Discipline your son, for there is hope; don’t be a willing party to his death.
Parallel Translations
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Discipline your son, for there is hope; don’t be a willing party to his death.
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Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying.
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Chasten thy son, for there is hope; but set not thy heart on his destruction.
Cross-references (6)
Passages linked to Proverbs 19:18 in the Treasury of Scripture Knowledge, ordered by reader-vote popularity; verse text shown in World English Bible.
- Proverbs 13:24 One who spares the rod hates his son, but one who loves him is careful to discipline him.
- Proverbs 29:15 The rod of correction gives wisdom, but a child left to himself causes shame to his mother.
- Proverbs 22:15 Folly is bound up in the heart of a child: the rod of discipline drives it far from him.
- Proverbs 23:13-14 Don’t withhold correction from a child. If you punish him with the rod, he will not die. Punish him with the rod, and save his soul from Sheol.
- Hebrews 12:7-10 It is for discipline that you endure. God deals with you as with children, for what son is there whom his father doesn’t discipline? But if you are without discipline, of which all have been made partakers, then you are illegitimate, and not children. Furthermore, we had the fathers of our flesh to chasten us, and we paid them respect. Shall we not much rather be in subjection to the Father of spirits, and live? For they indeed, for a few days, punished us as seemed good to them; but he for our profit, that we may be partakers of his holiness.
- Proverbs 29:17 Correct your son, and he will give you peace; yes, he will bring delight to your soul.
Cross-references from openbible.info (CC BY 4.0)
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John Trapp 1656 · Public Domain Pro 19:18 Chasten thy son while there is hope,…
Pro 19:18 Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying.
Ver. 18. Chasten thy son while there is hope.] {See Trapp on "Pro 13:24"}
John Trapp, A Commentary or Exposition upon All the Books of the Old and New Testament (1647–1656) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Matthew Poole 1685 · Public Domain While there is hope; before custom in sin, and…
While there is hope; before custom in sin, and thy indulgence, hath made him hard-hearted and incorrigible.
Let not thy soul spare, forbear not to give him due and necessary correction,
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for his crying, which oft stirs up a foolish and pernicious pity in parents towards them. This word, with some small difference in the points, is used in this sense Isa 24:11. Or, as it is in the margin, to his destruction, intimating that this is a cruel pity, and a likely way to expose him to that death threatened to stubborn sons, Deu 21:18,21. But this clause is, and may be, rendered otherwise, yet or but do not lift up thy soul (which signifies a vehement desire, Deu 24:15; Psa 25:1; Jer 44:14; let not thy passion or eager desire of chastening him transport thee so far as) to cause him to die, i.e. use moderation in this work.
Matthew Poole's English Annotations on the Holy Bible (1683–1685) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword/MySword module.
Matthew Henry 1710 · Public Domain Parents are here cautioned against a foolish indulgence of…
Parents are here cautioned against a foolish indulgence of their children that are untoward and viciously inclined, and that discover such an ill temper of mind as is not likely to be cured but by severity. 1. Do not say that it is all in good time to correct them; no, as soon as ever there appears a corrupt disposition in them check it immediately, before it gets head, and takes root, and is hardened into a habit: Chasten thy son while there is hope, for perhaps, if he be let alone awhile, he will be past hope, and a much greater chastening will not do that which now a less would effect. It is easiest plucking up weeds as soon as they spring up, and the bullock that is designed for the yoke should be betimes accustomed to it. 2. Do not say that it is a pity to correct them, and that, because they cry and beg to be forgiven, you cannot find in your heart to do it. If the point can be gained without correction, well and good; but if you find, as it often proves, that your forgiving them once, upon a dissembled repentance and promise of amendment, does but embolden them to offend again, especially if it be a thing that is in itself sinful (as lying, swearing, ribaldry, stealing, or the like), in such a case put on resolution, and let not thy soul spare for his crying. It is better that he should cry under thy rod than under the sword of the magistrate, or, which is more fearful, that of divine vengeance.
Matthew Henry's Commentary on the Whole Bible (1708–1710) — public domain (CC PDM 1.0). Text via the HelloAO Bible API.
John Gill 1763 · Public Domain Chasten thy son while there is hope,.... Of guiding…
Chasten thy son while there is hope,.... Of guiding and keeping him in the right way, as long as corrections are or can be hoped to be of use; while in a state of infancy, childhood, and youth; while under parental government; and before habits in sin are grown strong, and the case become desperate, and he is hardened, and proof against all instruction and discipline;
and let not thy soul spare for his crying; the noise he makes, the tears he sheds, the entreaties he uses to keep off the rod; let not a foolish pity and tenderness prevail to lay it aside on that account the consequence of which may be bad to parent and child; see Pro 13:24. The Targum is,
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"but unto his death do not lift up thy soul;''
or to the slaying of him (t), as the Vulgate Latin version; and this sense Jarchi gives into: and then the meaning is, that though parents should be careful to give due correction to their children, so long as there is hope of doing them good, yet not in a brutal and barbarous manner, to the endangering of their lives: as some parents are too indolent, mild, and gentle, as Eli was; others are too wrathful and furious and use no moderation in their corrections, but unmercifully beat their children; such extremes ought to be avoided. Gersom interprets the word of crying, as we do.
(t) "ad interficiendum cum", Pagninus, Vatablus, Mercerus, Gejerus; "ad occidendum sum", Piscator, Cocceius, Tigurine version, Michaelis, Schultens, Gussetius, p. 534.
John Gill's Exposition of the Whole Bible (1746–1763) — public domain (CC PDM 1.0). Text via the HelloAO Bible API.
John Wesley 1765 · Public Domain While - Before custom in sin, and thy indulgence…
While - Before custom in sin, and thy indulgence have made him incorrigible. Let not - Forbear not to give him due and necessary correction.
John Wesley, Explanatory Notes Upon the Whole Bible (1754–1765) — public domain. Text via the GEBible commentary corpus.
Adam Clarke 1810 · Public Domain Verse 18. Let not thy soul spare for his…
Verse 18. Let not thy soul spare for his crying.] This is a hard precept for a parent. Nothing affects the heart of a parent so much as a child's cries and tears. But it is better that the child may be caused to cry, when the correction may be healthful to his soul, than that the parent should cry afterwards, when the child is grown to man's estate, and his evil habits are sealed for life.
Adam Clarke's Commentary on the Bible (1810–1826) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword/MySword module.
Joseph Benson 1811 · Public Domain Pro 19:18. Chasten thy son while there is hope…
Pro 19:18. Chasten thy son while there is hope — Before custom in sin, and thy indulgence have made him hard-hearted and incorrigible; and let not thy soul spare for his crying — Forbear not to give him due and necessary correction, through a foolish and destructive pity, excited by his tears and cries; for it is better he should cry under thy rod, than under the sword of the magistrate, or, which is more to be feared, that of divine vengeance.
Joseph Benson's Commentary on the Old and New Testaments (1811–1818) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Albert Barnes 1834 · Public Domain While there is hope - While he is still…
While there is hope - While he is still young, and capable of being reformed.
Crying - Better, as in the margin, Do not set thy soul on his destruction; words which either counsel forbearance in the act of chastisement (compare Eph 6:4; Col 3:21); or urge that a false clemency is a real cruelty. The latter sense is preferable. The father is warned that to forbear from chastising is virtually to expose the son who needs it to a far worse penalty.
Albert Barnes' Notes on the Bible (1834–1885) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword/MySword module.
Charles Bridges 1846 · Public Domain Christian parents! carefully study the word of God. See…
Christian parents! carefully study the word of God. See here our Father’s wise and loving discipline with his children. "Like as a Father, he pitieth his children." "As one whom his mother comforteth, so will I comfort you."†1 Yet when his children need chastening; though the flesh cries — Spare; though every groan enters into his heart,†2 he loves so well, that his soul spares them not for their crying.†3 He uses the rod; yea, if need be, heavily.†4 He will wither their brightest comforts, children, or property, if they turn them to idols; and this, "not for his pleasure, but for their profit."†5 And what child has not blessed him, that he did not refrain his discipline, till it had done "its perfect work"?
Is not this then our pattern and our standard; setting out the sound principle of a Christian education? "Fathers, provoke not your children to wrath; lest they be discouraged." (Col 3:21 .) But let not the rule — chasten — spare not — be "a hard saying." Is not tenderness for the child a cover for the indulgence of weak and foolish affections? There is much more mercy in what seems to be harshness, than in false tenderness. (Pro 23:13-14 .) Let the child see, that we are resolved; that we are not to be diverted from our duty by the cry of weakness or passion. Far better that the child should cry under healthful correction, than that parents should afterwards cry under the bitter fruit to themselves and children, of neglected discipline. ’Eli could not have devised which way to have plagued himself and his house so much, as by his kindness to his children’s sin. Parents need no other means to make themselves miserable than sparing the rod.’†6 Yet much less of it would be needed, did they govern, as they ought to do, by the steady decision of a word, a frown, or a look.
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But the great force of the rule is its timely application — while there is hope. For hopeless the case may be, if the remedy be delayed. The cure of the evil must be commenced in infancy. Not a moment is to be lost. "Betimes" (Pro 13:24 ; Pro 22:15 ) — is the season, when the good can be effected with the most ease, and the fewest strokes. The lesson of obedience should be learnt at the first dawn. One decided struggle and victory in very early life, may, under God, do much towards settling the point at once and to the end. On the other hand, sharp chastening may fail later to accomplish, what a slight rebuke in the early course might have wrought.
But is there not too often a voluntary blindness, that does not choose to see what it is painful to correct? The false notion — ’Children will be children’ — leads us often to pass over real faults, and consider their tempers and waywardness as too trifling to require prompt correction. And thus sin, winked at in its beginnings, hardens in all the strength of deep-rooted corruptions. Whereas — who would neglect their most trifling bodily ailment, which might grow into serious results? If they cannot be argued with, they must be controlled. How often have we found in after-life the evil of fixed habits, which early correction might have subdued with far less cost of suffering! (1Ki 1:6 ; 1Ki 2:24 .) Oh! what grace and wisdom is needed to discipline our minds, judgment, and affections to that tone of self-government, which will enable us to train our children practically for the service of God, and for their own happiness!
Footnotes:
†1 Psa 103:13. Isa 66:13 .
†2 Exo 2:23-24. Jdg 10:16 .
†3 Psa 89:30-32.
†4 Psa 39:10. 1Pe 5:6 .
†5 Heb 12:10. Compare Lam 3:33 .
†6 Bishop Hall’s Contemplations, Book xi. xii.
Charles Bridges, An Exposition of the Book of Proverbs (1846) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Haydock's Catholic Bible Commentary 1859 · Public Domain Killing. Protestants, "crying;" or by his complaint be not…
Killing. Protestants, "crying;" or by his complaint be not deterred. (Haydock) --- Chaldean agrees with us. The law permitted parents to sell their children, and to have them stoned to death, if they declared them disobedient, (Deuteronomy xxi. 18.; Calmet) and riotous, ver. 20. Timely chastisement may prevent such extremities. (Haydock) --- St. Paul dissuades unnecessary severity, Colossians iii. 21.
George Leo Haydock (1774–1849), Haydock's Catholic Family Bible and Commentary, 1859 edition — public domain. Excludes Psalms (Douay-Rheims chapter numbering differs from Protestant) and Deuterocanonical books (Catholic canon only).
Robert Jamieson, A. R. Fausset & David Brown 1871 · Public Domain (Compare Pro 13:24; Pro 23:13).
(Compare Pro 13:24; Pro 23:13).
let not . . . spare--literally, "do not lift up thy soul" (Psa 24:4; Psa 25:1), that is, do not desire to his death; a caution to passionate parents against angry chastisement.
Jamieson, Fausset & Brown — Commentary Critical and Explanatory on the Whole Bible (1871) — public domain (CC PDM 1.0). Text via the HelloAO Bible API.
Daniel D. Whedon 1874 · Public Domain 18. Chasten… while there is hope — Correct for…
18. Chasten… while there is hope — Correct for the purpose and with the expectation of improvement; of course, therefore, neither vindictively nor cruelly.
Let not thy soul spare for his crying — Or, as many good critics read. “Lift not up thy soul to slay him;” let not thy desire or passion extend so far as to slay him; a very necessary caution to a passionate father, especially where, as in the East, he had the power of life and death over his children. Rueetschi, however, maintains that it is not a caution against undue severity, but against the cruel kindness that kills by witholding seasonable correction. He suggests as parallels Pro_3:12; Pro_13:24; Pro_22:15. More in point is Pro_23:13. The Speaker’s Commentary favours this view; but many respectable commentators take the other, and regard Eph_6:4, and Col_3:21, as supporting it.
Daniel D. Whedon (gen. ed.), Commentary on the Old and New Testaments (1874–1909) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
The Cambridge Bible for Schools and Colleges 1878 · Public Domain 18. while] R.V. seeing: i.e. for if done now…
18. while] R.V. seeing: i.e. for if done now it will not be too late.
let not thy soul spare for his crying] Rather, set not thy heart on his destruction, R.V.; lit. on causing him to die. This might mean, let not thy passionate and excessive correction kill or injure him; as LXX., Vulg. and Maurer (sed cave occidas inter castigandum), and Coverdale, “but let not thy soul be moved to slay him”; but it is better to understand it of the result of withholding correction: be not bent by thy foolish indulgence on ruining him. So A.V. marg., “Let not thy soul spare to his destruction, or to cause him to die.” Comp. 1Ki_2:6; and Sir_30:1.
The Cambridge Bible for Schools and Colleges (gen. ed. J. J. S. Perowne; Cambridge University Press, 1878–1918) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Ellicott's Commentary for English Readers 1878 · Public Domain (18) And let not thy soul spare for his…
(18) And let not thy soul spare for his crying.—Or, but set not thy soul on his destruction. Do not go so far as to kill him in thy zeal for his good, or despair of his amendment. (Comp. Eph_6:4; Col_3:21.) It may also signify “do not let him perish for want of chastisement,” as Pro_23:13 is also explained.
A Bible Commentary for English Readers, edited by Charles John Ellicott (1878–1897) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
The Pulpit Commentary 1880 · Public Domain Chasten thy son while there is hope; or. seeing…
Chasten thy son while there is hope; or. seeing that there is hope. Being still young and impressionable, and not confirmed in bad habits, he may be reformed by judicious chastisement. The same expression occurs in Job_11:18 Jer_31:16. "For so he shall be well hoped of" (euelpiv ), Septuagint. (comp. Pro_23:13) And let not thy soul spare for his crying. "It is better," says a German apothegm, "that the child weep than the father." But the rendering of the Authorized Version is not well established, and this second clause is intended to inculcate moderation in punishment. Vulgate, Ad interfectionem autem ejus ne ponas animam tuam; Revised Version. Set not thine heart on his destruction. Chastise him duty and sufficiently, but not so heavily as to occasion his death, which a father had no right to do. The Law enjoined the parents who had an incorrigibly bad son to bring him before the judge or the eiders, who alone had the power of life and death, and might in certain cases order the offender to be stoned. (Deu_21:18, etc.) Christianity recommended moderation in punishment. (see Eph_6:4 Col_3:21) Septuagint, "Be not excited in the mind to despiteful treatment (eiv ubrin );" i.e. be not led away by passion to unseemly acts or words, but reprove with gentleness, while you are firm and uncompromising in denouncing evil. This is much the same advice as that given by the apostle in the passages just cited.
Timely chastisement.
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I CHASTISEMENT SHOULD BE TIMELY. "Prevention is better than cure." It we wait till the weeds run to seed it is in vain for us to pull them up they will have sown another and larger crop. The lion"s cub may be caught and caged; the full-grown beast is dangerous to approach, and out of our power. Consider some practical applications of these truths.
1. They show us the importance of early home training. The first seeds are sown at home. If an evil disposition reveals itself there, it should be checked before it develops into a fatal habit. Foolishly fond parents laugh at exhibitions of bad temper and other faults in very young children, amused at the quaintness and pitying the helplessness of these miniature sins. But surely a wiser course would be to nip the evil in the bud.
2. They enhance the value of Sunday school work. Five million children were under Sunday school teaching in England during the year 1888. The great mass of the population passes through this instruction. Surely more should be made of the golden opportunity thus afforded of giving a right course to the lives of the people. Most working men will not go to church. But they will permit their children to attend Sunday school. We have the working classes with us in their childhood.
3. They point to an enlargement of the agency of industrial schools. Already juvenile crime has been reduced by one-half this is one of the most cheering signs of the times. But still there are multitudes of children who breathe an atmosphere of crime from their cradles. There is no more Christian work than the effort to save these victims of the vices of their parents. The juvenile offender should be an object of peculiar solicitude to one who has the well being of society at heart.
II CHASTISEMENT SHOULD BE HOPEFUL. There is hope for all in their youth. We may not be able to recover the degraded, besotted wrecks of humanity in their more advanced years. But the children are amenable to saving influences, and the treatment of them should be inspired with a belief that they may be trained. Directly any parent or teacher despairs of a child he proves himself no longer competent to have the charge of him. Reading the second clause of the verse in the language of the Revisers, we are warned against vindictive chastisement: "And set not thy heart on his destruction." The old notion of punishment was purely retributive; the newer notion of it is more disciplinary. We want fewer prisons and more reformatories. But for encouragement in such efforts we must have grounds of hope. Observe some of these.
1. The elasticity of youth. The young are capable of great changes and of large development.
2. The Divine direction. The providence of God overruling our attempts at correction is needed to bring them to a successful issue. But we have a right to look for this end, for God desires the salvation and recovery of his children.
3. The power of love. We can never correct to good purpose unless we do so from motives of love. When these motives are felt they cannot but make themselves effective in the end. Thou, though the chastisement may have been resented at first, the good purpose that instigated it will be ultimately recognized, and may rouse the better nature of the wrong doer,
Vers. 18-21. The true prudence.
I IN THE PARENTAL RELATION. (Ver. 18)
1. The necessity of discipline. The exuberance of youth needs the hand of the pruner; the wildness of the colt must be early tamed, or never. Weak indulgence is the worst unkindness to children.
2. The unwisdom of excessive severity. Cruelty is not discipline; too great sharpness is as bed as the other extreme. Children are thus made base, induced to take up with bad company, and to surfeit and run to excess when they become their own masters.
II IS THE RELATION OF SELF-GOVERNMENT.
1. The folly and injuriousness of passion. (Ver. 19) Not only in the harmful deeds and words it may produce towards others, but in the havoc it produces in one"s own bosom. How fine the saying of Plato to his slave, "I would beat thee, but that I am angry"! "Learn of him who is meek and lowly of heart.
2. The wisdom of a teachable spirit. (Ver. 20) Never to be above listening to proffered advice from others, and to find in every humiliation and every failure an admonition from the Father of spirits, this is life wisdom. And thus a store is being laid up against the time to come, that we may lay hold on eternal life.
III PRUDENCE BUT A FINITE WISDOM. (Ver. 21) God is our best Counsellor; without him our prudence avails not, and along with all prudence there must be the recognition of his overruling, all-controlling wisdom. To begin with God is the true secret of success in every enterprise. May he prevent, or go before, us in all our doings! J.
Vers. 22-29. Mixed maxims of life-wisdom.
I HUMAN KINDNESS. (Ver. 22) There is no purer delight than in the feelings of love and the practical exercise of universal kindness. If the mere pleasure of the selfish and the benevolent life be the criterion, without question the latter has the advantage.
II TRUTHFULNESS. (Vers. 22, 28) So the honest poor outweighs the rich or successful liar in intrinsic happiness as well as in repute. The worthless witness is pest to society, an abomination to God.
III PIETY. (Ver. 23) It is a living principle in every sense of the word hath the promise of life in both worlds. It provides for the soul satisfaction, rest, the consciousness of present and eternal security.
IV IDLENESS. (Ver. 24) Exposed by a vivid picture of the idle man"s attitude. It reminds one of the saying concerning a certain distinguished writer"s idleness, that were he walking through an orchard where the fruit brushed against his mouth, he would be too idle to open it to bite a morsel. No moral good can be ours without seeking.
V SCOFFING FOLLY CONTRASTED WITH SIMPLICITY AND SENSE. (Vers. 25, 29) He that places himself above instruction ends by bringing himself beneath contempt. Scorn for good has, like every sin, its own determined punishment. And "God strikes some that he may warn all.
VI FILIAL IMPIETY. (Vers. 26, 27) The shame and sorrow that it brings to parents is constantly insisted on as a lesson and a warning to the latter. If these bitter experiences are to be avoided, let children be timely trained to obedience, respect, and reverence for God. God"s Word is the true rule and guide of life, and he who departs from it is a corrupt and seductive teacher. J.
See homily on Pro_13:24. C.
The Pulpit Commentary (1880–1919), ed. H.D.M. Spence-Jones & Joseph S. Exell — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
The Preacher's Complete Homiletical Commentary 1892 · Public Domain Pro_19:13. Calamity. The word so translated is in the…
CRITICAL NOTES.—
Pro_19:13. Calamity. The word so translated is in the plural form, so as to express the continuance of the trouble.
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MAIN HOMILETICS OF Pro_19:13-14; Pro_19:18
DOMESTIC SORROW AND HOW TO AVOID IT
I. Two fruitful sources of sorrow. There are many fountains whence flow waters which sadly embitter the lives of men, but there is none outside of personal character which can more entirely darken their days than either of those mentioned in the thirteenth verse. To be either the father of a foolish son or the husband of a contentious wife is sorrow indeed. The first clause of this proverb is nearly the same as that in chap. Pro_10:1, for Homiletics on which see page 137. The contentious wife is here compared to a “continual dropping,” because although the discomfort would not be great if it was only occasional, its perpetual existence makes life wretched. A drop of water falling upon a man’s head is a very trifling matter, but one of the most dreaded tortures of the Spanish inquisition was that in which a man was placed in such a position that a single drop was constantly descending upon his head. Hour after hour, day after day, and night after night, the drops followed one another in regular and unbroken succession until the poor wretch first lost reason and then life. It is much harder to bear a burden which is never lifted from the shoulders than to carry one which is much heavier for a short time and for a very limited distance. So it is easier for a man to rise above trials which, although they may be almost overwhelming for a time, last but through a comparatively very short portion of his life. But the trial of a contentious wife is unceasing so long as the marriage bond continues, and it is this that makes it so greatly to be dreaded.
II. Means suggested whereby these sources of sorrow may be avoided. If so much depends upon our family relationships—if the character of wife and child have so much to do with our weal and woe—it becomes a most momentous question how to act so as to secure a prudent wife in the first place, and then to avoid the calamity of a foolish son. It must be remembered that the first is purely a matter of choice. A man’s “house and riches” may be “the inheritance of fathers,” his social position may depend upon his parents, but his wife depends upon his own choice, and as “a prudent wife is from the Lord,” if he seeks the guidance of Him who is alone the infallible reader of character, instead of following the leadings of his fancy or consulting his worldly interests, he may with confidence expect to avoid the curse and secure the blessing. The other relationship is not one of choice. Our children are sent to us by the hand of God, and we have no more voice in determining their dispositions and mental constitutions than we have the colour of their hair, or any other bodily characteristic. But of two things we are certain.
1. That they will need a training which will not be always pleasant to them. Where there is disease in the body a cure cannot often be effected without a resort to unpleasant—often to painful—measures. It is not pleasant to a surgeon to use the knife, but it is often indispensable to his patient’s recovery to health. And both experience and revelation testify to the fact that our children come into the world with a moral taint upon them—that they have a tendency to go the wrong way—that, in the words of the Psalmist (Psa_51:5) they are “shapen in iniquity and conceived in sin.” If a parent desires to avoid the calamity of a foolish son he must early recognise the truth that his child will not become morally wise unless he “chasten” him, unless he subject him to a system of moral training, unless he make him feel that punishment must follow sin. This will be as painful sometimes to the parent as to the child; the crying of the son will hurt the father more than the rod will hurt the child, but the end to be attained by present suffering must be borne in mind, and must nerve the heart and hand of him whose duty it is to administer chastisement. (On this subject see also Homiletics on chap. Pro_13:24, page 334).
2. That there is reason to hope that children, if rightly trained, will be a joy and not a sorrow. There is hope. When a river has but just left its source among the hills, and the current is feeble, its progress can be stopped with ease; but when it has flowed on for a few miles and there is depth of water enough to float a fleet, it is almost impossible to stop its onward course. So, when the power of evil in the human soul is in its infancy, it is a much more easy task to restrain it than when it has acquired strength by years of uncontrolled dominion. When the young oak is but a few inches above the ground, the hand of the woodman can bend the slender stem as he pleases; but when it has grown for half a century he is powerless to turn it from the direction which it has taken. So a child’s will is pliable to the wise training of the parent, and if the education of the moral nature be begun early, there is every reason to hope that it will acquire strength to overcome both sin within and without, and that a righteous manhood will in the future more than repay both him whose duty it is to chasten, and him upon whom the chastisement must fall.
OUTLINES AND SUGGESTIVE COMMENTS
Pro_19:13-14. “A prudent wife” is not to be got by an imprudent mode of choice. The gift must be sought “from the Lord.” But this does not mean that the Lord is supernaturally to point out the individual. Our own discretion must be put in exercise, along with prayer for the divine superintendence and direction, so as to bring about a happy result. And then the precious gift should be owned, and the all-bountiful Giver praised for his goodness in bestowing it.—Wardlaw.
“Every good gift is from the Lord” (Jas_1:17) only, some in the ordinary course, others more directly from Him. Houses and riches, though His gifts, come by descent. They are the inheritance of fathers. The heir is known, and in the course of events he takes possession of his estate. But the prudent wife is wholly unconnected with the man. There has been no previous bond of relation. She is often brought from a distance. “The Lord brought her to the man” by His special Providence, and therefore as His special gift.—Bridges.
Pro_19:18. The great force of the rule is its timely application—while there is hope. For hopeless the case may be, if the remedy be delayed. The cure of the evil must be commenced in infancy. Not a moment is to be lost. “Betimes” (chap. Pro_13:24; Pro_22:15)—is the season when the good can be effected with the most ease, and the fewest strokes. The lesson of obedience should be learnt at the first dawn. One decided struggle and victory in very early life, may, under God, do much towards settling the point at once and to the end. On the other hand, sharp chastening may fail later to accomplish, what a slight rebuke in the early course might have wrought.—Bridges.
You are here taught further, that firmness must be in union with affection in applying the rod. The words seem to express a harsh, yet it is an important and most salutary lesson:—“let not thy soul spare for his crying.” The words do not mean, that you should not feel, very far from that. It was the knowledge that feeling was unavoidable, and that the strength and tenderness of it was ever apt to tempt parents to relent and desist, and leave their end unaccomplished,—that made it necessary to warn against too ready a yielding to this natural inclination. The child may cry, and cry bitterly, previously to the correction; but, when you have reason to think the crying is for the rod rather than for the fault, and that, but for the threatened chastisement, the heart would probably have been unmoved, and the eyes dry;—then you must not allow yourselves to be so unmanned by his tears, as to suspend your purpose, and decline its infliction. If a child perceives this (and soon are children sharp enough to find it out) he has discovered the way to move you next time; and will have recourse to it accordingly.—Wardlaw.
On the subject of Pro_19:15 see Homiletics on chap. Pro_6:9-10, page 79.
CRITICAL NOTES.—
Pro_19:18. Let not thy soul spare for his crying. The translations of most expositors here differ widely from the authorised version. Grotius, Maurer, Delitzsch, Zöckler, etc., read, “Let not thy soul rise to kill him,” “Go not too far to kill him,” etc., all understanding the precept to be directed against excessive severity. Cartwright renders it “Let not thy soul spare him, to his destruction.”
Pro_19:20. Latter end, rather afterwards.
MAIN HOMILETICS OF THE PARAGRAPH.—Pro_19:18-20
RELATIVE DUTIES
We have before considered Pro_19:18 in connection with Pro_19:13-14. A reference to the Critical Notes will, however, show that there is an interpretation of the last clause which was not treated there. Pro_19:19-20, regarded separately, embody thoughts and precepts which we have had before. (See Homiletics on chap. Pro_14:17; Pro_14:29, pages 363, 386, and on chap. Pro_12:15, page 271.) But these verses, taken in conjunction with the other interpretation of the last clause of Pro_19:18, may be regarded as giving valuable advice both to those who have to enforce discipline and administer chastisement, and to those who have to endure them.
I. Counsel for parents. The reasonableness and necessity of chastisement has been considered before, but the additional thought which the other rendering of Pro_19:18 makes prominent is, that it must be administered from a sense of duty, and dictated by love. Parents are far too apt to punish their children, not because they have sinned against God, but because they have offended them,—and when this is the case, the anger manifested deprives the correction of its salutary effect. “When the rod is used,” says Wardlaw,—and the words may be applied to any form of parental chastisement,—“the end in view should be, purely and exclusively, the benefit of the child; not the gratification of any resentful passion on the part of the parent. Should the latter be apparent to the child, the effect is lost, and worse than lost; for, instead of the sentiment of grief and melting tenderness, there will be engendered a feeling of sullen hostility, … if not, even, of angry scorn, towards him who has manifested selfish passion rather than parental love.” The parent must regard himself as God’s representative, and must act, not as for himself, but for the Divine Master and Father of both parent and child. If this is done, there will be none of that “provocation to wrath” or “discouragement,” against which Paul puts Christians on their guard (Col_3:21; Eph_6:4), and there will be good ground to hope that the chastisement will bring profit.
II. Counsel for children. The reasoning here is akin to that used by the Apostle in the twelfth of Hebrews. It is admitted by him (Pro_19:11-12) that “no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous;” nevertheless, those who have to endure it are exhorted to accept it with submission because of the precious after-yield—they are counselled to give themselves up to the Divine pruner and suffer Him to work His will upon them now, in consideration of the “peaceable fruits of righteousness” which will be the result in the days of harvest. So Solomon argues here. He does not deny that “counsel” and “instruction,” or rather discipline, may often be unpalatable and irksome, but he holds up the wisdom that may be gained by them as an incentive to induce the young to “hear” and to “receive” them—he “reaches a hand through time,” and “fetches the far-off interest” of what at present seems grievous in order to give effect to his exhortations. The actions of men in the present are mainly determined by the amount of consideration they give to the future. There are men who live wholly in the present hour—who gratify the fancy or follow the passion of to-day without giving a thought of the needs of to-morrow, or of the penalty that they may then have to pay for their folly. Others look ahead a little farther—they fashion the actions of to-day with a due regard to the interests of their whole future earthly life, but they bestow no thought upon the infinite “afterward” that is to succeed it. The proverb counsels both the young and the old to bring this long to-morrow into the plans of to-day, and to let the remembrance of it open the ear to the words of Divine wisdom by whomsoever they are spoken, and bend the will to receive the “chastening of the Lord,” whether it come in the form of parental discipline or in a sterner garb.
OUTLINES AND SUGGESTIVE COMMENTS
Pro_19:18-19. “Being in great wrath, remit the punishment; but if thou let him escape, yet apply (or add) chastisement again. (So Muffet renders Pro_19:19.) When thou are in thy mood, or burnest with fiery anger and displeasure, let pass for that time the correcting of thy child, lest thou passest measure therein, or mayest chance to give him some deadly blow. Nevertheless, if for that time or for that fault thou let him go free, yet let him not always go uncorrected; but when thou art more calm, according as he offereth occasion, correct him again.—Muffet.
Do not venom discipline by naked animosity. This is the human aspect. But now for the fine model of Jehovah. “He does not afflict willingly” (Lam_3:33). He follows this maxim: “Discipline thy son, because there is now hope.” But Solomon wishes plainly to declare that to kill him He does not lift up His soul. “He taketh no pleasure in the death of him that dieth, but that all should turn and live” (Eze_33:11). It is evidently these great timbers of thought that Solomon is eyeing at the bottom of his structure. He is settling them along in place. Secularly, they may have but little connection; spiritually, they are all morticed close.—Miller.
The Preacher's Complete Homiletical Commentary (gen. ed. Joseph S. Exell; Funk & Wagnalls, c. 1892) — public domain (pre-1929). A full-Bible homiletical/sermon-outline anthology covering 65 of 66 books (2 John is absent from the source module). Text from a community e-Sword module.
Paul E. Kretzmann 1924 · Public Domain v. 18. Chasten thy son while there is hope,…
v. 18. Chasten thy son while there is hope, correcting him, if necessary, by corporal punishment, and let not thy soul spare for his crying, literally, "and to his death do not lift up thy soul"; wisdom and love must know and observe the proper measure of punishment, knowing at the same time, that there is a cruel kindness, which kills by withholding seasonable correction.
Paul E. Kretzmann, Popular Commentary of the Bible (1921–1924) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.
Tyndale Open Study Notes 2022 · CC BY-SA 4.0 19:18 Growing in wisdom requires discipline for everyone, including…
19:18 Growing in wisdom requires discipline for everyone, including children (see 10:17; 13:1, 10; 15:31-32; 17:10). The temporary grief that accompanies discipline is worth the protection from ruin.
Tyndale Open Study Notes — © Tyndale Open Resources, licensed CC BY-SA 4.0. Text via the HelloAO Bible API.