
Correction of children
By directing a childs attention to a fault, and thus giving it a local habitation and a name, you may often fix it in him more firmly; when, by drawing his thoughts and affections to other things, and seeking to foster an opposite grace, you would be much more likely to subdue it. In like manner a jealous disposition is often strengthened when notice is taken of it, while the endeavour to cherish a spirit of love would do much toward casting it out. (Hare.)
The time for religious education
Seize the opportunity while it lasts, before the child is inured to evil, and the sinful habit is formed. Act like the skilful physician, who tells you to apply for medical aid while the disease is in its incipient state, and not to delay until the malady has seized upon the vital organs, and is out of the reach of medicine. Now is the time to apply the moral medicine (for there is balm in Gilead, end there is a Physician there), and let it be so applied as that it work freely in these young hearts, for their healing and salvation. (Dr. R. Newton.)
Youth is the best season for communicating knowledge
If, for instance, you wish your son to learn a business, you send him to acquire it in the period of his youth; if languages are to be mastered, you admit the advantage of beginning them while young; and so it is with trades and professions. Now, men know this, and act accordingly in matters relating to this life. And shall men of this world be wiser in their generation than the children of light? Surely Christianity is a science, whose interest and importance are immeasurably above every other. Christianity is the Divine science of human salvation. O! then, begin to teach your children this Divine science while they are yet young. (Dr. R. Newton.)
Right habits must be inculcated in youth
If man be trained in early life to right habits--habits of religion, habits of virtue, truth, righteousness, and piety--it is to be expected that these habits, being truly formed, will grow with his growth, and strengthen with his strength. We have seen this principle repeatedly illustrated. For example, you have perhaps inserted characters in the tender bark of the young tree; and if you return to the tree in the next season, you then find that these characters have become wider and deeper than they were when you placed them there. So it is with the character of truth imprinted in the young and tender mind. It has been remarked that a vessel generally retains the savour of the liquid with which it was first seasoned so long as any part of the vessel remains. How true does this observation apply to the mental constitution of youth! And how important, then, that it should have the seasoning of the right kind--the seasoning of true piety, love to God, and love to man! A distinguished metaphysician had observed that of all the men passing through life, nine out of ten are what they are, virtuous or vicious, religious or irreligious, according to their education during the period of childhood and youth. (Dr. R. Newton.)
Religious training should begin early
If you should certainly know that in five years hence your boy, who is now a little child, would fall into a deep river all alone, you would not wait till the event should happen ere you prepared to meet it. You would begin now the process which would be safety then. Your child cannot swim, and you are not qualified to teach him; but forthwith you would acquire the art yourself, that you might communicate it to him, and that he might be prepared to meet the emergency. Now, beyond all peradventure, your child, if he survive, will in a few years be plunged into a sea of wickedness, through which he must swim for his life. Nothing but right moral principles, obtained from the Bible, and indurated by early training into a confirmed habit, will give him the necessary buoyancy. Hence, as you would preserve your child from sinking through the sea of sin into final perdition, you are hound to qualify yourself for training him up in the way he should go. (W. Arnot, D. D.)
Training not to wait for years of discretion
Thalwell thought it very unfair to influence a childs mind by inculcating any opinions before it had come to years of discretion to choose for itself. I showed him my garden, and told him that it was a botanical garden. How so? said he; it is covered with weeds. Oh, I replied, that is only because it has not yet come to its age of discretion and choice. The weeds, you see, have taken the liberty to grow, and thought it unfair in me to prejudice the soil towards roses and strawberries. (S. T. Coleridge.)
Early devotion to God
It is of the last importance to season the passions of a child with devotion, which seldom dies in a mind that has received an early tincture of it. Though it may seem extinguished for a while by the cares of the world, the heats of youth, or the allurements of vice, it generally breaks out and discovers itself again as soon as discretion, consideration, age, or misfortunes have brought the man to himself. The fire may be covered and overlaid, hut cannot be entirely quenched and smothered. (Addison.)
Obedience to parents
I. An urgent command. Do your duty to your father and mother. This may be taken to include those who occupy the place of a parent--a grandfather or grandmother, or uncle or aunt, or friend or guardian. I shall try to bring out the spirit of this command in a few short remarks.
1. Honour your parents. Our words to our parents should be respectful: we should honour them in our speaking. I am amazed and grieved to hear how some children speak to their fathers and mothers--to hear the pert, disrespectful, impudent answers they sometimes give them. Our looks and gestures should be respectful. Do you see that little fellow, who has been found fault with, or has not got what he wanted? What a face he puts on--what ill-nature shows itself in these pouting lips--what revenge and defiance there is in that fiery eye--what a scowl on his young face! But he does not say anything; perhaps he does not dare. I wish you would remember that your eye and lips may sin, as well as your tongue and hand. Our actions--our general conduct and behaviour towards them, should be respectful We may do things, that are right in themselves, in a very disrespectful way--ungraciously, offensively. Where there is some infirmity--where, for instance, a parent is deaf, or lame, or sick, or ill-behaved, this is very apt to be. We do what is asked or wished, but we do it with a very bad grace. The same may be said of the way in which we receive and treat their instructions, it may be carelessly, heartlessly. Then there is such a thing as being ashamed of our parents--when they are poor, when they are not so well educated as we are. It was not so with Joseph, one of the first princes of Egypt, when he presented his old shepherd-father to the king, and was as proud of him as if he had been a king too.
2. Obey your parents. It is not enough to pay them respect, in a general way: they must be obeyed. To say No to a parent, is to run directly in the face of Gods law. And we may not choose what commands we shall obey, and what we shall not. And so I shall pass on to say something about the kind of obedience that should be rendered.
(1) Our obedience should be without questioning. Some children have a very bad trick of asking a reason for everything.
(2) Our obedience should be prompt. The thing asked should be done at once. Much depends on this. A parent should never require to repeat his command. To wait for a second bidding is just next to refusing. We might often learn important lessons from the lower animals, and not least from dogs, which, when well trained, are remarkable for their obedience. Let me tell you a story which brings out strikingly the advantage of prompt obedience. There was a dog that was growing old and deaf, belonging to one of the officials at a railway station. One day the dog was coming leisurely along between the two lines of rail, when the express train appeared, and screeching out its shrill whistle, came dashing on, as you have seen the express do. The poor dog could hear no sound, the train was close behind, there was no way of giving him warning in time to get off the line, and there seemed nothing for it but that the poor brute should be killed on the spot. His master, however, by a well-known sign with his finger, ordered the dog to lie down; in a moment he lay flat on the ground; and in less time than I have taken to tell the story, the train had passed over him, and left him unharmed. His prompt obedience saved his life.
(3) Our obedience should be cheerful. It should be not of constraint, but willingly. Compulsory obedience is not right obedience. We should not obey sulkily, making it plain that we only do the thing because we must.
3. Love your parents. It is not enough to pay them outward respect--to make a point of obeying them: you must love them. They love you, and nothing will satisfy them but your love in return. A poor woman once came to me, almost broken-hearted, and told me this story. She had been calling on her daughter, a young servant girl, in a good situation. When the daughter opened the door and saw who was there, she threw a shilling to her, as if she had been a beggar, said she was afraid lest her mistress should come, and shut the door in her mothers face, leaving her staggering under the rebuff. I think I see that mother yet, as she said to me, What was my daughters money to me, when I had lost her love?
4. Be kind to your parents. If you really love them, you will be kind to them. Anticipate their wishes, and give them a pleasant surprise. I might mention many beautiful instances of kindness to parents. I have heard of an American Indian chief who was taken prisoner with his son, and, with heavy chains on his limbs, was cast into prison. The chief whose prisoner he is, has no child, and wishes to adopt the boy as his son. He brings out rich ornaments for the wrists and ankles, such as the Indians delight to wear, and tells him to choose whatever he likes. One by one the boy takes them up and looks at them; but his thoughts go back to his father in his dungeon, and for him he gives up all. As you give me my choice, his reply is, I had rather wear such as my father wears--a chain! See that youth, respectable and well educated, who has been unable to get money otherwise, and now offers to enlist as a soldier, provided he gets a good bounty. What does the lad mean? His old father is in prison for debt: the son would do anything to get him released; he gets the bounty asked, and though it may cost him many a year of hardship and danger, he hurries to the well-known cell, takes his father in his arms, and tells him he is free! Or look into this humble home. On a bed lies a sick man, so helpless that his wife can do little else than wait upon him. She cannot go out to wash or work. People wonder how they live, for they get no parish aid. Do you see that little girl of twelve? How nimbly her fingers are going! Every morning she is up at four; it is nothing but stitch, stitch, stitch with her, all the day. She is the little bread winner for the household.
5. Value your parents. Well you may. You will never find the like of them again. You will not have them long. Prize them while you have them. And here let me put in a word for aged parents. When a father or a mother grows old, the duty to support and show kindness to and bear with them, becomes increasingly binding.
II. A precious promise--That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. I can but touch on this.
1. God says, Obedience will be pleasing to Him. It is implied in the promise, that God will approve it.
2. God says, It will be a blessing to yourself. It shall be well with thee: thou shalt live long, etc. (J. H. Wilson.)
Counsels for education
I. The first thing to which we invite your attention, is, the best method of communicating religious knowledge.
1. Now, among the first rules we would give for the communication of religious knowledge to children, we would say, avoid bringing before them all points of abstract doctrine. Do not suppose it needful that you should bring under their notice any system of divinity, as a system. Be careful to impress upon their minds those moral facts, which lead to the doctrines, rather than to state the doctrines and then prove them by the facts.
2. There is another direction, which I think very important, with regard to the instruction of the young; and that is, that in all our statements of truth, and in all our illustrations of doctrine, we should be careful that every illustration we employ be as circumscribed, as confined, as narrow in its range, as possible.
3. There is one general direction more that we would give with regard to the inculcation of religious knowledge; and that is, that we should do all we can to encourage habits of inquiry, of reflection, and of moral thoughtfulness.
II. We now proceed to the second part of our subject, where the observations, it is obvious, will apply to those of a more advanced age, as well as to children. We mean, the offering rules for persuading them to a religious practice.
1. The first rule we would give, is this: that you make the service of God appear delightful service.
2. Another direction is, that you acquire the habit of turning passing events to a spiritual account.
3. Another direction is, that you endeavour to find out their first and strongest tendency to evil.
4. Another direction we would give, is, that you administer reproof on Bible principles, and in a Bible spirit.
5. One more direction is, that ye encourage the small beginnings of the good work. Two practical directions for yourselves, in conclusion, will finish our subject. First, let your exhortations be strengthened by example; secondly, let your example be sanctified by your prayers. (D. Moore, M. A.)
Parental claims
I. First, allow me to direct your attention to the nature of parental claims.
1. In the first place, then, parental claims require implicit; obedience so long as the child is dependent on the parent.
2. Secondly, parental claims require affectionate and reverential deference in every period of life.
3. In the third place, parental claims extend to support in times of weakness, sickness, and old age.
II. In the second place, then, let us consider the authority by which these claims are enforced.
1. First, they are enforced by the decisions of the moral law. You know that one of the most prominent and oft-repeated of the ancient commandments delivered by Moses to the Jewish nation, was this, Honour thy father and thy mother.
2. Secondly, this duty is enforced by the principles and precepts of the New Testament dispensation. Thus, when the Saviour came, the record concerning Him was that He went down and was subject to His parents.
3. In the third place, iris enforced by the nature and claims of human society. Society is but an aggregate of individuals, and men are just what they are at home.
4. In the fourth place, it is enforced by the important connection which this duty has with the formation of individual character. Any individual who has been remarkable as an excellent son, will become a good father, a good husband, a good friend, a good member of society, in whatever place he may be found.
5. In the last place, it is enforced by the strongest commands of gratitude.
III. Allow me, then, in the third place, to notice some of those restrictions by which these claims are limited.
1. First, then, they are modified by the claims of religion. The gospel in every respect is supreme. Our allegiance to the Deity is higher and of more importance than our allegiance to any and all the forms of domestic and social life.
2. In the second place, it is restricted by the laws of society of which the individual may be a member, and by the principles of unchanging morals, every individual feels that society at large is of much more importance, and therefore has a greater claim, than the domestic circle. Consequently, if a law in itself right or necessary for social existence shall enjoin anything, parental authority shall not countervail it.
3. In the third place, their claims are marked and modified by the usages and constitutions of society. All our domestic arrangements partake, to a greater or less extent, of the nature of law. In many countries you know children are, or have been, regarded as the property of their parents. So long as the parent survives, it is impossible for them to hold property of any kind, or to command the services, excepting subordinate and secondary, of any agent. It has been impossible that they should devote themselves to this or that enterprise, except at the suggestion and determination of the parents will. In fact they are slaves--complete slaves; body, soul, and spirit regarded as the goods and chattels of the parent. We feel that this runs counter to the everlasting law; that it is not right that slavery in any form should exist; and consequently we should not feel ourselves bound essentially on such a principle as that, merely on its own account, if there were no other supervening law to enforce duty under those circumstances upon us. In the East, for example, and among the Jews, till a young man attained thirty years of age, this parental control was most complete; it extended to such physical chastisement as the parent should demand, while it was regarded as the highest crime to resist or oppose that chastisement, however condign, afflictive, or humiliating it might be. Under such circumstances as these, we feel our feelings would revolt.
4. In the last place, these claims are modified by individual character and conduct. I do not mean to say that improper conduct on the part of the parent essentially vitiates, much less destroys, the claims which the parent has for obedience and reverence. But I do mean to say that there is a law of nature which acting invariably will, if it does not destroy, greatly modify those claims, in the responses with which they shall be met. If the conscience is not controlled, if the understanding is not convinced, the very moment such is the case the claims of the individual are to a great extent modified. Now, it is just so in the domestic circle. If your example shall be contrary to righteousness and truth, two things will follow: first, your authority will be vitiated, because all true obedience, such as is connected with affection and reverence, must be secured, in greater or less measure, by the action of moral influence; but a corrupt father cannot exercise such influence, and consequently full and true obedience cannot by him be secured. The external form may remain, but the inward life and power must be wanting. A second thing will ensue; example speaks louder than words: there will be two authorities, two commandments. Further: if your commands shall be unduly severe--if they shall be, moreover, manifestly intended to secure exclusively your own interest--if they shall savour of selfishness in every utterance and in every demand, you may secure obedience, perhaps, but you cannot secure love. (J. Aldis.)
Religious instruction for children
Would mathematical science thrive if Euclid and the Principia were to cease from the studies of our youth: Would the public watchfulness of the people over their rulers thrive if they were to refrain from perusing the daily intelligence, and conversing of public affairs? Will religion thrive if the Word of God be not studied and its topics conferred on? If at that season when our youth of first family and ambition are preparing their minds for guiding affairs, by courses of early discipline in public schools, and those of second rank are entered to the various professions of life, if then no pains be taken to draw their attention to the sacred writings, and impress principles of piety and virtue upon their minds, how can it be expected that religion should even have a chance? One cannot always be learning; youth is for learning, manhood for acting, and old age for enjoying the fruits of both. I ask, Why, when the future lawyer is studying Blackstone or Lyttleton; the future physician, Hippocrates and Sydenham; the future economist, Smith and Malthus; the future statesman, Locke and Sydney; each that he may prepare for filling a reputable station in the present world--Why is the future immortal not at the same time studying the two Testaments of God, in order to prepare for the world to come, in which every one of us hath a more valuable stake? If immortality be nothing but the conjuration of priests to cheat the world, then let it pass, and our books go to the wind like the sibyls leaves; but if immortality be neither the dream of fond enthusiasts, nor the trick of artful priests, but the revelation of the righteous God; then let us have the literature and the science, and the practice for the long after-stage of our being, as well as for the present time, which is but its porch. These pleadings are to men who believe immortality; therefore justify your belief, and show your gratitude by taking thought and pains about the great concerns of that immortality which you believe. (Irving.)
Children should look to Jesus
Godly children are Gods workmanship, created by Jesus Christ, and if we would be the means of leading children into true godliness, we must bid them to look to our Saviour Jesus. I say to Him, not at Him. Some who have to do with the religious instruction of children, require them to look at Christ instead of to Him. There is a vast difference between these things. The child looks at the queen, when he goes to see her proceed in state to open the Parliament; but he looks to his mother, when he relies on her for the supply of his daily wants. We look at the statue, say of Jenner, or of Abernethy; but we look to our medical attendant for advice and healing. We look at Pitt or Fox, as they now stand before us in marble or stone; but we look to the Prime Minister of the day for the conduct of our national affairs. We Christians know for ourselves, that it is not by looking at Jesus, as at a great sight, but we are saved; but by looking to Him, as to a loving, personal Redeemer; therefore, in speaking to children of the Son of God, it is important to speak of Him, not as of a Being to be looked at, but looked unto. (Samuel Martin, D. D.)
Treatment of children
There is in all things, and in all souls, an element which should rather be allayed than stirred up. It is well that the force is there, for the feeding and enlivening of all the powers. Latent and under command, it is invaluable; but when it assumes authority, and mounts into self-manifestation, it is harmful and destructive. Parents, therefore, must carefully abstain from provoking the evil element which is in their children. Show them by their own example how the wrathful power can be made subservient to their energy and cheerfulness, and at the same time kept under perfect control. When, instead of possessing your soul in patience, you lose yourselves in a ferment of excitement, you suffer a serious loss of dignity in the eyes of your children. The force of your authority is gone. How can children honour from the heart that which is destitute of honour? How can they reverence you, if you lose your majesty? God calls you to the high and blessed office of representing Him and heaven to your children. There is in your children not only the wrathful element from you, but also a spirit of great sweetness from their Heavenly Father. The Jesus-Spirit is Gods seed, and it is sown in all the race. No child of Adam is wholly the seed of the serpent: the seed of the woman is in every man that cometh into the world. The manifestation of the Spirit is given to every man to profit withal. The Jesus-Spirit is the essential Spirit of humanity, without which salvation were an impossibility. Parents and teachers, address yourselves to this Divine ground in your children. (J. Pulsford.)
A lesson to parents
Oh, mamma; dont take my pretty broom to sweep the stairs, please dont! This came in shrill tones from Bessie, as she danced into the front hall and came suddenly in front of her mother, who considered that she had found an excellent tool in the shape of her daughters new broom. It was a present to Bessie from the old broom maker round the corner, and because he had taken great pains in its manufacture it was an unusually good one and pleasant for anybody to use. As might be supposed, its chief merit to a six-year-old child was its gaily painted handle. She had always kept it among her treasures, and was horrified now to find it in use, like any common broom. The work Mrs. Allen had laid out for that day was enough for three days. There was a cake to be made, and everything to be put in perfect order for company to tea. Perfect order, in the mind of this fastidious woman, meant a great amount of labour. With no help but an inexperienced girl, not a moment was to be lost. So she worked in nervous haste, taking no notice of Bessies protest, except to say: Be quiet, child; you will be heard in the street. I want my broom, please, mamma, persisted Bessie. What a selfish little girl! For shame! her mother said, sharply, sweeping vigorously at the same time. Oh, dont use it so hard, my dear little broom, pleaded Bessie--tears rolling down her cheeks. Youll spoil it, mamma; you truly will. If I spoil it Ill get you another. Get out of my way now, quick! Another broom wont do, sobbed Bessie, growing more excited at this suggestion. I want to keep this one always, cause old Mr. Strong made it for me, and he likes me. It shant be used, I shall put it away;--and, springing up the stairs, she clasped her arms about her treasure. The mothers patience was by this time quite exhausted. She angrily wrenched the broom from Bessies hands, then seized and half carried her up the stairs, and thrust her into the room in no gentle manner, bidding her to stay until she called her. Bessie was not a difficult child to manage, nor was her mother a hard woman. It needed but a little loving tact on her part, and the little girl would have been happy in lending her broom. But, poor mother, she had allowed herself to become nervous and tired and heated through much serving, and so she forgot that she was outraging an innate sense of justice which the Lord Himself had placed in the childs heart--forgot, too, that it had been written, Provoke not your children to wrath. Her worries and cares and the entertaining of friends so absorbed Mrs. Allen that she gave her little daughter but slight attention during the rest of the day. It was not until evening that she discovered Bessie to be in a burning fever, and complaining of a sore throat. She remembered then with a pang that the usually amiable child had been irritable all day, which should have led her to suspect something wrong. All through the night they watched the little one while she tossed and moaned, murmuring words in delirium that pierced the mothers heart like a knife, for it was all about a little broom, pitiful pleadings--Please, mamma, please dont; then drawing her white brow into frowns, would scream out, Its mine, I say; you must not take my broom! The best medical skill and the tenderest nursing could not avail. For two days they fought with the terrible disease, and then they gathered about the darling to give her the last kiss. They thought she would never speak again, but the blue eyes suddenly opened; they looked lovingly into her mothers, and Bessie said: Mamma, good-bye! You may take my little broom: you may keep if forever--forgive Bessie cause she was naughty; and then the sweet mouth was put up for a kiss. The next instant the mothers kiss fell on still lips. Do you wonder that for many years afterwards the most torturing, heart breaking sight to her in all the world was a little broom? Oh, dear mothers, it is well to be fine housekeepers and to entertain ones friends handsomely; but as we go bustling about, let us not load ourselves with such a weight of harassing cares that we have no time to be just, and tender, and patient with even the little whims and fancies of our darlings. When we come to lay them down to their last sleep, our sorrow will be keen enough without the stabs which memory with cruel faithfulness will inflict. Not a harsh word or unjust action will be forgotten then. (Christian Globe.)
Repression and fault finding
Life for some children is one perpetual dont. Our sympathies were recently enlisted for Freddie, a little fellow of five, who had been kept within doors during a long storm. His mother, a gentle woman, sat quietly sewing, as she chatted with a friend. Dont do that, Freddie, she said, as the childs whip handle beat a light tattoo on the carpet. The whip dropped. A block castle rose--and fell with a crash. Dont make a noise, Freddie. The boy turned to the window, the restless fingers making vague pictures on the damp pane. Dont mark the window, Freddie, interposed his mother; and Dont go into the hall, she added, as he opened the door to escape. The donts continued at brief intervals. At length the small man, seating himself with a pathetically resigned air, remained perfectly still for about a minute. Then, with a long drawn sigh, he asked, Mamma, is there anything that I can do? Sometimes dont seems a mere mechanical utterance, unheeded by the child, and unenforced by the parent. Dont do that, my dear; and the little girl, tossing over the fine engravings on a friends table, pauses an instant. The mother goes on talking with her friend, the child resumes her occupation, and no notice is taken of it, except, after awhile, the prohibition is carelessly repeated, only to be ignored. A forgetful mother makes a forgetful child. Authority is weakened by reiterated commands. (Christian Age.)
The claims of children
Dr. Leonard Bacon once preached a sermon on what he called the obverse side of the Fifth Commandment--the duty of parents to be worthy of honour. The child is born into the world with this right. His pure eyes look to his elders for example. His soul waits for impulse and inspiration from them. Woe unto that parent who, by unworthy character, causes one of these little ones to stumble; it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depths of the sea. (Christian Union)
The Biblical Illustrator, edited by Joseph S. Exell (c. 1880s–1900s) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
The Expositor's Bible 1887 · Public Domain On v1 Chapter 27
Chapter 27
THE CHRISTIAN HOUSEHOLD
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Eph_6:1-9
THE Christian family is the cradle and the fortress of the Christian faith. Here its virtues shine most brightly; and by this channel its influence spreads through society and the course of generations. Marriage has been placed under the guardianship of God; it is made single, chaste, and enduring, according to the law of creation and the pattern of Christs union with His Church. With parents thus united, family honour is secure; and a basis is laid for reverence and discipline within the house.
I. Thus the apostle turns, in the opening words of chapter 6, from the husband and wife to the children of the household. He addresses them as present in the assembly where his letter is read. St. Paul accounted the children "holy," if but one parent belonged to the Church. {1Co_7:14} They were baptised, as we presume, with their fathers or mothers, and admitted, under due precautions, to the fellowship of the Church so far as their age allowed. We cannot limit this exhortation to children of adult age. The "discipline and admonition of the Lord," prescribed in Eph_6:4, belong to children of tender years and under parental control.
Obedience is the law of childhood. It is, in great part, the childs religion, to be practised "in the Lord." The reverence and love, full of a sweet mystery, which the Christian child feels towards its Saviour and heavenly King, add new sacredness to the claims of father and mother. Jesus Christ, the Head over all things, is the orderer of the life of boys and girls. His love and His might guard the little one in the tendance of its parents. The wonderful love of parents to their offspring, and the awful authority with which they are invested, come from the source of human life in God. The Latin pietas impressed a religious character upon filial duty. This word signifies at once dutifulness towards the gods, and towards parents and kindred. In the strength of its family ties and its deep filial reverence lay the secret of the moral vigour and the unmatched discipline of the Roman commonwealth. The history of ancient Rome affords a splendid illustration of the fifth commandment.
For this is right, says the apostle, appealing to the instincts of natural religion. The childs conscience begins here. Filial obedience is the primary form of duty. The loyalties of afterlife take their colour from the lessons learnt at home, in the time of dawning reason and incipient will. Hard indeed is the evil to remove, where in the plastic years of childhood obedience has been associated with base fear, with distrust or deceit, where it has grown sullen or obsequious in habit. From this root of bitterness there spring rank growths of hatred toward authority, jealousies, treacheries, and stubbornness. Obedience rendered "in the Lord" will be frank and willing, careful and constant, such as that which Jesus rendered to the Father.
St. Paul reminds the children of the law of the Ten Words, taught to them in their earliest lessons from Scripture. He calls the command in question "a first [or chief] commandment"-just as the great rule, "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God," is the first commandment; for this is no secondary rule or minor precept, but one on which the continuance of the Church and the welfare of society depend. It is a law fundamental as birth itself, written not on the statute-book alone, but on the tables of the heart.
Moreover, it is a "command in promise"-that takes the form of promise, and holds out to obedience a bright future. The two predicates-"first" and "in promise"-as we take it, are distinct. To merge them into one blunts their meaning. This commandment is primary in its importance, and promissory in its import. The promise is quoted from Exo_20:12, as it stands in the Septuagint, where the Greek Christian children would read it. But the last clause is abbreviated; St. Paul writes "upon the earth" in place of "the good land which the Lord thy God giveth thee." This blessing is the heritage of dutiful children in every land. Those who have watched the history of godly families of their acquaintance, will have seen the promise verified. The obedience of childhood and youth rendered to a wise Christian rule forms in the young nature the habits of self-control and self-respect, of diligence and promptitude and faithfulness and kindliness of heart, which are the best guarantees for happiness and success in life. Through parental nurture "godliness" secures its "promise of the life that now is."
Children are exhorted to submission: fathers to gentleness. "Do not," the apostle says, "anger your children"; in the corresponding place in Colossians, "Do not irritate your children, lest they be disheartened." {Eph_3:21} In these parallel texts two distinct verbs are rendered by the one English word "provoke." The Colossian passage warns against the chafing effect of parental exactions and fretfulness, that tend to break the childs spirit and spoil its temper. Our text warns the father against angering his child by unfair or oppressive treatment. From this verb comes the noun "wrath" (or "provocation") used in Eph_4:26, denoting that stirring of anger which gives peculiar occasion to the devil.
Not that the father is forbidden to cross his childs wishes, or to do anything or refuse anything that may excite its anger. Nothing is worse for a child than to find that parents fear its displeasure, and that it will gain its ends by passion. But the father must not be exasperating, must not needlessly thwart the childs inclinations and excite in order to subdue its anger, as some will do even of set purpose, thinking that in this way obedience is learnt. This policy may secure submission; but it is gained at the cost of a rankling sense of injustice.
Household rule should be equally firm and kind, neither provoking nor avoiding the displeasure of its subjects, inflicting no severity for severitys sake, but shrinking from none that fidelity demands. With much parental fondness, there is sometimes in family government a want of seriousness and steady principle, an absence in father or mother of the sense that they are dealing with moral and responsible beings in their little ones, and not with toys, which is reflected in the caprice and self-indulgence of the childrens maturer life. Such parents will give account hereafter of their stewardship with an inconsolable grief.
It is almost superfluous to insist on the apostles exhortation to treat children kindly. For them these are days of Paradise, compared with times not far distant. Never were the wants and the fancies of these small mortals catered for as they are now. In some households the danger lies in the opposite extreme from that of over-strictness. The children are idolised. Not their comfort and welfare only, but their humours and caprices become the law of the house. They are "nourished" indeed, but not "in the discipline and admonition of the Lord." It is a great unkindness to treat our children so that they shall be strangers to hardship and restriction, so that they shall not know what real obedience means, and have no reverence for age, no habits of deference and self-denial. It is the way to breed monsters of selfishness, pampered creatures who will be useless and miserable in adult life.
"Discipline and admonition" are distinguished as positive and negative terms. The first is the "training up of the child in the way that he should go"; the second checks and holds him back from the ways in which he should not go. The former word (paideia)-denoting primarily treating-as-a-boy- signifies very often "chastisement"; but it has a wider sense, embracing instruction besides. It includes the whole course of training by which the boy is reared into a man. -Admonition is a still more familiar word with St. Paul. It may be reproof bearing upon errors in the past; or it may be warning, that points out dangers lying in the future. Both these services parents owe to their children. Admonition implies faults in the nature of the child, and wisdom in the father to see and correct them.
"Foolishness," says the Hebrew proverb, "is bound up in the heart of a child." In the Old Testament discipline there was something over-stern. The "hardness of heart" censured by the Lord Jesus, which allowed of two mothers in the house, put barriers between the father and his offspring that rendered "the rod of correction" more needful than it is under the rule of Christ. But correction, in gentler or severer sort, there must be, so long as children spring from sinful parents. The childs conscience responds to the kindly and searching word of reproof, to the admonition of love. This faithful dealing with his children wins for the father in the end a deep gratitude, and makes his memory a guard in days of temptation and an object of tender reverence. The childs "obedience in the Lord" is its response to "the discipline and admonition of the Lord" exercised by its parents. The discipline which wise Christian fathers give their children, is the Lords discipline applied through them. "Correction and instruction should proceed from the Lord and be directed by the Spirit of the Lord, in such a way that it is not so much the father who corrects his children and teaches them, as the Lord through him" (Monod). Thus the Father of whom every family on earth is named, within each Christian house works all in all. Thus the chief Shepherd, through His under-shepherds, guides and feeds the lambs of His flock. By the gate of His fold fathers and mothers themselves have entered; and the little ones follow with them. In the pastures of His word they nourish them, and rule them with His rod and staff. To their offspring they become an image of the Good Shepherd and the Father in heaven. Their office teaches them more of Gods fatherly ways with themselves. From their childrens humbleness and confidence, from their simple wisdom, their hopes and fears and ignorances, the elders learn deep and affecting lessons concerning their own relations to the heavenly Father. St. Pauls instruction to fathers applies to all who have the charge of children: to schoolmasters of every degree, whose work, secular as it may be called, touches the springs of moral life and character; to teachers in the Sunday school, successors to the work that Christ assigned to Peter, of shepherding His lambs. These instructors supply the Lords nurture to multitudes of children, in whose homes Christian faith and example are wanting. The ideas which children form of Christ and His religion are gathered from what they see and hear in the school. Many a child receives its bias for life from the influence of the teacher before whom it sits on Sunday. The love and meekness of wisdom, or the coldness or carelessness of the one who thus stands between Christ and the infant soul, will make or mar its spiritual future.
II. From the children of the house the apostle proceeds to address the servants-slaves as they were, until the gospel unbound their chains. The juxtaposition of children and slaves is full of significance; it is a tacit prophecy of emancipation. It brings the slave within the household, and gives a new dignity to domestic service.
The Greek philosophers regarded slavery as a fundamental institution, indispensable to the existence of civilised society. That the few might enjoy freedom and culture, the many were doomed to bondage. Aristotle defines the slave as an "animated tool," and the tool as an "inanimate slave." Two or three facts will suffice to show how utterly slaves were deprived of human rights in the brilliant times of the classic humanism. In Athens it was the legal rule to admit the evidence of a slave only upon torture, as that of a freeman was received upon oath. Amongst the Romans, if a master had been murdered in his house, the whole of his domestic servants, amounting sometimes to hundreds, were put to death without inquiry. It was a common mark of hospitality to assign to a guest a female slave for the night, like any other convenience. Let it be remembered that the slave population outnumbered the free citizens of the Roman and Greek cities by many times; that they were frequently of the same race, and might be even superior in education to their masters. Indeed, it was a lucrative trade to rear young slaves and train them in literary and other accomplishments, and then to let them out in these capacities for hire. Let any one consider the condition of society which all this involved, and he will have some conception of the degradation in which the masses of mankind were plunged, and of the crushing tyranny that the world laboured under in the boasted days of republican liberty and Hellenic art. No wonder that the new religion was welcome to the slaves of the Pagan cities, and that they flocked into the Church. Welcome to them was the voice that said: "Come unto me, all ye that are burdened and heavy laden"; welcome the proclamation that made them Christs freedmen, "brethren beloved" where they had been "animated tools". {Phm_1:16} In the light of such teaching, slavery was doomed. Its read option by Christian nations, and the imposition of its yoke upon the negro race, is amongst the great crimes of history, -a crime for which the white man has had to pay rivers of his blood.
The social fabric, as it then existed, was so entirely based upon slavery, that for Christ and the apostles to have proclaimed its abolition would have meant universal anarchy. In writing to Philemon about his converted slave Onesimus, the apostle does not say, "Release him," though the word seems to be trembling on his lips. In 1Co_7:20-24 he even advises the slave who has the chance of manumission to remain where he is, content to be "the Lords freedman." To the Christian slave what mattered it who ruled over his perishing body! his spirit was free, death would be his discharge and enfranchisement. No decree is issued to abolish bond-service between man and man; but it was destroyed in its essence by the spirit of Christian brotherhood. It melted away in the spread of the gospel, as snow and winter melt before the face of spring.
"Ye slaves, obey your lords according to the flesh." The apostle does not disguise the slaves subservience; nor does he speak in the language of pity or of condescension. He appeals as a man to men and equals, on the ground of a common faith and service to Christ. He awakens in these degraded tools of society the sense of spiritual manhood, of conscience and loyalty, of love and faith and hope. As in Col_3:22-25 thru Col_4:1, the apostle designates the earthly master not by his common title (despotes), but by the very word (kyrios) that is the title of the Lord Christ, giving the slave in this way to understand that he has, in common with his master (Eph_6:9), a higher Lord in the spirit. "Ye are slaves to the Lord Christ!" {Col_3:24} St. Paul is accustomed to call himself "a slave of Christ Jesus." Nay, it is even said, in Php_2:7, that Christ Jesus "took the form of a slave"! How much there was, then, to console the Christian bondman for his lot. In self-abnegation, in the willing forfeiture of personal rights, in his menial and unrequited tasks, in submission to insult and injustice, he found a holy joy. His was a path in which he might closely follow the steps of the great Servant of mankind. His position enabled him to "adorn the Saviours doctrine" above other men. {Tit_2:9-10} Affectionate, gentle, bearing injury with joyful courage, the Christian. slave held up to that hardened and jaded Pagan age the example which it most required. God chose the base things of the world to bring to nought the mighty.
The relations of servant and master will endure, in one shape or other, while the world stands. And the apostles injunctions bear upon servants of every order. We are all, in our various capacities, servants of the community. The moral worth of our service and its blessing to ourselves depend on the conditions that are here laid down.
I. There must be a genuine care for our work.
"Obey," he says, "with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as unto the Christ." The fear enjoined is no dread of human displeasure, of the masters whip or tongue. It is the same "fear and trembling" with which we are bidden to "work out our own salvation". {Php_2:12} The inward work of the souls salvation and the outward work of the busy hands labouring in the mine or at the loom, or in the lowliest domestic duties, -all alike are to be performed under a solemn responsibility to God and in the presence of Christ, the Lord of nature and of men, who understands every sort of work, and will render to each of His servants a just and exact reward. No man, whether he be minister of state or stable-groom, will dare to do heedless work, who lives and acts in that august Presence, -
"As ever in the great Task-masters eye."
II. The sense of Christs Lordship ensures honesty in work.
So the apostle continues: "Not with eye-service, as men-pleasers." Both these are rare compound words, -the former indeed occurring only here and in the companion letter, being coined, probably, by the writer for this use. It is the common fault and temptation of servants in all degrees to observe the masters eye, and to work busily or slackly as they are watched or not. Such workmen act as they do, because they look to men and not to God. Their work is without conscience and self-respect. The visible master says "Well done!" But there is another Master looking on who says "Ill done!" to all pretentious doings and works o eye-service, -who sees not as man sees, but judges with the act the motive and intent.
"Not on the vulgar mass
Called work must sentence pass,
Things done, which took the eye and had the price."
In His book of accounts there is a stern reckoning in store for deceitful dealers and the makers-up of unsound goods, in whatever handicraft or headcraft they are engaged.
Let us all adopt St. Pauls maxim; it will be an immense economy. What armies of overlookers and inspectors we shall be able to dismiss, when every servant works as well behind his masters back as to his face, when every manufacturer and shopkeeper puts himself in the purchasers place and deals as he would have others deal with him. It was for the Christian slaves of the Greek trading cities to rebuke the Greek spirit of fraud and trickery, by which the common dealings of life in all directions were vitiated.
III. To the carefulness and honesty of the slaves daily labour he must even add heartiness: "as slaves of Christ doing the will of God from the soul, with good will doing service, as to the Lord and not to men."
They must do the will of God in the service of men, as Jesus Christ Himself did it, -and with His meekness and fortitude and unwearied love. Their work will thus be rendered from inner principle, with thought and affection and resolution spent upon it. That alone is the work of a man, whether he preaches or ploughs, which comes from the soul behind the hands and the tongue, into which the workman puts as much of his soul, of himself, as the work is capable of holding.
IV. Add to all this the servants anticipation of the final reward. In each case, "whatsoever one may do that is good, this he will receive from the Lord, whether he be a bondman or a freeman." The complementary truth is given in the Colossian letter: "He who does wrong, will receive back the wrong that he did."
The doctrine of equal retribution at the judgment-seat of Christ matches that of equal salvation at the cross of Christ. How trifling and evanescent the differences of earthly rank appear, in view of these sublime realities. There is a "Lord in heaven," alike for servant and for master, "with whom is no respect of persons" (Eph_6:9). This grand conviction beats down all caste-pride. It teaches justice to the mighty and the proud; it exalts the humble, and assures the down-trodden of redress. No bribery or privilege, no sophistry or legal cunning will avail, no concealment or distortion of the facts will be possible in that Court of final appeal. The servant and the master, the monarch and his meanest subject will stand before the bar of Jesus Christ upon the same footing. And the poor slave, wonderful to think, who was faithful in the "few things" of his drudging earthly lot, will receive the "many things" of a son of God and a joint-heir with Christ!
"And, ye lords, do the same things towards them"-be as good to your slaves as they are required to be towards you. A bold application this of Christs great rule: "What you would that men should do to you, do even so to them." In many instances this rule suggested liberation, where the slave was prepared for freedom. In any case, the master is to put himself in his dependents place and to act by him as he would desire himself to be treated if their positions were reversed. Slaves were held to be scarcely human. Deceit and sensuality were regarded as their chief characteristics. They must be ruled, the moralists said, by the fear of punishment. This was the only way to keep them in their place. The Christian master adopts a different policy. He "desists from threatening"; he treats his servants with even-handed justice, with fit courtesy and consideration. The recollection is ever present to his mind, that he must give account of his charge over each one of them to his Lord and theirs. So he will make, as far as in him lies, his own domain an image of the kingdom of Christ.
William Robertson Nicoll, ed., The Expositor's Bible (London: Hodder & Stoughton, 1887–1910) — public domain. 65 of 66 books (1 Corinthians is not separately keyed, as that volume carries no machine-parseable verse references); section-level commentary keyed to the opening verse. Introductory and overview sections not keyed to a specific passage are excluded.
B. W. Johnson 1891 · Public Domain On vv1–3 1–3. Children, obey your parents. The duty of obedience…
1–3. Children, obey your parents. The duty of obedience to parents is older than Christianity; as old as the parental relations. In the Lord. Unless they require of you things forbidden by the Lord. Our duty to Christ is superior, and if parents require us to disobey him, we must still be loyal to him. This passage has been thought to imply that all children of Christians are baptized in infancy into the church, but the children addressed are surely not babes, but old enough to hear and obey the apostolic command, and hence old enough to have heard and obeyed Christ.
B. W. Johnson's The People's New Testament with Notes (1889–1891) — public domain. Electronic text from the Christian Classics Ethereal Library (CCEL) ThML edition.
The Preacher's Complete Homiletical Commentary 1892 · Public Domain On v1 Eph_6:1. Children, obey.—Until the days of discretion arrive this…
CRITICAL AND EXPLANATORY NOTES
Eph_6:1. Children, obey.—Until the days of discretion arrive this is the grace of childhood. If through obedience the child errs, the responsibility of that is with those who commanded. It is only a “surrendered soul” that can sing:
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“I would be treated as a child,
And guided where I go.”
Eph_6:2. Honour thy father and mother.—As long as they are so.
Eph_6:3. That it may be well with thee.—If ever “that it may be” could mean “and so it shall be,” we should strenuously plead for that meaning here. For it would be a pitiable thing indeed to find a man showing filial piety as a profitable course.
Eph_6:4. Nurture and admonition.—The former word is more general than the latter, including everything that goes to the instruction of the child. “Admonition” is reproof, either of word or punishment, or yet again, warning.
MAIN HOMILETICS OF THE PARAGRAPH.—Eph_6:1-4
Duties of Children and Parents.
I. The duty of children to parents is to obey.—
1. This obedience has the divine sanction. “In the Lord” (Eph_6:1). Both the command and the obedience must be in harmony with the relation in which both parents and children stand towards God. The parent who has not himself learnt to respect and obey the law of God is ill prepared for the grave responsibilities of family government. Natural affection and the instincts of common sense will guide the parents in the ordinary affairs of home-life, and the sense of dependence and respect should induce instinctive obedience in the child. No parent has any right to enforce an obedience which is not in harmony with the supreme claims of God. The child who submits to the will of his parents is taught at the same time to obey the higher law of God. If he defies parental authority and persists in disobedience, he is sure to be treated in the same way if he ever has children of his own. To be able to govern we must first learn to obey.
2. This obedience is in harmony with natural order and the eternal principles of justice.—“For this is right” (Eph_6:1). Obedience is the law of the universe, and without it everything would rush into anarchy and chaos. Law is so all-pervasive as to cover every department and relationship of life, and its breach in any sphere carries with it its own punishment. Disobedience is not only a wrong to the person who commits it, but it is an injustice to somebody else. Obedience to parents in things lawful is no hardship. It is becoming and commendable because it is right. It is the perversity of our nature when it becomes difficult to do right. Disobedience is a wilful divergence from the straight line of rectitude, and is the essence of all sin.
3. This obedience ensures the divine blessing (Eph_6:2-3).—It is our duty to obey irrespective of any advantage to be secured. The loyal heart looks, not to the reward, but to the duty. It is no merit to do what it is our duty to do. Yet such is the condescension and goodness of God that He attaches a special blessing to every act of unselfish obedience. Filial obedience should not be dilatory and reluctant, but prompt, cheerful, self-denying, and uniform. Obedience is the path of safety. A pointsman in Prussia was at the junction of two lines of railway, lever in hand, for a train that was signalled. The engine was within a few seconds of reaching the embankment when the man, turning his head, perceived his little boy playing between the rails on which the train was running. He stuck to his lever, but shouted to the child, “Lie down! lie down!” The train passed, and the father rushed forward to pick up what he feared would be the mangled body of his child; but what was his joy to find the boy had at once obeyed his order, had lain down, and the train passed over him without injuring him. His prompt obedience saved his life. Dutiful children secure the blessing of God. Filial obedience practised in the Christian home forms habits of promptitude, self-control, and self respect which are important conditions of success and prosperity.
II. The duty of parents to children is to exercise discipline.—
1. Not by enforcing commands that tend to irritate. “Ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath” (Eph_6:4). Children are a sacred trust and solemn responsibility; not to be weakly fondled or foolishly spoilt, but to be wisely, kindly, and strictly disciplined into obedience and duty. The Chinese have a proverb, when a son is born into a family a bow and arrow are hung before the gate. In Eastern books sons are spoken of as arrows of their fathers. “As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man, so are children of the youth” (Psa_127:4). As the bowman straightens and polishes his arrow, gives it a sharp and solid point, and wings it with feathers, so parents must train and equip their children that they may go straight to the point of duty and hit the mark. The arrows that are not prepared and directed when in the hand may, when they are gone abroad into the world, and all parental training is too late, prove arrows in the heart that will rankle with unspeakable pain. The training of children is also a training of the parent. Many a hint is unconsciously given as to “training up a parent in the way he should go.” While there should be firm discipline, there should not be exasperating and tantalising severity. Rousing a child’s anger is not the best way of subduing it. A sullen submission gained, by provoking and then crushing an angry opposition, is rendered with a sense of injustice and wrong that will breed future mischief. Monod says: “Correction and instruction should proceed from the Lord, and be directed by the Spirit of the Lord in such a way that it is not so much the father who corrects his children and teaches them, as the Lord through him.” The father who chastises in wrath provokes the child to wrath and rebellion.
2. But by judicious religious culture.—“But bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord” (Eph_6:4). Children are the glifts of God to be trained for God. They are susceptible of genuine religious experience, and are often nearer the truth than grown-up people. Christ recognised the spiritual faculty in children, and gave them a conspicuous place in His kingdom. When He wished to show the type of true greatness, He did not point to stars or mountains or earthly dignities, but “called a little child unto Him and, set him in the midst” (Mat_18:2-4). Children are capable of useful religious service, and in many ways may be little missionaries for Christ. Dr. W. L. Breckenridge once said to his mother: “Mother, I think you ruled us with too rigid a rod in our boyhood. It would have been better had you used gentler methods.” The old lady straightened up and said: “Well, William, when you have raised up three as good preachers as I have then you can talk.” The smaller magnets have proportionately much the greater power, and children have a remarkable spiritual force with which the Christian parent has to deal.
Lessons.—
1. Parental discipline should be in harmony with the law of God.
2. The rigour of parental discipline should be tempered with love.
3. Respect and obedience to parents will be divinely rewarded.
GERM NOTES ON THE VERSES
Eph_6:1-4. The Mutual Duties of Children and Parents.
I. Children are to obey and honour their parents.—
1. Children owe to their parents an inward affection and regard. Their obedience should flow from love, gratitude, and esteem. The love parents bear to their children entitles them to reciprocal affection.
2. They are to honour their parents by external tokens of respect.
3. They are to obey the just commands of their parents.
4. They are to receive with decent and humble regard the instructions, counsels, and reproofs of their parents.
5. They should remunerate the favours received from their parents.
6. They are encouraged in their obedience by the divine promise.
II. The duties of parents to children.—
1. To instruct their children in the doctrines and duties of religion.
2. To endeavour by arguments, exhortations, and reproofs to form their lives according to those instructions.
3. To regulate the diversions of their children.
4. To maintain the worship of God in their houses.
5. To let their conversation be exemplary.
6. To train up their children with diligence in some honest business.
7. To commend their children to God and the word of His grace.—Lathrop.
Eph_6:1-2. Obedience.—The dutiful obedience of children is declared by God in the fifth commandment to be the foundation of all social happiness and of every social virtue.
I. The behaviour of a child to its parents is no such trifle as too many perverse children and too many foolish parents are prone to fancy it.—How often we hear mothers saying, “It is only the poor child’s way; it is a little pettish and fractious at times, but it means no harm by it. To be sure it does not mind me quite so well as it ought to do; but children will be children.” So the child goes on uncorrected, and grows up disobedient and undutiful—with habits and dispositions so evil that God has classed them with the very worst crimes, with false swearing, theft, adultery, and even murder. If undutifulness in children had been a mere trifle, would God have put it into this black list?
II. Observe the reasonableness and justice of the duty of children to obey their parents.—The child is helpless and entirely dependent on its parents’ care and kindness. So strong and lasting is a mother’s love that, while other animals drive their young away as soon as they can feed themselves, the love of human parents descends and prolongs itself even to their offspring’s offspring. Think of their fears, their wishes, their prayers for your souls’ welfare. Your love to them should be dutiful love, showing itself in acts of gentleness, respect, and kindness, and in the strictest and readiest obedience. Children are bound to obey, not from constraint, nor from fear of blows, but readily, willingly, cheerfully. The obedience paid for fear of stripes is the obedience of a mule, not of a son. What can a child know save what its parents teach it? Its parents for a time stand in the place of God to it; as such, it must believe them and obey them. You may be the better for their experience, you may profit by their warnings, you may learn from their lessons.
III. Observe the use and benefit of obedience in forming the character of the child.—It is in the school of home, amid the little hardships, restraints, crosses, and disappointments which every child must needs meet with, that the great lesson of obedience is best learnt. There is a root of self-will born in every man, and out of this root grow two evil and misshapen stems—pride and disobedience. You may as well expect water to burn and fire to wet, you may as well expect a barren common that has never been ploughed and sown to produce a crop of wheat, as that a child, which has gone on year after year in pride, self-will, and disobedience to its parents, will readily or easily tear off its habits and its nature, to walk humbly and obediently before God. We must cultivate obedience in the child that it may outgrow, overtop, and stifle, or at least keep under, the evil stem of disobedience. We must cultivate humility in him, that it may keep under the evil of pride. We must train and accustom him to habits of steady self-denial, which our Lord has recommended to us as the best yokes for our headstrong and else unmanageable self-will. Thus the fifth commandment is a kind of practical school where the child, in obeying its parents, learns to obey all to whom it owes obedience.—A. W. Hare.
Eph_6:4. A Father’s Charge.
I. The duties parents owe to their children.—
1. Children are weak and helpless and totally incapable of caring for themselves—hence arises the first duty which parents owe them, that of feeding and clothing them.
2. Are ignorant and without understanding—hence they should not only be fed but taught.
3. Are unruly, and therefore must be governed.
4. Are prone to evil, and therefore must be restrained.
II. The obligations parents are under to practise these duties.—
1. They should do it for their own sakes.
2. For their children’s sake.
3. For society’s sake.
4. For God’s sake.
Learn.—
1. The practicability of a religious education.
2. How awful is the responsibility of parents—of fathers especially.—Sketches.
The Preacher's Complete Homiletical Commentary (gen. ed. Joseph S. Exell; Funk & Wagnalls, c. 1892) — public domain (pre-1929). A full-Bible homiletical/sermon-outline anthology covering 65 of 66 books (2 John is absent from the source module). Text from a community e-Sword module.
William B. Godbey 1900 · Public Domain On v1 1. “Children obey your parents in the Lord: for…
ARGUMENT 24
DOMESTIC GOVERNMENT
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1. “Children obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.” Out of the Lord, dare to disobey and suffer the consequences. If your parents assign you to a dancing-school, refuse to go; if you get a thrashing every day, receive it joyfully for Christ’s sake. It is equally true in the relation of husband and wife, master and slave. You are only to obey in the Lord. When the brutal husband of a holy woman forbade her going to John Wesley’s meetings on pain of death, still she went, though he had sworn in his wrath that be would bake her in his oven. Returning from a glorious class-meeting, she saw the smoke going up from the bake-oven. Falling on her knees, she said; “Lord, if you need a martyr in England, I put in the first bid. I am ready to go into that oven like Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. If you do not need the martyr, put your hand on my wicked husband.” When she got inside of the house, she saw him rolling over the floor, unable to stand on his feet, exclaiming aloud, “Pray for me, O my Polly; I will be in hell before night.” Soon he was converted and sanctified, and became an earnest class leader. When you dare to obey God, he will take care of the results.
2,3. Sin dishonors your father and mother, casting over their memories a reflection of reproach for neglect of duty. A correct life observes the laws of nature, lives hygienically, and always conduces to longevity. “The wicked shall not live out half their days.”
William B. Godbey, Commentary on the New Testament (1896–1900) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
The Sermon Bible 1900 · Public Domain On v1 Eph 6:1-4
Eph 6:1-4
Children and Parents.
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I. St. Paul assumes that the life of children may be a life in Christ. Children are to obey their parents in the Lord, and parents are to nurture their children in the chastening and admonition of the Lord. Every child, apart from its own choice and before it is capable of choice, is environed by the laws of Christ. It is equally true that every child, apart from its choice and before it is capable of choice, is environed by Christ’s protection and grace in this life, and is the heir of eternal blessings in the life to come. Christ died and rose again for the race. Children may obey their parents in the Lord before they are able to understand any Christian doctrine; they may discharge every childish duty, under the inspiration of the Spirit of God, before they have so much as heard whether the Spirit of God has been given; they may live in the light of God before they know that the true light always comes from heaven.
II. Paul had a sensitive sympathy with the wrongs which children sometimes suffer and a strong sense of their claims to consideration. Children are to obey and honour even unreasonable, capricious, and unjust parents; but it is the duty of parents not to be unreasonable, capricious, or unjust. The precept, "Nurture them in the chastening and admonition of the Lord," implies a real and serious faith on the part of the parents that their children belong to Christ and are under Christ’s care. Christian education is not a mission to those who are in revolt against Christ. The children are Christ’s subjects, and have to be trained to loyal obedience to His authority. The education of which the Apostle is thinking is practical rather than speculative; it has reference to life and character rather than to knowledge. By "the chastening of the Lord" the Apostle means that Christian discipline and order of the family which will form the children to the habits of a Christian life. "Chastening" is not chastisement, though chastisement may sometimes be a necessary part of it. The order of a child’s life is determined by its parents, and is to be determined under Christ’s authority, so that the child may be trained to all Christian virtues. The primary condition of a successful Christian education is that the parents should care more for the loyalty of their children to Christ than for anything besides, and the second is that parents should expect their children to be loyal to Christ.
R. W. Dale, Lectures on the Ephesians, p. 378.
References: Eph 6:1-4.—H. W. Beecher, Plymouth Pulpit Sermons, 5th series, p. 167. Eph 6:2.—Clergyman’s Magazine, vol. ii., p. 213; J. H. Wilson, The Gospel and its Fruits, p. 205.
Eph 6:4
I. The Lord brings up His disciples from the beginning of life.
II. The Lord nourishes and cherishes His disciples; He is not a mere Teacher: He is a Trainer. He helps us to learn, and when our courage sinks He revives it.
III. The Lord exhorts, warns, and restrains. There is nurture and there is admonition in the bringing up of Christ’s disciples by their Lord.
IV. The Lord unites with Himself by trust and love those whom He brings up.
V. The Lord’s work of bringing up is without intermission; He is always about it.
VI. Let your instruction and your training have the Lord’s teaching, the Lord’s warnings, the Lord’s doctrines, for their means, and the Lord Himself for their end.
S. Martin, Westminster Chapel Sermons, 1st series, p. 175.
The Christian Training of Children.
Consider:—
I. What is included in, and what is meant by, all our dealings with the young who are growing up among us tending to their discipline: all that we teach them or enjoin on them, or give or deny them. Discipline is by no means synonymous with punishment, though in common conversation we are accustomed often to use it so, but something entirely different. The heart can be disposed to God only by love, which drives out fear, and with fear all the power of punishment. But discipline which aims by steady exercise to control and regulate every emotion and to subdue all the lower instincts of nature under the rule of the higher imparts a salutary knowledge of the power of will, and gives an earnest of liberty and internal order. The larger the place which is given to discipline in our method, the more must punishment lose its effect; because the young mind is already practised, it refuses to have its decisions influenced by considerations either of pleasure or the reverse. It is difficult to keep a clear conscience in this important business. How shall we keep it void of offence? Certainly in no other way than this: we must neither set before ourselves any worldly aim in the training and education of our children, nor teach them to think of anything merely worldly and external as the object to be gained by it; but rather, putting out of view all other results, we must try to have them made distinctly conscious of what powers and capacities they possess which may by-and-by be used in carrying on the work of God on earth, and to have those powers brought under the control of their will by their learning both to overcome indolence and dissipation and to guard against being passionately engrossed in any single object. And this is just what the Apostle means. For instruction and training of all kinds so directed will only serve as discipline to the young, and only by such discipline will they acquire a real possession in the shape of a thorough fitness for every work of God that in the course of their life they may find occasion to do.
II. But however excellent a thing it is to train our children by discipline, what is the highest thing that can be effected by this means? The preparing of the way for the Lord, that He may be able to enter, the adorning of the temple, that He may be able to dwell in it; but towards the actual entering and indwelling of the Lord discipline can contribute nothing. Does not the Lord Himself say that the Spirit moves where He will, and that we cannot so much as know, much less command, where He is to go? Yes, we recognise the truth of that word of Christ in this connection also, and therefore willingly confess our inability. But while acknowledging our helplessness, let us not forget that the same Saviour charged His disciples to go and teach all nations. This then is what we are capable of doing and what we are commanded to do: in our daily intercourse with the young to commend the mighty works of God, that we may stir up in their minds aspirations after a happier condition, and this is what the Apostle calls the admonition of the Lord.
F. Schleiermacher, Selected Sermons, p. 163.
References: Eph 6:4.—J. H. Thorn, Laws of Life after the Mind of Christ, 2nd series, p. 253; J. G. Rogers, Christian World Pulpit, vol. i., p. 65; C. M. Birrell, Ibid., vol. ii., p. 360; W. Braden, Ibid., vol. vi., p. 269; R. F. Horton, Ibid., vol. xxxvi., p. 314. Eph 6:5, Eph 6:6.—J. B. Brown, Ibid., vol. xii., p. 97; Ibid., vol. xvii., p. 406; F. W. Farrar, Ibid., vol. xxxiv., p. 296. Eph 6:5-8.—H. W. Beecher, Ibid., vol. x., p. 4; J. H. Evans, Thursday Penny Pulpit, vol. xi., p. 185. Eph 6:5-9.—E. Blencowe, Plain Sermons to a Country Congregation, vol. ii., p. 427. Eph 6:6.—S. Gladstone, Christian World Pulpit, vol. xxii., p. 280; Clergyman’s Magazine, vol. iii., p. 92. Eph 6:7.—Spurgeon, Sermons, vol. xxv., No. 1484; Clergyman’s Magazine, vol. iv., pp. 85, 88.
Eph 6:7-8
Labour no Hindrance to Spiritual Progress.
I. Servants may be described as servants of Christ. If the Church is regarded, according to the Scriptural imagery, as a kingdom or household, of which Christ is the Head, we may argue that all the members of which it is composed are the servants of Christ; so that, however different their occupation, they all serve the same Master. You could no more spare the Christian usefulness of the humblest individual, than the manual labour of the tiller of the soil, and would as much unhinge the Church by diffusing infidelity among the lower classes, as a kingdom by diffusing rebellion. The eye of the Master is as much on one servant as on another, and His acquaintance with one as actual as with another; so that when we declare of a man that he serves the Lord Christ we mean a great deal more than when we make the like assertion of the various retainers in an earthly household. We do not merely mean that the duties which the man discharges arc duties by whose performance the cause of Christ is advanced or upheld; we mean that the man is as actually employed by Christ and as actually working for Christ as though he had received directions from His lips and gave unto Him an account of his proceedings.
II. Those whose duties in life are of the meanest description may gain as high a recompense as those who move in the first walks of society. Every lawful employment, inasmuch as it is one department of the service of Christ, has a sacred character; and consequently we may be religiously occupied when occupied with our worldly callings, and it is to close our eyes to an ordinance of God to imagine that in working for the body we cannot also be working for the soul. The distinctions of men in their temporal capacity have no corresponding distinctions in their eternal; but however various the situations which Christians occupy, the reward of the inheritance is promised equally to all.
H. Melvill, Penny Pulpit, No. 2263.
References: Eph 6:7, Eph 6:8.—W. Mercer, Christian World Pulpit, vol. x., p. 347. Eph 6:9.—J. H. Evans, Thursday Penny Pulpit, vol. xi., p. 197.
Eph 6:10
Weakness.
I. To the Christian human nature is not a poor, but an infinitely grand, thing; something from which not a little, but everything, may be expected; something which was made in the image of God, was assumed and glorified by God’s own Son, has been the tabernacle of untold heroisms and saintly sufferings, and shall in the end be "renewed in knowledge and majesty after the image of Him who created it." So grand a thing as this can never find safety in weakness. It is a poor toleration which first disparages the dignity, and then tolerates the shortcoming. No, if weakness leads to wrong-doing, it is wrong to be weak; and, in the language of the Gospel, all wrong-doing is sin against God.
II. Weakness can very often be traced to want of foresight. It is weakness to follow a bad example. Yes; but might not the crisis to which the weakness has proved unequal have been prevented by a little foresight? It is weakness, no doubt; but it is weakness which gives abundant warning of its presence. It might have been foreseen, and it might have been guarded against. And, again, there is that weakness which arises from unwillingness to face anything disagreeable.
III. Prayer, if earnest and persisted in, will most surely disclose to us sources of strength of which we should not otherwise have thought; it will show us those practical means of gaining strength which experience proves to be owned and blessed of God. Two of these I will refer to. (1) The first is the precise opposite of that fatal habit of which I spoke. It is the habit of not shrinking from what is disagreeable, the habit of facing a duty with alacrity and without delay. (2) And the second means is that of acquainting yourselves with the lives of God’s greatest and holiest servants.
H. M. Butler, Harrow Sermons, 2nd series, p. 106.
References: Eph 6:10.—H. J. Wilmot-Buxton, The Life of Duty, vol. ii., p. 181; S. James, Church of England Pulpit, vol. xvii., p. 121; J. Vaughan, Fifty Sermons, 8th series, p. 246. Eph 6:10, Eph 6:11.—Clergyman’s Magazine, vol. i., p. 209; Church of England Pulpit, vol. xviii., p. 277. Eph 6:10-12.—J. Ellison, Christian World Pulpit, vol. xv., p. 305. Eph 6:10-13.—H. W. Beecher, Ibid., vol. xxviii., p. 212; Church of England Pulpit, vol. xx., p. 277. Eph 6:11.—"Literary Churchman" Sermons, p. 1. Eph 6:11-18.—H. W. Beecher, Christian World Pulpit, vol. xxiv.,p. 275. Eph 6:12.—Church of England Pulpit, vol. vii., p. 79; Clergyman’s Magazine, vol. i., p. 90; vol. v., p. 31.
Eph 6:12-13
The Unseen Powers.
I. That which lies on the very surface of St. Paul’s language is this commanding truth: that spiritual forces are much greater than material forces. It takes time and trouble for many of us to be really certain of this truth, because from time to time in the world events appear to contradict, or at least to overcloud, it; and yet in the long run the truth asserts itself, ay infallibly. A strong will is a more formidable thing than the most highly developed muscle. They, it has been said, who aspire to rule in permanence, must base their throne, not upon bayonets, but upon convictions and sympathies, upon understandings, and upon hearts. This is true within the sphere of human nature, and St. Paul knew that the Church had to contend with the thought and the reason of paganism much more truly than with its pro-consuls and its legions.
II. Behind all that met the eye in daily life St. Paul discovered another world that did not meet the eye, but which was, for him at least, equally real. Behind all the social tranquillity, all the order, all the enjoyment, of life, all the widening intercourse between races and classes, all the maintenance of law with a fair amount of municipal and personal liberty, which distinguished undoubtedly the imperial regime considered as a whole, behind all that spoke and acted in this vast and most imposing system, behind all its seeming stability and all its progress, St. Paul discerned other forms hovering, guiding, marshalling, arranging, inspiring, that which met the eye. "Do not let us deceive ourselves," he cried, "for we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places."
III. The contest of which St. Paul is speaking is not only to be waged on the great scene of history. St. Paul is speaking of contests humbler, less public, but certainly not less tragical, the contests which are waged sooner or later, with more or less intensity, with the most divergent results, around, within, each human soul. It is within ourselves that we meet now, as the first Christians met, the onset of the principalities and powers; it is in resisting them that we really contribute our little share to the issue of the great battle that rages still as it raged then, which will rage on, between good and evil until the end comes, and the combatants meet with their rewards.
H. P. Liddon, Christian World Pulpit, vol. i., p. 17.
Eph 6:13
The reason expressed in this word "wherefore" is contained in the passage before the text. "We wrestle not against flesh and blood," says St. Paul, "but against spiritual wickedness in high places"—high, subtle, evil spiritual beings, ever ready and, but for God’s great mercy and power shielding us, ever able to deceive us and to lead us astray.
I. It is not enough for a man to be satisfied that he has been brought into that relation to God which the Gospel brings, not enough for him to believe that once for all his sins have been washed away in the blood of the Lamb. There comes this question: Let a man have received this doctrine ever so perfectly and sincerely, let him have no doubt whatever as to the reality of the new relation as a redeemed one in which he stands to his God through Christ, is there a man living that sinneth not? Can he still feel himself undoubtedly in that relation to God which the Gospel means with this sense of yet renewed sin upon him?
II. Our life is not to be a continuous vain seeking after repentance, but it is to be perpetually and always a humble, and penitent, and trustful following of God. We are "to grow in grace." Some men deny the doctrine of growth in grace, and maintain that the change must absolutely be perfect and entire, or it cannot have taken place; but as we improve in holiness we grow in grace and peace: as we struggle honestly, and by degrees more successfully, with our temptations, the faith which enabled us to start on this course, the faith with which we began, increases in our hearts.
III. The Gospel promise does not fail us because our infirmity to a certain extent grows up with our growth even as Christian men. Against all the snares of the devil God has provided a sufficient and sure defence in the promises of His Gospel. We are renewed day by day in the spirit and temper of our mind.
Bishop Claughton, Penny Pulpit, New Series, No. 561.
References: Eph 6:13.—H. W. Beecher, Christian World Pulpit, vol. vii., p. 394; Ibid., vol. x., p. 24; Ibid., vol. xiii., p. 381.
Eph 6:13-14
I. Note the prohibition involved in the precept. It forbids (1) indolent or even weary sleep; (2) cowardly or even politic flight; (3) a treacherous or even a desponding surrender; (4) the declaration of a truce or even an application for it; (5) the giving up of a militant position until the war is fairly over.
II. What do these words demand? (1) They require a distinct and solemn recognition of the fact that the time of our life on earth is a time of war, "an evil day." (2) They require us to be always possessed by the conviction that we are personally called to this good fight. (3) They demand the honest and manly facing of our foes. (4) They require that, having taken the field, we keep it.
S. Martin, Westminster Chapel Sermons, 3rd series, p. 249.
Reference: Eph 6:13-18.—Clergyman’s Magazine, vol. vii., p. 215.
Eph 6:14
Christian Truthfulness.
I. It is obvious that the word "truth" as here used does not mean truth in the object, i.e., the truth of the Gospel, the verities of redemption, but truth in the subject, i.e., that which we so commonly call truthfulness, a quality within the man himself. And this truthfulness, or being true, is predicated of him, not in ordinary things only, but, as he is a Christian, in those things which constitute him a Christian warrior. The girdle of the warrior’s panoply would naturally be a girdle fitted for warfare, of the strength, and material, and pattern of the rest of his armour. And when we come to apply this similitude to practice, it is plain that we must think of this truthfulness, not only as regards words, the outward expression of thoughts, but also as regards acts, which are no less important results of a man’s inward state; and indeed as regards those thoughts themselves from which both speech and action spring.
II. What is it to have the loins girt about with truth? (1) It is to have a man’s own convictions in accordance with the revealed truths of the Gospel which he professes. Without this no Christian soldier can be girt for the battle. (2) All double purposes, all by-ends, all courses of action adopted for effect, are emphatically untrue; our object must not be only truth in detail, but truth in the due and real proportion of the whole. It is characteristic of a diseased conscience in this matter ever to be brooding over minute details, striving to be punctiliously, formally true, without inquiring whether the whole impression given is that which the whole facts really do give. And let us remember the great motive for truth which should be ever before us as Christians. We serve Him who is the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness neither shadow of turning. When our Saviour left us, He bequeathed to us His best gift, the promise of the Father, the Spirit of truth, to dwell in us and possess us, and sanctify us wholly by that word which He Himself spoke of when He said, "Sanctify them through Thy truth; Thy word is truth."
H. Alford, Quebec Chapel Sermons, vol. v., p. 151.
References: Eph 6:14.—A. C. Price, Christian World Pulpit, vol. i., p. 113; Preacher’s Monthly, vol. viii., p. 212; J. H. Evans, Thursday Penny Pulpit, vol. xi., pp. 257, 305. Eph 6:14-17.—E. Garbett, The Soul’s Life, p. 223. Eph 6:15.—H. W. Beecher, Christian World Pulpit, vol. iv., p. 368; Ibid., vol. v., p. 27; G. Brooks, Five Hundred Outlines, p. 4; Preacher’s Monthly, vol. ii., p. 230; J. Vaughan, Sermons, 7th series, p. 136; J. H. Evans, Thursday Penny Pulpit, vol. xi., p. 350. Eph 6:16.—Spurgeon, Sermons, vol. vii., No. 416; Clergyman’s Magazine, vol. i., p. 149; H. W. Beecher, Sermons, 4th series, p. 379. Eph 6:17.—G. Brooks, Five Hundred Outlines, p. 205; J. H. Evans, Thursday Penny Pulpit, vol. xi., pp. 365, 377; Outline Sermons to Children, p. 248.
Eph 6:20
I. The ministers of Christ are more or less ambassadors in bonds; that is to say, they have not merely to contend with difficulties, but the difficulties they contend with are not fair ones. They do not get an equal hearing. But whatever difficulties from without beset the ambassador of Christ, he knows full well that the greatest of his difficulties are within: that his own tongue falters when it should speak plainly; that his own standard of holiness varies even in his thoughts, much more in practice; that long habits of self-indulgence paralyse him when he would exhort others to self-denial; that faults of temper mar his work and lose him the confidence of others; that in these and many other ways he loads himself with difficulty, rivets his own chains. These difficulties, he feels, are unfair ones in the way of his Master’s cause. He is an ambassador in bonds.
II. The work, we know, changes as we advance in life. Like ambassadors, we are sent to different courts, recalled from one, despatched to another. But are we not all without exception, from the first years of sense and intelligence, distinctly and without a metaphor, sent out as ambassadors of Christ in the midst of an adverse world? The difficulties are great; the difficulties are such as may even rouse indignation in us. But there is risk in all noble attempts. The difficulty may be just overcome, the bar be only just surmounted; but that is as good for our purpose as though walls fell down before us, or as if we floated proudly into harbour with a hundred fathoms of blue water underneath the keel. Though in bonds, His ambassadors you are. Speak, then, in your Master’s name; remember that the word of God is not bound.
Archbishop Benson, Boy Life, p. 236.
Reference: W. J. Woods, Christian World Pulpit, vol. xix., p. 402.
Ephesians 6
I. The Apostle compares the struggles of a Christian against the enemies of his soul to the warfare of a soldier against the enemies of his country. What are the spiritual truths, the Christian graces, typified by these outward weapons? (1) The Christian’s girdle is truth. To be sincere and earnest in our purpose, to have the heart engaged in the work, and the will turned honestly to the love of Christ, is the great security for consistent perseverance in the warfare against His enemies.
(2) The breastplate is righteousness; it is the inwrought righteousness of our Saviour. (3) The feet are shod with the preparation of the Gospel of peace. By preparation seems here meant a foundation or firm footing. Resting on the strong support of the Gospel, the Christian soldier will be ready to meet and to resist all efforts for his destruction. (4) The Christian’s life is pervaded and defended by faith. The reason why faith is a complete covering and protection to us is that it carries us out of ourselves, and bids us rest our hopes and affections on the Lord Jesus Christ. It teaches us to find in His life an unerring pattern for our conduct, a direct manifestation of God. (5) As the soldier’s head is guarded by his helmet, so is the Christian’s faith to be completed, his wavering mind stablished, and his faint heart encouraged by salvation. (6) The sword of offensive warfare is compared to the word of God, with which our Lord Himself drove away the assaults of the great adversary.
II. "Praying always." As all human life was a campaign against sin, in which Christ, the Captain of our salvation, led His followers to victory, so the prayers of Christians were the watches of sentries by which the camp of the Lord was guarded and all assaults of the enemy repelled.
G E. L. Cotton, Expository Sermons on the Epistles, vol. ii., p. 332.
The Sermon Bible, ed. William Robertson Nicoll (1888–1900) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
J. R. Dummelow 1909 · Public Domain On v1 Rules for the Family. The Christian's Aemoue
Rules for the Family. The Christian's Aemoue
1-4. Second illustration of orderly subordination: the relation between children and parents.
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1. As before, those who have to obey and submit are taken first. Cp. in the Lord here with 'unto the Lord' (Eph_5:22) and 'unto Christ' (Eph_6:5). Right] both nature and the express Law of God enjoin it.
2. With promise] the first which is accompanied with a promise: cp. 'with the word' (Eph_5:26). We might punctuate, 'the first commandment, with promise that it may be well,' etc.
3. On the other hand, disobedience to parents is very heinous (Rom_1:30; 2Ti_3:2).
4. And] 'Parents also have their obligations: they must (1) not be unreasonable in their demands on their children; (2) give godly discipline.' He says 'fathers,' because mothers would be less likely to be too severe or to control the education.
Nurture] RV chastening' (Heb_12:5, Heb_12:7-8, Heb_12:11): in 2Ti_3:16, 'instruction.' Of the Lord means 'such as God would provide': cp.' of God,' 2Ti_3:11.
5-9. Third illustration: the relation between servants and masters.
5. Servants] All servants then were slaves and St. Paul says 'slaves': 'be obedient to' might be 'obey,' as in Eph_6:1 : 'according to the flesh' = earthly. With fear and trembling] 'very anxious to do well': it does not imply a harsh master (2Co_7:15; Php_2:12).
6. Christianity gives no sanction to rebellion: it elevates and intensifies the duty of obedience. From the heart] These words may be taken with what follows; 'from the soul with good-will doing service.'
7. 'Obedience must be not only thorough, but hearty: temper is all-important.'
8. 'Good conduct, whether of slave or lord, will be fully requited by Him who is Lord of both.'
9. 'Masters, like husbands and parents, have their obligations; they also must have good-temper and goodwill, and be God-fearing.' St. Paul does not tell them to emancipate their slaves; but he tells them to love them as brethren (Phm_1:16). This does not free the slave, but it frees slavery of its evils.
10-20. The final charge is, 'Be strong, and find your strength in the Lord. Be armed with God's armour; for we have to contend, not with earthly foes, but with spiritual powers of great wickedness. Watch and pray ceaselessly for the whole Church and for me, that I may be a courageous missionary, even in prison.'
10. My brethren] an insertion from Php_3:1 : cp. 2Co_13:11; Php_3:1; 2Th_3:1. Be strong] lit. 'be strengthened' (Rom_4:20).
11. Whole armour] 'Nothing must be missing of the full provision which God makes for our safety.' St. Paul omits the spear or pike and the greaves of the Roman soldier, yet mentions being girded and shod, which most men are, but soldiers must be.
12. The malignant powers, by which the wiles or stratagems of the devil are carried out, are specified. The passage is tinged by Jewish ideas about the unseen world. The rulers of the darkness of this world] This fairly represents the Gk., which means powers of darkness, that are rulers of this world, but not rulers of the universe: cp. Eph_1:21; Eph_3:10; Col_1:16; Col_2:15. In the heavenly places (RV)] 'In the spiritual world': but the Jews contemplated the possibility of evil in some of their seven heavens.
13. 'Against these superhuman powers nothing less than the whole armour of God will suffice; but with that the Christian warrior is safe.'
14. The Septuagint of Isa_11:5 and Isa_59:17 is in the Apostle's mind: there it is Jehovah who wears the panoply.
15. The preparation] 'readiness' to preach the good-tidings of peace: cp. Isa_52:7. The Christian warrior fights to bring peace.
16. 'Fire-tipt darts' is a metaphor for fierce temptations coming from the outside. Faith in God is a sure protection against them.
17. Take] 'Receive from God who supplies the panoply, and whose Spirit furnishes the sword, the helmet that is salvation.' He is thinking of Isa_11:4 : cp. Heb_4:12.
18. The thought of the sword furnished by the Spirit, 'who maketh intercession for us' (Rom_8:26), naturally leads on to the thought of prayer: 'receive this sword, with all prayer and supplication praying in every season (1Th_5:17) in the Spirit.' Watching] as a trusty warrior should (Luk_21:36).
19. For me] RV 'on my behalf,' there being a change of preposition in the Gk.: cp. Col_4:2, Col_4:3. Boldly] This probably belongs to what follows, as RV 'that utterance may be given unto me in opening my mouth, to make known with boldness,' etc. 'Pray that all this may be granted to me.'
20. Am an ambassador in bonds] RV 'in chains': mg. 'in a chain.' The singular may refer to the coupling-chain by which he could be attached to the soldier that guarded him. In any case, that an ambassador, whose person was inviolate, should be chained, was a paradox.
21, 22. The Mission of Tychicus: almost verbatim as Col_4:7-8, Tychicus is the bearer of both letters, and of that to Philemon: cp. Act_20:4; 2Ti_4:12; Tit_3:12, By long service he well earned the title of 'faithful minister.'
23, 24. Concluding Benediction.
Note the omission of all personal salutations and similar details, of which we have eight vv. in the Epistle to the Colossians. This is a circular letter to several Churches, and hence no individuals are mentioned. Note also the change to the third person, 'to the brethren.. all them that love our Lord.' In Colossians, as elsewhere, he says 'you.' In two other points this benediction differs from that in other letters. It is twofold, not single; Peace be to, Grace be with; and 'Peace' is placed before, not after 'Grace.' Contrast Rom_1:7; 1Co_1:8; 2Co_1:2; Gal_1:3; Col_1:2, etc. An imitator would have copied other Epistles.
24. Sincerity] It is doubtful whether the Gk. can mean this; better, 'incorruption' (1Co_15:42, 1Co_15:50, 1Co_15:53-54) or 'iacorruptibility.' It is those who love with an imperishable love that are meant: there must be neither decrease nor decay. 'Those who were “chosen in Him before the foundation of the world” (Eph_1:4) retain their love for Him undiminished after the world itself has passed away.' A worthy conclusion to this immortal Epistle!
J. R. Dummelow, A Commentary on the Holy Bible (Macmillan, 1909) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Paul E. Kretzmann 1924 · Public Domain On v1 The Duties of Children, of Parents, of Servants.
The Duties of Children, of Parents, of Servants.
A word to children and parents:
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v. 1. Children, obey your parents in the Lord; for this is right.
v. 2. Honor thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise,
v. 3. that it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.
v. 4. And ye father s, provoke not your children to wrath, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
The relation between husband and wife naturally suggests that between parents and children. St. Paul addresses himself to the children first: Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. The apostle does not make it a matter of choice or of disposition, but of duty: it is the right thing, it is in accordance with the Law of God, with His order from the beginning, that children yield obedience to their parents. It is also not a matter following upon a mutual agreement, but it is a state into which the children are born; by the fact of their birth God places them into subjection to their parents. The duty of obedience on the part of children is one from which God Himself does not dispense, except in cases where His will is higher, Act 5:29. Neither can the state dispense from this duty, nor, in fact, the parents themselves, for they are God’s representatives and will commit a grievous sin if they do not maintain the honor of their position. Christian children will therefore be obedient to their parents, not merely on the basis of natural right, but in the Lord, to give evidence of their relation to God in this manner. In support of his position Paul quotes the Fourth Commandment: Honor thy father and mother, Exo 20:12; Deu 5:16. The honor due to parents includes two points: that the children recognize and acknowledge their parents as their superiors, as the representatives of God, and that they, by this token, gladly submit themselves to the will of the parents. The apostle adds, further to stress the importance of the commandment: Which is the first commandment with promise, That well it may be to thee and thou mayest be long-living on the earth. Because the Fourth Commandment is a precept of the first degree, because it belongs to the principal and most important commandments, and because a special promise is attached to it, therefore it demands unequivocal consideration and unhesitating obedience. Note that the apostle omits that part of the promise which was intended specifically for the Jewish people, thus making the commandment read for all nations. If children desire to have the good will of God resting upon them, which shows itself in granting welfare and long life according to His gracious will, then they should live a life of obedience to their parents. Note: This promise is the promise of the heavenly Father and is fulfilled even in cases where good fortune and length of life are not given according to the standard of this world. Mark also that the commandment is emphatically addressed to every individual child, with the word "honor" occupying the position of greatest stress.
The precept to the parents is brief, but comprehensive: And you fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the discipline and admonition of the Lord. Although the parental duty is set forth in terms of the father’s obligation, yet the mother’s rule and responsibility, being included in that of the husband, is just as strongly enjoined. Parents will, first of all, avoid all things which are apt to embitter, irritate, and exasperate their children, injustice, unreasonable severity, a senseless goading and teasing, and the like, all of which is likely to make the children indisposed to render the honor and obedience which is their duty. To some extent, at least, the blame will be on the side of the parents in that case; even Christian parents offend more often on the side of the Law than on that of the Gospel. Parents should nurture their children, take care of their entire physical, mental, moral, and religious training; their discipline in such education, their admonition by reproof, remonstrance, and blame should be that of Christ, such training as proceeds from Him and is prescribed by Him. The Lord’s entire manner of educating is one calculated to win people for Himself, so that they willingly follow His leadership, and His example should always stand before the eyes of all parents as an ideal after which they may strive. A whole volume of sound pedagogy is contained in this one verse.
Paul E. Kretzmann, Popular Commentary of the Bible (1921–1924) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
unfoldingWord translationNotes 2017 · CC BY-SA 4.0 On v1 Connecting Statement:
Connecting Statement:
Paul continues to explain how Christians are to submit themselves to each other. He gives instructions to children, fathers, workers, and masters.
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General Information:
The first word "your" is plural. Then Paul quotes Moses. Moses was talking to the people of Israel as though they were one person, so "your" and "you" are singular. You may need to translate them as plurals. (See: Forms of You)
Children, obey your parents in the Lord
Paul reminds children to obey their physical parents.
translationWords
obey
lord
honor
ancestor
command
promise
unfoldingWord translationNotes — © Distant Shores Media and the Door43 World Missions Community, licensed CC BY-SA 4.0. Source: git.door43.org/Door43/en_tn.
Tyndale Open Study Notes 2022 · CC BY-SA 4.0 On vv1–2 6:1-4 The relationship between parents and children is to…
6:1-4 The relationship between parents and children is to be a reflection of their devotion to the Lord. Christian children are to obey their parents, and Christian parents are to discipline their children gently (see Col 3:20-21).
Tyndale Open Study Notes — © Tyndale Open Resources, licensed CC BY-SA 4.0. Text via the HelloAO Bible API.